Long Blighter Poems
Long Blighter Poems. Below are the most popular long Blighter by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Blighter poems by poem length and keyword.
I went to the DMV office the other day
For, I received an urgent notice of traffic violation
That came promptly to me as a text message
For me to take immediate resolution action.
I was told there again about repeated offence
And the amount of money I had to pay as fine
Being a very careful driver I expressed wonder
If the vehicle involved was really mine.
I checked the vehicle number once again
Verified from the employee the owner’s name
Told the man the vehicle didn’t belong to me
Unknowingly, I was made a party in a cheating game.
This bloke, a cheat didn’t use his mobile number
Instead he entered mine in his vehicle’s record
I told DMV man I was harassed for mistaken identity
For, to pay the fine maybe the blighter couldn’t afford.
____________________
February 10, 2022
Contest : DMV Poetry
Sponsored by : Matt Caliri
If John (or Jane), a spouse (or bike) can bring butt pain
and some fools in pursuit of mere bliss think both tools.
Most fighters win rounds (one or two). But do they fight to win (for you)?
Some might say I’m a blighter. Still, new bikes are lighter!
There are good wines that age, but the best wine IS vintage.
If courtesy’s a subtle art, integrity’s its dearest part!
Life (flat out) can mean bugs in your eye, though you fly!
Ride uphill grants a clearer view; this world’s not you!
Krakatoa Kritic #007
My poem is more a humorous comment on the human tendency toward
revisionism (I hope) than a criticism of John’s sly original poem with its twist.
This light-hearted free verse rates a ‘10!’ I enjoyed it, John, though I prefer rhymes!
See ‘Together for the Long Ride,’ a poem by John Watt on PoetrySoup.com.
Ninja Spider
Spying a spider on my wall
your not staying there - no never at all
with rolled up paper intent to squish
I tip toe over quietly shoosh shoosh shish
Approaching the spider grew it much bigger
I was ready to strike but spider was quicker
it moved and turned I swear to confront me
making me squeal - felt such a ninny
Did I imagine or was right did I see?
the spider raise up four legs at me
like boxers ready to start a new round
spider poised to knock me to ground
Surprised I step back bewildered and stunned
rubbing eyes blurry, to see two not just the one
Shaking my head and puff out my chest
lets see who is going to win this big test
Paper slams down, the blighter did jump
flying toward me and what felt like a thump
I scream like a sissy my arms thrash away
look down on the floor there it did lay
I raise my foot high ready to stamp
spider fast spinning, powers its amps
eight legs coiled to spring an attack
frantically moving - I'm out of here Jack!
Glanced in the mirror made my head spin
the spider was now on one of my chins
arms wildly thrashing in lunatic style
slapping my face for a short while
Eyes down, eyes up, eyes side to side
little ninja had decided to hide
then suddenly from out of the blue
came down its string web swinging it moves
Ninja with eight legs was kicking at me
hitting my nose brought me down on my knees
I swear I heard it scream eee - aarrr- eee
but then again that might of been me
Web spun round me tighter than Scrooge
spider won with all his ninja moves
ok, you win, you can live here with me
ninja spider and beaten, little old me.
04.09.20
My Garden Colonised
In spring, I worked so very hard
To make a garden of my yard
I planted seedlings, but alas
A hoard of pests arrived en masse
From all the pests a plant can host
I really hate the greenfly most
I wash him off with soapy suds
And still the blighter chews my buds
Then there’s our friend, the sneaky snail
Who leaves behind a silver trail
To show the world where he has been
But leaves no seedling to be seen
Then yesterday as I peruse
Behind the dust bin, out of use,
a nest of ants had made their home
And how those fellows love to roam
While leaning on my spade I thought
How all my work had come to nought
Should I just slab the whole damn thing
But then….
I’d miss the dawn of spring.
King Edward The VIIIth, pitiable blighter, abdicated the throne.
He had the hots for an American divorcee - this the Brits would not condone!
He was King for a spell and the paramours continued their torrid romance.
They later wed, he was busted to Duke of Windsor and they settled in France.
Wallis Simpson was middle-class but knew how to climb the social rungs.
She was twice divorced which triggered a legion of wagging tongues.
They met at Lady Furness's digs and Wallie thought Eddie not all that sexy,
But they wed incurring upon The Archbishop of Canterbury a case of apoplexy!
Entry for Carolyn Devonshire's "Clerihew Couples For Valentines Day" Contest
(10 January 2019)
I think I have a grem/in, lurking in my words
I'd left a win/ow open and thought it was the birds
But then I heard a thud and a cry for he/p
Saw the little blighter, the elf upon the shelf.
He got very hungry, some letters he did eat
Put slashes where the letters were, do / admit defeat
It was for a contest, no time to put it right
hope that when its judged ,'twi/l be the dark of night.
Oh well I'll send it off, I've got nowt to lose
Meanwhile I'll write another if / can find my muse
That elf upon the she/f has caused me some grief
Never would I have had him down as a letter thief.
(a rhyme but some of the letters have been eaten away and replaced with forward slashes by a wicked elf)
Written 3rd October
For muschi/f contes/ sponsored by N/na Parment/r.
Come closer ears
Come closer hearts
I'll whisper as the lie departs
My lips
Will pout
My eyes will scan
The room surveyed as truthless
Scam
Devours with teeth
Pointed and sharper
Than gracious softness when truth
Doth scarper
The vampire bite
Without reflection
To veer your soul in wrong
Direction
Don't tell. It's just
Twixt you and me
No harm intended just..
Promise me
This won't be shared
I want the best
To pass this reputation
Test
Is all I want
In secret though
No credit please or
Angel glow
You understand?
Knowledge is power
For all will know within
The hour
So here's the thing
Fingers on lips
For God forbid my conscience
Slips
Or slides around
On muddy moral Holy ground
With gasping tales that will
Astound
So bring that shell-like
A little tighter..
So truth can be strangled -
The little blighter
We'll choke out justice
Grab honesty's throat
Thus fictional fabrication
Promote
And by the time the dawn arrives
You'll be absolved of all the lies
At least
In part
I must now leave you here
My dear
With your blackened heart's
Redemption fear
Before you blame me
For deception..
Perhaps look closely
For your own reflection
(Mwahahaa)
Snakes are crawling behind my eyes,
My tongue is forked in twine lines.
A bleeding alien rues across my skin,
I feel possessed, it's deep within.
My fingers crack as bones revolt,
Crawling through ashes in leaden vault.
The raging heart within me, is not my own.
It's a fake, an intruder, made of stone.
I woke one day with a freezing chest,
Cold ashes lay where breath once slept.
I let something in, late last night.
When stoned by cactus, with claw-like bite.
Yeah, I let it in ....
Yeah, I let it in ....
Now I'm done with it,
I'm really done, done-dust wasted!
I gotta shake this blighter out.
Get it out, get it out!
What I meant to say is scrubbed.
Written over to mean, over-dubbed.
You know that I'd never say that.
It's not me, that's a'wearing the hat!
Eyes still mine, are not true blue.
Can't you see, they're some alien hue.
Can't you see the worms crawling round.
Making them roll and rock, look down.
I'm an empty shell, feeling the break-in!
The thing is squirming under my skin.
Come on! Stab me - with wooden stake!
Gotta' shake this baby out, for heaven's sake!
Yeah, I let it in ....
Yeah, I let it in ....
Now I'm done with it,
I'm really done, done-dust wasted!
I gotta shake this blighter out.
Get it out, get it out!
I do not see the poem yet I tried to post last night.
Is it too soon? The why's not clear, I feel emerging fright,
and I'm here blushing in the wings! Will curtain find its part,
an audience know love verse sings, mood synthesized by heart?
Is there some test I need to pass, a path I must repent,
a God to pray to? I'm so crass! I've virtue left not spent
to bridge the gaps in life's extremes? I'll bet I've gone too far;
what creds I had now flushed with dreams! My brain is so bizarre!
November 2020
PS: I believe that a 'blighter' can be either male or female. I've
certainly seen men who look buxom, and both 'Species' can be
cute, funny, shapely, political, and poetic, so my title feels like it
is more or less androgynous.
But if recent politics has taught me anything, it is that the inverse of
the old saw is probably more accurate than the original ever was,
i.e., "Time heals all wounds!"
It was on a Monday morning that the gasman said he’d call
I waited in all day – he didn’t come at all
Irate I phoned the company and they said they’d guarantee
He would arrive on Wednesday he’d be there by half past three
But Wednesday came and went and still he didn’t come
I phone up again – oh he has an abscess on his bum
Could I be at home on Friday – this time he won't be late
I guarantee he’ll be at your door prompt at half past eight
On Friday I sat and waited and the blighter didn’t arrive
I’ve sent them a bill for my time – I want it paid by half past five!
Jan Allison
8th August 2014