Long Hallucinating Poems
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In my deepest darkest hour
There is no one to talk too.
No one understands and the world is too busy to care!
Lost and confused I write these words in fear
I live in a heartless , cruel world.
My children believe their dad is as good as gold.
But at nights away from their innocent eyes,
He conceals a deep, dim , deadly secret.
A secret that plaque his soul,
Terrifies his victims:
A victim of which I am.
a bully is he!
The monster within that torments and surpresses my very soul.
My family and friends think I am hallucinating,
If you knew him you too may think I am crazy.
To the human eye he looks humble
Violence may not be of his nature
But you are wrong he is scary!
Violent is his character.
Your children will fear him ,
Their dreams will be awaken,
The monster that lives within has no compassion.
His heart is as cold as ice
His hands lay heavy on your throat
Legend I call him many is he,
Your daughters may know him,
His scent may possest them.
Who am I to warn you?
I am only a victim crazy you may call me,
A fool I maybe,
Safe I am no more.
No corner, no closet can hide me
This demon devours me,
Death has a hold on me ,
Sweet angel release me.
When nylon nights
trade crystal colours
in the stalls of nimble
butterfly wings,
I blossom as an
irenic origami
fervently fabricated
with snowflakes of
greedy gloom,
stealing royal violets
from the smokey estuaries
flowing beneath the
heavens befogged
with indigos, glistening
in periwinkle-arcs of
abstract auroras.
I reminisce those
amaranth stars
that whisper
graphical pantoums in
pearlescent pixels
of plum pentagon-
shaped skies,
as everytime when
porcelain acrylics
get spilt upon mauve
pages ribboned
with hydrangeas,
my orchid lips spin
a twist of leathered
spells amidst
frozen fahrenheit of
frostbit textures.
Painting heliotropic
oxygen with brushstrokes
of peony petals,
I carry unspoken
words of iris,
so that artificial aroma
within sculptured truths
remains caged
behind these dark
magenta carnations
printed upon
cashmere curtains
of hallucinating hyacinths.
Do photogenic pansies
never get frozen in iced pyre
of parched patchworks?
For, I believe that,
drowsy poppies
too have streaks of
wine stories
to narrate in their
ages of ache.
Perhaps, I'm a
glasswinged sorceress
of arctic hailstorms,
tracing phlox-
fluorescent forests
with tropical crayons,
as oiled hues of
multi-dusks flutter
across lavender orbs,
sprinkling mauve
dewdrops upon
watercolor dusts of
pencil-shaded luna
who unlocks
silver secrets
with skeleton key,
washing my bones
with lilac fog.
So, when these
thistle shaded leaves
crack their crystal
cocoons and
the sun sheds its
fluffed feathers
of hibernation,
meet me along the
horizons where
bright Veronica
takes the shape of
the moon and
reincarnates as a
crocheted sangria
memory along the
translucent sleet of
snowy sights.
My skin is softer
than raisin pearls
of mulberry seas,
as my spirit is stained
with glamorous grape
dyes and amethyst-fresco
distemper across bitter
skies has discoloured
every apathetic shade
that doesn't seem to
define my airbrushed
heather heart.
Calmoruus calamity
Calm, in feather doona encumbered,
slept soundly.
Even the stars twinkled
in hushed, squelched, muted tones.
Silence reigned in solemnity, in peace.
All of a sudden
the deafening din
of cacophonic hard rock shrill
rattled the rafters,
jolted the sleepers
starkly to upright awake.
I ran into the living room
with hands covering my ears.
The wee little 'Nest' device,
throbbing there next to the
rumbling pulsing speakers
was hallucinating, tripping.
Its lights doing a late-night give.
The telly was flashing
bright disco light shows and tells.
I shouted to Siri with all my might
"Off, All OFF, Cancel, Reset, Exit, F-Off",
But all to no avail.
How could dear Siri,
nested there so snugly, hear me
above the infernal din?
I grabbed the remote but it too
was away with the pixies, pixelating.
with its LED's flashing, winking a beat in tune.
In desperation I dragged
the speaker's electrical cables
right outta the wall.
Ah! silence reigned again.
But then, then, then,
the neighbors lights all around lit up
like a Christmas tree on steroids.
The irate banging on doors began,
shouting and screaming.
"Turn it Off", "Turn it Off", "Stop"
The phone and all the mobiles
around the house rang.
The alarm went off.
The kids were screaming
We alone, all blown,
must atone, condone,
Siri's slip up.
I descried a ghostlike glimpse,
of steel breath on blunt mirror,
as my taut brain mulled scars,
from fractal bleak life motif,
zooming over skewed glass,
reflections glum and forlorn,
black ink eye ring capture,
shadow, shade, or shield,
brittle convex, abject cog,
whoa, my frail image riven
Buoyant pneuma projects,
stuck on screen mimicry,
impact ray remedial dent,
on jumpy jitter edge twin,
shaft between rotated a plus,
my geometric bent wavelength,
mere focal countenance,
epoch elapsed pier gaper,
morphing current field of view,
behind hollow sphere’s mask
Silver, aluminium, gold metal,
counterpart to my snapback,
curved aspect to visual plane,
optical illusion now infinite,
refurbish bone-weary scraps,
as sinistral dextral frontispiece,
august neck crane of aperture,
green speck tunnel sighting,
a trick of the light axial ploy,
prism dispersing faux rainbow
Jagged shard bias plummet,
obsidian or shinning copper,
glint and glare bounce factor,
mirror varnish vandalised,
leafy quatrefoil resemblance,
harsh hallucinating peep,
stiff lens on prior passage,
when aghast, shrill alarm,
might re-echo or resonate,
with latent shock imprint
Acoustic wobbled surface,
noise returns sunny splatter,
merriment exuberant audible,
etched in sonic brush strokes,
interstitial dual facade,
splits a gleam diffuse,
watch my smirk refract,
is that mirror cracked?
off its alloy succour,
stone hearted crop
Rent beads amass,
one shrunken clone,
me in smithereens,
asides a plethora,
fraught mien on exhibit
to them
I simply ran out of the hotel screaming
hallucinating, in search of anyone
I was so sure that one strange human, one human, one stranger
would understand
this is how I looked to them
to me
I was searching for my truth
digging for answers, stretching myself to embrace peace
to them
I left myself in pieces
to me I was searching for my truth
peaking up to see grey clouds with hints of blue sky and remnants of warm sunshine
searching for my truth
peaking over
to see him smiling at me
praying
that he is praying for me
praying
for my happiness
praying
that the pouring rain will drench me
clean
preying on his knowledge,
his wisdom,
my uncertainty
I am cleansed.
and honestly, I was out of my mind
when I ran out of that hotel - screaming that night
wish three.
Since a young age,
I've learned how to see
beyond the darkness -
but what has become of me?
Surrounded by blackness
and eerie silence,
gasping for air,
I can't move,
feeling lifeless and helpless.
What is happening to me -
is this paralysis of sleep
or a lucid nightmare.
Cramped for space
placed in a horizontal rectangle -
I can't feel my heart beat.
I'm afraid to close my eyes,
because then, no one will rescue me
maybe it's better if I fall asleep.
It's getting cold,
I can hear raindrops -
or is it my mother's tears.
I try to scream for her,
but the tongue is silent.
Am I hallucinating
or are they my father's hands
help me dad, help me...
Simple Musing
17 October 2020
Wanted to leave this poem open to interpretation.
CHICKENPOX HIGH
I caught chicken pox from
My son,
Oh what fun!
I was thirty five and spots,
Enveloped me from each hair follicle
On my head,
Right down to in between every toe,
I had to stay in bed!
My thesis for my Honours degree
In Sociology
Was due in a week’s time,
I had a raging temperature, and
Floating quite high,
Hallucinating I was about to climb,
The Peloponnese,
I got to the top with such ease!
My spots were itching and
Driving me mad,
But knew if I scratched them,
I would scar,
And in my delirious state,
Thought, how could I then become,
A superstar!
I applied tons of calamine lotion,
Gently, for the genie in my dream,
Whispered seductively it was a love potion!
A mermaid beckoned me to follow,
Her,
Which I did, and was joined by Garfield,
Whose purr,
I could distinctly hear,
And who stared at me grinning from
Ear to ear!
Even Asterix paid me a visit,
And we went to a rock concert,
Together, we both got in with only,
One ticket!
In my feverish state I was confused,
Who was who,
Garfield, Asterix I groaned,
I have a thesis to finish!
They handed me a completed piece
Of work that was half in French and half
In English.
The following day I began to feel better,
And completed my thesis,
For my honours degree,
In Sociology.
I Passed and graduated, and in my
Dream that same night,
Acknowledged that all three,
Of us graduated together in this
Frantic plight.
Thanks guys,
The next morning I woke up,
Teary eyed!
I landed among feathered creatures who pecked at my legs
Glad I was to have metallic bands to cushion me
Take me to your leader I said; someone ran out and cut its head off
It ran around but it had stopped clucking
I feared they might get my head too, so I ran off.
The next group of strangers I found were tall molting things
Dried bits of red, orange, and brown things landed on my head.
I tried to talk to them, but they ignored me.
There were mushy squishy things at their feet.
I ate them and began hallucinating.
This is not the place for our new colony.
The two-leggeds have eyes, but no mouths.
They wear cloths on the bottom of their faces,
As far as I can see there are no chins.
We need to find a different place for our colony.
A place where rioters are not running around screaming.
A place where guns are not killing wildlife “for sport”.
This is a planet for the deranged. Beam me up Commander.
All top hats and class,
like the gentleman who knows
how to throw you against a wall;
Words so cordial
but hand him a guitar
and everything comes unhinged;
Leaving you hallucinating
on that beautiful scream;
He’s never less than firewater;
Pure fire water;
Stealing the sound echoing in your head,
Grabbing you
like he’s kissing your hand;
Right before fracturing your jaw again;
All suave with a perfect touch
like the gentleman who knows too much,
and how to dance;
No need for any kind of buzz
He’s already firewater;
Pure firewater;
Baby, just hand him that guitar;
He’ll take you where you want to go
He’s the matchstick, detonate delicately;
He’s never less than firewater,
Pure firewater.
After a long day at work
I acknowledge
The tiring thoughts
Without actually thinking
“What if
I just went away
Found someone else
To live my life for me?”
“Who even cares
About what I do
Who I am
What I will become?”
I hear the phone ring
Walking over to the phone
I see a flash of a person
Outside
“Great
Now you are
Hallucinating”
I think
I pick up the phone
“Hello?”
Only static
I put the phone down
I hear a knock at the door
Clearly not thinking well
I go and open the door
Terrified of what I see
It’s me
But Not
Same
Hair
Clothes
Shoes
Dog
But there’s
Something
Off
I see about her
Those Eyes
Instead of my eyes
Green like grapes
I see
Those Eyes
Red like blood
Like the clash of Christmas
Between our eyes
Slamming the door shut
Locking it twice
The phone rings again
I go to it
Trying to call
Everyone
Anyone
One number works
“I would suggest
Not to scream
When I come
Back”
Now I know
That I shouldn’t
Have thought
Those thoughts
Those Thoughts
That cost me
Everything
Anything
I now watch as
Me but not me
Goes to work
Everyday
But I don’t leave
I don’t know how people
Don’t see
Those Eyes
Those Eyes
Of
Me
ME