Long Kit and caboodle Poems
Long Kit and caboodle Poems. Below are the most popular long Kit and caboodle by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Kit and caboodle poems by poem length and keyword.
A query one respondent
sent didst seem
tummy tubby sincere, possibly
channeled by cyber sea men,
via bayou A true Britt, aye esteem,
sans abba ra ca dab invoked
by the spirit Jim Beam
unwittingly unleashed theme
for this reason
one humble rhyme
stir, Me doth write,
boot promise NOT TO SCREAM
for convenient idea
to expound ream
(room) minute eight ting,
about mine previous poem
"Sleep Inducing Powers...
Computer Screen"
smote an idea,
I could never outdream,
no need to search,
cuz renown unknwn fan gave
rise to his nonmainstream
re: "By the way, Matthew,
"How do you like
your Lenovo computer?"
Perhaps understandably
concluded the whole green
kit and caboodle
tubby a stand alone lean
(and few an proud) machine
sprung from Apple royalty,
(well linkedin to
a stevedore jobber seam
ming lee on same playing
field as a queen
(comprising an A-1
actor/ actress team)
with Ali MacGraw -
his wife number deux
which thread strays
coon sitter ably,
where unsuspecting reader few
ming with for me (easily)
getting off track -
tis only hue
man and hoopfully NOT Jew
van aisle attempting to interweave
more than one
concept (delicately loo
ping sentence strands),
where warp, and
woof no...no...new
NOT for any
largesse, nor moo
hoof fish hints,
but singing Giacomo Antonio
Domenico Michele
Secondo Maria Poo
shin knee (the above
very long name, actually
authentic i.e. "NOT FAKE"
a stand alone queue
oh...whoa yes..yes...
yes please shew
tolerance, how elegiac
these metaphors too
be compared with
operatic flourishes I view
as vital breathtaking woo
wing chords nsync with Lenovo "sue
do" flatscreen (NOT A COMPUTER)
yet expanded field of you
alphanumeric characters
in no way resembles Zulu!
I have marked my place,
I stand now in the
bulging vein of the moment.
No more hunting for meaning
or for anti-meaning,
all socks are white or not.
I am here.
a one-sized loosely fitted mind,
a tick and cross
on an illogical checklist,
acres stacked upon acres
of fifth dimensional
doubt, faith, and gnosis,
a bottomless barrel of chewed-over laughter.
I am all things and nothing,
happy to be
whatever you see
and I will not
gainsay your worst opinions,
but embrace every layer of the onion
even though you cannot perceive
the chameleon gifts
of my all too human superpowers,
or my agreeable acceptance
of your legendary life.
I am rooted in truth
and conspiratorial speculation
finding no fault in either
but still a knowing of what I am,
could have been or was.
I am raised up in my lowliness and glory
no longer there or anywhere
simply this kit and caboodle, this enchilada.
deeply sorry to be so unrepentant
and mostly happy to be sorry,
not a worry
or any flurry of guilt.
Expunged and indelibly revealed
as this ingenuity of self,
here now and gone
all along.
The Slide Ruler
As regulations rule this world from outside in and my time slowly
seeps away on this planet’s realm I gaze in awe at that once modern
instrument of calculation that dangles from the ceiling lamp in my
~ Study ~
In forward looking nostalgia my memories ambivalent a reminder of
words scripted on paper in fountain pen and blotting paper absorbing
the logic never understood derived from square rooted calculus’s incisive
~ Precision ~
I failed the examination maybe my hands were too clumsy or my mind
too entangled in quests of a different kind of looming poet trees
in onward advances flooding naive crafting knitting dreams and emotional
~ Liberation ~
I tried to run away and on track right by the start of a marathon
real and timed in a fast moving obsession I discovered my ruler sliding
into my fingers for a Euro in red plastic casing with figures organizing
~ Incomprehension ~
Metaphorical and analogue to a desire to escape from the dogma of science
eschewing the unquestioned paradigm of only one truth and one answer
only as well as the modern compulsion with bits and apps it reminds me of
~ Signposts ~
Trivial directives which lead me away and beyond of what can be counted
calculated in the hamster wheeling rat race of pretending to know
exactly what is an illusion in any case plastic or iron cased in
~ Rationalization ~
Nevertheless and because of what I could not understand with a
slide ruler and the pretence of computer colonized minds around me
I cherish not simply for all time’s sake that comprehension results from
~ Fragmentation ~
And thus found the whole kit and caboodle the complementation of
polarity synthesized opposites complemented diversity celebrated in the
festival of life and the living with brick a brack completing the meaning of
~ Life ~
24th October 2016
Old Jewelry Or Just Old Things Contest
Have you ever seen a kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle
Sometimes barks like a little doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he meows like a *****cat
Or sometimes quacks like a duck
Once got amorous with a moo cow
Outcome could've been disastrous
Luckily came to his senses in time
Almost had our first kangcowrous
They're treating him for psychosis
It's costing him a bunch of dough
Maybe he'll act like a kangaroo again
For his sake, we sure hope it's so
There's a moral here, it's very simple
It's about knowing who you are
Being happy within the skin you're in
And not coveting another star!
© Jack Ellison 2013
...exhortations against Ole Saint Nick
(alternately titled untold treasured shenanigans of Santa)
his elves and reindeer discovered only
by colluding via "FAKE" fluke
did I manage to worm winning the trust
among Christmas elves and reindeer
confident this generic guy,
would never breach scandalous
tidbits, into an underground impregnable
air-raid shelter, the Motley Crue
tied blindfold over my eyes, didst steer
me hermetically sealed,
which crawl space required me to hunker
sound (cloud) proof bunker
while ensconced (security detail munchkins,
who just so happened tubby *****
minded entrance portal)
only after getting the thumb up signal,
whereat nose pies planted
espionage surveillance devices
the chief head honcho and attendants,
Smoky and the bandits respectively,
magically, and handily did appear
and despite one hundred percent bug-free,
a whispered stance opted just to make sure
no unwanted eavesdropper could overhear
plus every participant swore an oath, cuz
any leaked real or “FAKE” information,
would spell imminent demise to be near
the upshot, sans grave emergency
describing clandestine arraignment
involving some rogue elf
(most likely at least two),
and a misbehaving reindeer
(names withheld to avoid any spoiler alert),
plus this entire kit and caboodle
necessary to help Saint Nick
got wind, (and subsequently reined in)
a rave party with orgiastic
sex, drugs and rock and roll
that a band-aided elf(ves) hest
laced with Pepper Minstix
(anonymously hashtagged Sodom and Gomorrah)
sullied pure as the driven snow repute,
when aliasing Sugarplum Mary (“FAKE NAME”)
detected snorting cocaine
codenamed Alabaster Snowball,
while additionally besmirching her virginity
via coital cavorting amidst a Bushy Evergreen
shaking as if frenzied with feverish boogie woogie flu
which seductive, prurient,
and master baiter friend zeed
(spunky Gangnam style) Shinny Upatree
which could slay Wunorse Openslae reputation
as substance abusers,
and sex offenders if not worse.
Form:
Have you ever seen a kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle
He sometimes barks like a doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he meows like a kitty cat
Or sometimes quacks like a duck
Once got amorous with a moo cow
Outcome could've been disastrous
Luckily came to his senses in time
Almost had our first kangacowerous
They're treating him for psychosis
It's costing him a bunch of dough
Maybe he'll act like a kangaroo again
For his sake, we sure hope that's so
There's a moral here, it's very simple
It's about knowing who you are
Being happy with the skin you're in
And not coveting another star!
©Jack Ellison 2012
I just found out two poodles that I bought
were ferrets! Ay caramba! And guess what?
To make each one resemble less a rat,
they gave them steroids, making them both fat!
They also fluffed their pretty fur just so
around their heads. So how was I to know?
Each one looked so much like a toy poodle
they had me fooled - whole kit and caboodle!
Our veterinarian has verified
the facts for me. Those poodle dealers lied.
And folks now say I should have realized
the truth, which stared at me with beady eyes!
Those ferrets sure run fast; I think I’ll buy
two tiny leashes, or else I could try. . .
to sucker someone stupider than me.
Hey, buy one poodle; get the other free!
For Janice Canerdy's Rhyming Couplets Poetry Contest
* I wrote this April 22, 2013 after hearing a news story about a guy who actually believed he had bought a poodle when it was a ferret on steroids! See above for the link to the news footage!
H-E-L-P!!! N-e-e-d s-o-m-e b-o-d-y!!!...
Spouse booby trapped husband!!!
Homicide courtesy munch
house zen by proxy
immediately suspected hunch
police, K9 corps, and ambulance
nearly lost their lunch crossing over divide
yellow crime tape
cordoned off homicide
booted feet did poetically crunch
while leashes untangled,
viz braided bunch.
Law enforcement officers i.e. they
Perkiomen Township precinct tidy
as... executive attache
case headed by narcotics
mod squad trooper Amelie
Beth knew address of scrivener brother
immediately quaffed mouthful Schuylkill
downing requisite with "FAKE" sedative cray
zee that seems giving
judicious punch to allay
time and again marital altercations daresay
put Schwenksville neighborhood
under immediate lockdown
Bay of Pigs in comparison childsplay
summoned rookies re:
instant karma coldplay
witnessed unusual display
officers, paramedics, and trained
German shepherds on faux pas did pray
(canines formerly under religious sway
nsync with neutered saint Matthew Scott
sacred church fathers and mothers
panglossian benevolence ne'er betray
loved spouting doggerel pay
Canis lupus familiaris obeissance
oh... I got scent tum mental anyway
kit and caboodle - women in blue,
plus aforementioned cod ray
regarding medical technicians
braced themselves steely, fiery, burly,...
former career recruits, thus okay
toughened courtesy green beret
fearless motley crew did sashay
gingerly, nimbly, softly... treading listening
faintly hearing sauntered without delay,
whence plaintive bent down on haunches
analogous to plie (plea yea)
including dogs ready to spring,
where overly curious inquisitive nee
bores asked to take selfie oy vey
afterwards quickly made bee line
discerning most strategic way
to enter apartment and rescue
a scene no stranger Giacomo Casanova,
to Rabelais, or Marquis de Sade
chaos theory put thru paces
mind boggling utter disarray
courtesy the missus
floor to ceiling clutter, perhaps soiree
gone awry with personal paraphernalia
strewn helter skelter hodge podge
bajillion potential accidents away
one misstep to temper and disable
garden variety trumpeting popinjay.
the (better late than never)
free admission confession, exhortations against Ole Saint Nick
treasured untold shenanigans of Santa,
his elves and reindeer discovered only
by colluding via "FAKE" fluke
did I manage to worm winning the trust
among Christmas elves and reindeer
confident this generic guy,
would never breach scandalous
tidbits, into an underground impregnable
air-raid shelter, the Motley Crue
tied blindfold over my eyes, didst steer
me hermetically sealed,
which crawl space required me to hunker
sound (cloud) proof bunker
while ensconced (security detail munchkins,
who just so happened tubby *****
minded entrance portal)
only after getting the thumb up signal,
whereat nose pies planted
espionage surveillance devices
the chief head honcho and attendants,
Smoky and the bandits respectively,
magically, and handily did appear
and despite one hundred percent bug-free,
a whispered stance opted just to make sure
no unwanted eavesdropper could overhear
plus every participant swore an oath, cuz
any leaked real or “FAKE” information,
would spell imminent demise to be near
the upshot, sans grave emergency
describing clandestine arraignment
involving some rogue elf
(most likely at least two),
and a misbehaving reindeer
(names withheld to avoid any spoiler alert),
plus this entire kit and caboodle
necessary to help Saint Nick
got wind, (and subsequently reined in)
a rave party with orgiastic
sex, drugs and rock and roll
that a band-aided elf(ves)
laced with Pepper Minstix
(anonymously hashtagged Sodom and Gomorrah)
sullied pure as the driven snow repute,
when aliasing Sugarplum Mary (“FAKE NAME”)
detected snorting cocaine
codenamed Alabaster Snowball, while additionally
besmirching her virginity via coital cavorting
amidst a Bushy Evergreen
shaking as if frenzied
with feverish boogie woogie flu
which seductive, prurient,
and master baiter friend zeed
(spunky Gangnam style) Shinny Upatree
which could slay Wunorse Openslae reputation
as substance abusers,
and sex offenders if not worse.
Has this ever happened to you, my friends
Was walking my sweetie down the lane
When out pops a sign post and belts me one
Rattles me and shakes up my brain
Was trying to impress my sweetie pie
There was nothing but love on my mind
No doubt my honey was quite unimpressed
Thought I was an idiot of some kind
Tried hard to pretend it was no big deal
As stars buzzed round in my noodle
Attempted to speak only gibberish came out
Affected my whole kit and caboodle
I've always been known as a bit of a klutz
But now try to avoid any shocks
My sweetie and me still enjoy the scenery
But I wear a helmet on our walks!
@Jack Ellison 2012