Long Sarcasm Poems
Long Sarcasm Poems. Below are the most popular long Sarcasm by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Sarcasm poems by poem length and keyword.
I wear the stars like a vintage jacket—zippers of bold contradictions. One day, I’m a storm; the next, I’m a rainbow with a cigarette. My laugh? It’s a brushstroke across canvas, full of sarcasm and a splash of love. I know the constellations of me, and when I speak—it’s a rock concert tangled with a philosophy class. I don’t fit any box—I burned the box, lit a candle, and read tarot on its ashes. Every page I turn is my next brushfire of originality. I breathe in the irony of life and exhale an artful smirk. Every step I take, I leave footprints of both sass and sincerity. I’m a walking contradiction, glitter and grit. I know what Saturn’s return means and I dare it to try me. I’ll dance under the moon, debate under the sun, and when the day’s done, I’ll still be fabulously, mercurially, uniquely me.
Then what to his wand'ring blund'ring eye should appear
A comely young lass willing to spread dread and fear
Even much better's she married much older
"All the better to see you my Dear and be bolder.
I delight in the fright and things will be dandy.
If it will be spread by some winsome eye candy."
All the while this Grinch swallows and wallows in pardon
While he plays DJ where the roses were gardened
You can hear 'midst the din, hue and cry in the land
But this is the guy who now picks the bands
That will be centering all our attention
There will be no mention of any dissension
Because Sinterclause cows the Press and the Right
"Merry Xmas to all", unless we say, "Good night!"
Your harsh words
Your morbid silence
Your dirty looks
Your dark violence
Will bend me
Will bend me
But I will not break!
Your stinging sarcasm
Your childish spite
Your evil meanness
Your brutish might
Will make me flicker
Will make me flicker
But I will not go out!
Your cold indifference
Your devious lies
Your stubborn pride
Your sad disguise
Will make me wither
Will make me wither
But I will not fall!
You may bruise me
You may abuse me
You may taunt me
You may haunt me
You may strike me
You may dislike me
You may wonder why
Though so hard you try...
I will never
I will NEVER
Lay down and die!
When I re-broach a pressing, unresolved issue,
I wish you’d engage me in productive, fair debate
instead of withering me with sarcasm.
When did your seeming love for me morph into hate?
When I can’t do whatever you ask of me
“Right NOW,” I wish you would patiently wait.
I wish you wouldn't rudely foist your duties off on me.
You know I already have a full plate.
I wish you would stop treating me as your underling.
I long to be valued, as your equal, your cherished mate.
Please mend fences. Don't force me to leave
and burn bridges behind me. It will soon be too late!
Agile to the max and once, so skinny and insecure...musing of the past abuse and amusing you don't care at all...sarcasm rolls down my long tongue of lamentation...
Mind over matter and my response is to truly endure from this furious frustration and wicked, wicked elation
Blessings bring me smiles of joy
I am an ambiverted kid, oh boy...
Very much so - exactly - so coy~
Excited and nervous to say the least
Right on, let's have a fervent, fearless feast!!!
Tread the road of recovery with me forevermore - we are never alone
Embarrassed because I made a fool out of me to the core on the phone
Dreaded this moment - I must stand up for what's right and more on my own
Kid's kites in the sky - I'm high in the clouds of thinking-aloud shrouds
Imagine being accepted wholeheartedly in all aspects of life
Desiring peace over strife, though guilt cuts like a knife...I am seeking my future beautiful, wonderful wife...
Tag, you're it; chosen in the game of life,
it's your turn to decipher its meaning.
Though sarcasm can be as sharp as a knife,
it's a deeper cut that's oft demeaning
and faults common sense for intervening.
To a child, who thinks the world's a playground,
it's impressive; till it becomes a bore.
But life's no joke, and you are not a clown,
so don't let the umpteen things you abhor
cast shadows over the few you adore.
Age provides the lectern for wizened speech,
but no one hears; they have no ears for you.
Reluctant pupils, they're hard to reach,
that is the way of things; there's nothing new
to learn if you believe that to be true.
We're fully aware that our time will end,
and we wonder if reality's real.
For; it is difficult to find a friend
you trust enough to tell them how you feel,
a lifeline that, at times, seems surreal.
Fly little seagull, fly with your oily wings
Or have some tasty dead oily fish
It will slip down the throat with ease
We humans call it a Gulf oil spill dish
We humans all love to go to the beach
Lay there all oiled up and tan
Why cannot the birds and fish
The Gulf oil will help it really can
The governments allow us to chop the trees
Destroying the rain forests with axes
Why not a little oil spill
They’ll cover it by raising taxes
So don’t pay any attention to the Gulf
And the life destroyed by the oil spill
Just lay back relax and enjoy
We’ll mop it up later just chill
In lieu of love give me hate,
In lieu of age give me an imagination, even if it is too late.
In lieu of sex give me chocolate,
In lieu of a grave give me a ride to Mars on a rocket.
In lieu of sadness give me happiness and glee,
In lieu of pride give me humbleness, please hear my plea.
In lieu of beauty give me a heart of gold,
In lieu of fear give me courage allowing me to be bold.
In lieu of desperation give me hope,
In lieu of weakness give me strength to climb the mountainous slope.
In lieu of cowardice give the power to fight,
In lieu of darkness give me a soul that lights the night.
In lieu of inferiority give me a ladder to climb,
In lieu of confusion give me reason to my rhyme.
In lieu of death give me time,
In lieu of purgatory give me the sublime.
In lieu of a man's priorities give me motherhood,
In lieu of the big city give me the backwoods.
In lieu of captivity give me wide open spaces,
In lieu of sadness give me happy faces.
In lieu of music give me the laughter of my daughter and son,
In lieu of sarcasm give me a good pun.
In lieu of the cold give me warmth,
In lieu of stepping back let me race forth.
In lieu of ignorance give me an amazing brain,
In lieu of hunger give me grain.
In lieu of pain give me pleasure,
In lieu of squalor give me treasure.
In lieu of lying give me a tongue that speaks true,
In lieu of loneliness give me you!
I tickled funny bones of five Souper men
So I gave thought to trying it once again
In the order they replied
My sarcasm was applied
As I gently heckled them with ink and pen
First, Tom Cunningham, who "liked my collection"
To femme limericks he had no objection
But now it's his turn
Tom, forgive the burn
I heard you're headed for a house of correction
Jerry T Curtis said to "keep them coming"
But I think that lately he's been slumming
He's all aflutter
And starts to stutter
When his lady friend starts his heart strumming
Then there was the poet of romance, Tim Smith
His sweet words of seduction are not a myth
I know it to be truth
Don't ask me. It's uncouth
I don't kiss and tell so I'm pleading the fifth
John Gondolf said my limericks made him "chuckle"
His comments are always filled with honeysuckle
But if he wants a date
I'll have to castigate
I have a black belt in the use of my knuckles
"I needed smiles and giggles," said Greg Barden
His poems are flowers blooming in a garden
But some words are couture
Fertilized with manure
Now I guess I'll have to beg for Greg's pardon
Gentlemen, I ask forgiveness for this spoof
My humorous parodies should be the proof
That I like all of you
And don't mind if ya do
Get even in your own limericks of reproof
Don’t hurt me with your words
Don’t hurt me
Lies, innuendos, sarcasm, put-downs
Don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me with your eyes
Don’t hurt me
Disdain, lust, skepticism, disrespect
Don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me with your hands
Don’t hurt me
Pinching, pulling, scratching, slapping
Don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me with your silence
Don’t hurt me
Indifference, abhorrence, neglect, control
Don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me with your punishment
Don’t hurt me
NO touch, NO kiss, NO hug, NO SEX
Don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me….
Don’t hurt me
…………………….. because you've been hurt
Don’t hurt me
……………………...because you are in pain
Don’t hurt me
………………………because it feels good to you
Don’t hurt me
……………………..because you feel purged
Please, don’t hurt me…
My body will heal
My mind will never
So please….
……………….Please!
…………………………..STOP
…………………………………….HURTING
………………………………………………………ME!
Eileen Manassian Ghali
For all those who suffer verbal, physical, mental, emotional absuse!