Long Kit and caboodle Poems

I went out for the newspaper at the usual time this morning, shortly after 5AM, (yes, I'm one of the "odd few" who still enjoys the crisp feel of a morning paper in my hands),...

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Harold the Hugh Hefner wannabe carrot top...

spry buck analogous to energizing bunny 
jump/kickstarted procreation ruckus.

Home on the range 
cacophony quite absurd
PlayBoy Bunny herd
and felt ingratiatingly inured,
nevertheless colony or nest 
of doe eyed demoiselles 
stewed over...

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As precautionary measure...
 
I backed up all software
resident on fifteen inch 
Macbook Pro computer
yesterday December first 
two thousand twenty two
courtesy two terabyte 
Seagate external drive.

Hardware not necessarily superfluous
when associating, assessing, and assaying
true value to equipment...

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Each year we drive to the south of Spain to soak up the sun's warm rays
But we like to maintain a leisurely pace, so it takes us two full days

Which means we stay at Hotel-and-Go,...

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H-E-L-P!!!     N-e-e-d     s-o-m-e      b-o-d-y!!!...
Spouse booby trapped husband!!!

Homicide courtesy munch
house zen by proxy
immediately suspected hunch
police, K9 corps, and ambulance
nearly lost their lunch crossing...

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the (better late than never) 
free admission confession, exhortations against Ole Saint Nick

treasured untold shenanigans of Santa, 

his elves and reindeer discovered only 

by colluding via "FAKE" fluke 

did I manage to worm winning the...

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...exhortations against Ole Saint Nick
(alternately titled untold treasured shenanigans of Santa)

his elves and reindeer discovered only 
by colluding via "FAKE" fluke 
did I manage to worm winning the trust
among Christmas elves and reindeer

confident this generic...

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The Slide Ruler

As regulations rule this world from outside in and my time slowly
                 seeps away on this planet’s...

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only by a fluke did I manage 
   to worm winning trust 
   among Christmas elves and reindeer
confident this generic guy, 

   would never breach scandalous 
  ...

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A query one respondent
     sent didst seem
tummy tubby sincere, possibly
     channeled by cyber sea men,
via bayou A true Britt, aye esteem,
sans abba ra ca dab invoked
 ...

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The Labradoodle

It’s clear that the scamp is a Poodle
By its frolicsome dabble and doodle
But add a big part
Of the Labrador’s heart
And you’ve got the whole kit and caboodle

The Labrador Retriever (Lab)

The Lab a friend gave...

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Potential cause célèbre dermatological solution
to stem palmar hyperhidrosis,
which medical break thru a last ditch effort
if Glycopyrrolate ineffective
to stave off sweaty hands.

Venerable Doctor Harold Milstein
an acclaimed dermatologist
possesses over 45 years
experience with Dermatologic Care,
Cosmetic Dermatology, and
Mohs Surgery...

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I ain't surprised by anything I hear on the news nowadays!
The way the gov'mint is bein' run just leaves me in a daze!
This mornin' I heard another of Obama's schemes has gone sour!
Seems that this...

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If there's frost on your noodle, don't despair
It's a sign of genius if you've got grey hair

But the experts say when the colour takes flight
Intelligence doesn't just happen overnight

It takes years and years of bumps...

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I have marked my place,
I stand now in the
bulging vein of the moment.
No more hunting for meaning
or for anti-meaning,
all socks are white or not.
I am here.
a one-sized loosely fitted mind,
a tick and cross 
on an...

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If there's frost on your noodle, don't despair
It's a sign of genius if you've got grey hair

But the experts say when the colour takes flight
Intelligence doesn't just happen overnight

It takes years and years of bumps...

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A Jim-Jam Mickey-Mouse Poem

I think that you might never see
A poem as weird as this might be
For I’ll use luscious words
That otherwise might sound absurd
This poem may turn out silly-sally
Or even a bit dillydally
In hindsight...

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I just found out two poodles that I bought
were ferrets!  Ay caramba! And guess what?

To make each one resemble less a rat,
they gave them steroids, making them both fat!

They also fluffed their pretty fur...

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Similar sounds and letter alliteration are literally leaping and precipitously punctuating the 
perforated pages of my mired, muddled mind.. 
     Making mental maps for future fun in meditation mired muse, meticulously...

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Us guys never lose our love for the opposite sex

It's deeply engrained in our psyche

It's obvious every single day of our lives

We travel life's highway admiring the scenery passing by

This one make me sit up...

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I confess I've been known to partake
Straight icing sans chocolate cake
I concede I shall never be lean
Pouring fudge without the ice cream

It's apparent my tool-shed doth grow
Baked cookies? Just gimmie the dough
It is rumored that...

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Have you ever seen a  kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle

He sometimes barks like a doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he...

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Have you ever seen a kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle

Sometimes barks like a little doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he meows...

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Have you ever seen a  kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle

He sometimes barks like a doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he...

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Has this ever happened to you, my friends
Was walking my sweetie down the lane
When out pops a sign post and belts me one
Rattles me and shakes up my brain

Was trying to impress my sweetie pie
There...

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