Long Mattel Poems

(alternately titled: idolizing childhood's end
today April 25th, 2021
generates elusive warm treasured memories).

Akin to significance my eldest sister
felt toward her “Willies” –
(totally tubular fuzzy bendable contrivances
analogous to an outsize pipe cleaner)
until she became a tweener
my Matty...

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Nutter Butter. Almond Joy, Mounds Bars, and Cherry Mash.
Those candy manufacturers know how to name to get their cash.
We contenders scoff; we snicker and sneer.
The toymaker crazy idea brigade has just arrived here.

Someone throws out,...

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Thankfully wife as helpmate available,
when yours truly feels unswell
her tender loving care can spell
relief afflicted which she can hopefully quell
but spouse of mine, he doth not aim to oversell
nevertheless counterpart valued
as once me Matty Mattel
prized...

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What's new with me...Matthew?

Well for starters Nationwide
road service emergency
one man cutting crew
with battery charger in tow knew
exactly why no juice (think electricity),
his hunch found trunk light kept lit,
an innocent looking (to me or you)
lady's handbag...

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While meditating earlier today,
a flashback leapt
     clear for me to assay,
those ever receding

     early boyhood daze,
     now subsumed within fifty,
plus nine shades of...

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Deserted we lie, banished to a shoe box; discarded metal
scraping metal every spring as our ignored box gets shelved 
in a different room of the house; forsaken and further away
from real life. We demand equal...

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To help you with your history class
These all happened in the past
February 4th to be exact
And you can take it all as fact

The year was 1959 – the Barbie Doll was born
Kids thought it just...

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Barbie’s precision, stiff, lounging in glamorous style, 
Plastic pink body asleep in a brand new cardboard box.
Barbie, eyes still open, abused by many of Ken's wiles,
She was once truly human, her daughter opens the lock.
The...

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She was the prettiest doll in the whole world,	
Elegant, stunning, waist-less, buxom,
Curves all over the place,
No straight lines.

Shocking for a child’s toy 
Shocking for 1959.
Mattel was by far
Ahead of their time.

Marilyn Monroe and
Jane Mansfield were
Our...

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Barbie was the ultimate fashionista.
I received her when I was nine;
she had a shape; no ordinary baby doll.
No baby at all. It was embarrassing to dress her.
Or rather undress her.

Then we had Midge. A friend...

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blowjobs behind park washrooms.
family packs of porkchops.
fisherprice or mattel.
pornstars praising jesus.
99 cent lipstick in pink shimmer.
aluminum christmas trees.
$5 viles of heroine.
made in china.
happy meals, 50% less plastic.
metal detectors in highschool.
colt 45 and the price of...

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They want to be skin and bones with plastic wasters, 
They want to be stupid, they want to be famous, 
Fake, superficial and contagious, 
"She don't want your love, 
She wants your money, boy." 

Modern...

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The Barbie Doll Flap

By Elton Camp

A group of folks are raising hell
Asking a fat Barbie from Mattel

Should a doll be impossibly thin
Or preferable to have a double chin?

Seems to me that what we’ve got
Is the...

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On March the 9th in ‘59
Some frowned and many cheered
‘Cause that’s the date a brand-new doll
Named Barbie first appeared.

Though girls were mostly smitten
Critics very soon attacked
Because her body image
Was what all her owners lacked.

Her measurements...

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