Long Spring chicken Poems

Roman à clef tragicomedy...
overlaid with façade of fiction = Mein Kampf

in summer re:
typed out during winter of my discontent,
when yours truly no spring chicken
stirred ruse to expatiate poetically
regarding following rhyming reason,
hence mine lovely bones 
into...

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Duracell Bunny No More

To her loyal fans,  Nicol Ann David is the Duracell Bunny in Woman Squash...
She dominated the rankings for an incredible 9 years in the World Woman Squash ...
While lesser players only...

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I absconded with reader rabbit (Peter), to celebrate Saint Patrick's Day

Ah Sheik Hog - Ho!
One "FAKE" Wingman 
think Monty Python's
Flying Circus skittering
on thin ice - Skidamarink 
a dink, a dink...

hither and yon, to and fro
Via...

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I absconded with reader rabbit (Peter), to celebrate Saint Patrick's Day

Ah Sheik Hog - Ho!
One "FAKE" Wingman 
think Monty Python's
Flying Circus skittering
on thin ice - Skidamarink 
a dink, a dink...

hither and yon, to and fro
Via...

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The spouse betook monthly outing
today May 4th, 2022 
to 3938B Ridge Pike, 
Collegeville, Pennsylvania 19426.

No more bare cupboards,
fridge, and deep freezer
since returning with more than
our share of daily bread,
plus other sundry provisions
referring to this mister,...

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No matter existence (mine) lamely, mostly, and nearly spent...

I barely experienced
getting clothed (think fashion wise
as metaphorically swiftly tailored
harried styled mortal)
approaching naked truth
regarding life, liberty

and pursuit of happiness..,
nonetheless yours truly forever gropes
in the darkness of ignorance...

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As the rain comes pouring down, and patters against my window sill, 
I think of you, and how wonderful you make me feel.  How much I truly 
love you, like I love the rain;...

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No more bare cupboards,
fridge, and deep freezer
since returning with more than
our share of daily bread
referring to this mister, who

frightfully squawks like an old geezer,
plus the missus
also ain't no spring chicken,
being locked within crosshairs
elderly stage, she...

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Joyous rapture awoke sleeping animalistic giant: 
carnal, feral, gonadal horniness in deed, when defiant

this primate crossed figurative 
   paths with a stunning woman 
older than a spring chicken freed 
   via...

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How did the phrase “Spitting Image” originate
Seems kinda gross to me
Now here's something I've often wondered about
Do Queens expectorate... surely Kings do
For that matter, they pass wind too
Some people... okay some men...
Make a big production...

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BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION

For my birthday celebration,
My husband Peter and I,
Wanted to give the pub a miss,
Instead a posh restaurant try.

I dolled up for the occasion,
In a shimmering gown of white.
I felt like a million dollars,
As we...

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Whoever invented the Kiss
I'd like to shake their hand
But I won't
 
Because I'm shortsighted and always miss
It wouldn't be such a problem
If I had Mick Jaggers's lips
But the boss
My Mrs doesn't like it
And slaps me...

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Every time I sneeze or cough

Either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires!

Shouldn't be a big surprise

It's a definite sign we ain't no young chicken no more

When you grunt just putting on your socks

It's the...

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Sand flows much too quickly in that goldarn hour glass
I'm no spring chicken, but I'll have to take a pass
If a guy thinks he rocks
Wearing fuzzy socks and crocs
That nerdy look is just too dorky...

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ALONG FOR THE RIDE

We race through streams of mud, looking like bank bandits,
our bandanas fastened around mouth and nose. Open-air
vehicles, look like skeletons, and the roar of its engine leaves
no room for conversation. But I...

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SENIOR MOMENTS


In our lives, there comes a time
When we find that we're past our prime
Even though we're no spring chicken
We're glad to be alive and kickin'

Maybe our hair is thin and gray
But it doesn't have...

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I'M AS YOUNG AS I FEEL
I'M NOT GETTING OLD. I'M AS YOUNG AS CAN BE.
THERE'S NOTHING AT ALL THE MATER WIT ME.
MY HAIR IS NOT GRAY. THERE'S A SILVERY SHINE.
MY BACK IS NOT BENT I'VE...

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Each year, if I can help it,
On my birthday I'm away
In a place I've never been before
To celebrate the day.

So today I am in Asheville,
A delightful mountain town,
Filled with arts and crafts and sunshine -
Not...

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The time spent thinking up these rhymes,
could be put to better use.
I could learn a language, or DIY the house.
Maybe learn to fly a plane, or sail across the sea,
or walk across the Gobi, and...

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I once went out on a blind date
But that'll never happen again
A not so pleasant experience
When I was set up by a friend

He said, "She has but one problem,"
"I noticed as she crossed the street,"
"It's...

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Although I’m no spring chicken,
I’d really like to say.
I finished my spring-cleaning,
only yesterday.

I sprung around the house,
cleaning high and cleaning low;
Stood back,
admired my work with face all aglow.

Then I went into the garden,
To plant out...

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I want to live in a spaceship house he said.
His wife thought he was being silly, but he meant it.
He planned it for a decade or more.
She pooh poohed his idea.

Then he met a young...

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I swear it is raining outside today
Anyway, it feels like it in my bones.
Arthritis has kicked up her heels
Reminding me I am not a spring chicken
Or even a lively old tired worn-out rooster
I am long...

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