Long Sucker Poems

Where art thou anonymous benefactor...to offer me succor?

Ah... methinks legal tender 
could be a boon to help me bolster 
mein kampf with necessary material equipage,
which prospect to acquire essential 
commodities sabotaged 
at the altar of...

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“Éagmais croí a dhíscaoileadh ar gach eagla.
Faoi dhíon taobh istigh de na blianta seo.
Fanacht i bhfianaise, a dhíscaoileadh ar gach eagla.
Ós rud é go ndearnadh tú a chaitheamh.
Briseadh an tost seo”



"An Bee Cailleach"


She lives to...

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Highlight of Goofus and Gallant 
bred within the survival instinct 
of hungry hordes of prey, 
when Earth in the balance 
against an uncomfortable truth 
smug smurf like scavengers. 

     Punishment meted...

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I don’t want to feel.
I tried that and it didn’t work. I tried to numb myself because I just feel alone. I don’t want to talk about it because feeling pathetic is not a very...

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Colin is a cabby with a proper taxi cab
He drives for all the passengers an Uber didn’t grab
Which means he has a lot of time to kill most every day
And lots of evil folk to...

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Increase In Head Size

impossible mission to encapsulate notion 
flitting hither and yon, to and fro
within cranium attached to mine body,
whereby irrefutable proof prevails
predicated when yours truly
scrutinizes other people visibly aware,
I a modest married male 
blessed,...

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Attitude with latitude

originally written January 19th, 2019
and tension defines the dynamic

Valiant prince sip pulled effort
rebuffed, snubbed, thumbed
courtesy eldest daughter
uncontested vainglorious woke
mine genuine apology,
viz sincerely yours truly
psyche asper paternal overture
toward aforementioned offspring
smitten with opprobrium
figuratively smacked upside...

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Come post presidential election 2024... 

heil to the Wharton chief firebrand -
more worrisome than an ovarian cyst
every race, religion, nationality, 
gender, creed, et cetera with impunity dissed
brigand able, eager, ready and willing
to punch contenders throwing...

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Lost libido as rez erected cockamamie Shtrungool haint no prickly fallacy

The following pastiche 
poetically pricked prick,
whereby fantasy courtesy Eros 
(????) cow licked
country bumpin videlicet hick
bullied who consider me 
on account of a dinky dick.

Me primate...

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(alternately titled: idolizing childhood's end
today April 25th, 2021
generates elusive warm treasured memories).

Akin to significance my eldest sister
felt toward her “Willies” –
(totally tubular fuzzy bendable contrivances
analogous to an outsize pipe cleaner)
until she became a tweener
my Matty...

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Wouldn't it seem to persist an unspoken personal longing for perfection?
Is insinuated toward poetic supremacy; obviously . . .
I would feel confident in generalizing the presence within us all—to achieve god-like greatness.
I must say, that...

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"Paper Tigers"



eyes mark slow time
spotting leopard rhyme
never changing its spots
black balled
white pops
the want-to-be bees
sting the dripping honey spot

slapping cards down
kitty pots are shuffled
bluffing intelligentsia
between the gaps
flatulent poets floss their teeth
waxing lyrical strings
tied to the weary...

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Sophistication of sinister online skulduggery...

lurks within the outer limits of cyberspace,
where dark shadows eclipse edge of night
indistinguishable from the twilight zone.

Within the Internet binary size weavers loom
shuttlecock whizzes (analogous to a bad mitten)
at speed of...

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It was in the mists of morning, beneath the rising morning sun,
We had come to conquer Ft. Langley, It was me and Al and John.
We had all teed off quite nicely, on number one I...

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You are now about to witness my lack of street knowledge
Straight outta lockdown,
lazy brother named THE DUDE
Formed a gang called diggers With Altitudes
Work is called off, I got a paid off
Strains getting quicker, and bodies...

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Argh daylight savings time ends – 2:00 AM November 6th 2022

Hour hands of o'clock get set back 
sixty minutes gaining extra hour of Autumn
round about this same day of November 
every year, what a bum
er,...

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Daylight Savings Time Ends – November 5th 2023 means...

discombobulated, harried, and lobotomized
state of body, mind, and spirit triage.

Onset of dark shadows signalling edge of night
occurs earlier as the world turns  
beckoning, hinting, robbing passage...

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Argh Daylight Savings Time – March 13th, 2022

Once again, yours truly
dishes out his regular dose
of literary gobbledygook
even Count Dracula
would not even bat an eye
nor give me his evil curse,
butta I avoid tempting him 
courtesy fanged...

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I still have that letter somewhere.
You made me promise to not tell anyone you wrote it.
So I kept that promise,
I kept it for thirty years.
I’m kinda thinking it’s long enough.

Why was I attracted to you?
It...

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Damn bad reputation counts 500 plus paw whet tick stints

The following fictitious poetic vignette attempts a feeble tale of one ordinary day in life of anonymous miscreant.

"I don't give a damn 
about my bad reputation."

I...

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It’s been 36 days since you were dethroned 
You were the free-standing house, I was the fist that ripped the power line in half 
You’re the ouija board to my spirits of the past,
You keep...

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I still feel under the weather today April 2nd, 2023

Unseen enemy invades my body 
with platoon of green berets air
rating, and enfilading immune system viz 
Hib bully knock and sock kin me 
courtesy roebuck seers...

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"Their World"

Of course, there was no re-assurance from them that they would respond to the message I had sent. Morning had arrived. 

The day had commenced as any other, unravelling out of bed, in itself...

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Argh Daylight Savings Time – March 14th, 2021

Once again, yours truly
dishes out his regular dose
of literary gobbledygook
even Count Dracula
would not even bat an eye
nor give me his evil,
(albeit harmless) look
regarding feeble effort I undertook.

Don't forget...

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Human Sack Gruff Ice Agonizingly Glommed...
Murderously Skewered, And Torturously Zapped

Directv linkedin to accentuate
piddly money crisis, tis zen uneasy fate,
I imagine dragons gyrate
ting, and licking chops, faux masticate
ting, no matter I didst pre
   ...

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