Long Bleach Poems

Limericks VII - Naughty, Bawdy, Risque, Absurd

There continue to be modern sequels of the famous "Nantucket" limericks, including this bawdy one of mine:

There was a lewd whore from Nantucket
who intended to pee in a bucket;
but...

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Athenian Epitaphs II

These are ancient Greek epitaphs for lost family and friends, including dogs and other animals ...

Now his voice is prisoned in the silent pathways of the night: 
his owner's faithful Maltese... 
but will...

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Doggerel II: Doggerel about Doggerel, or, More Nonsense Verse

The Board
by Michael R. Burch

Accessible rhyme is never good.
The penalty is understood:
soft titters from dark board rooms where
the businessmen paste on their hair
and, Walter Mitties, woo the...

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I used to slit my arms open like I was peeling fruit—careful, slow, watching the skin give way like wet paper. The box cutter blade was dull, sticky from God knows what—maybe dried glue, maybe...

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There must have been several of these incidents
Occurring in towns and cities all over the country
From month to month and from year to year
But to experience one at such a close range
Was enough to cause...

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Ever  so  ornamental                       
       ...

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I. a dark awakening

Shuddering awake feeling the freezing cold fingers still around my throat, struggling to catch my breath struggling to focus.

Finding my air. Shaking myself awake, shaking fragments of dreams from my mind, imagery...

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New draft Zimbabwe’s 




Tribute Documentary Zimbabwe’s Forgotten Children


Mama will be left behind when I die
I’m too sick to survive
My education was put to an end
When papa had no more to spend
We walk over sewage water
And...

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Kerry Ann gleamed with undeterred joy and twinkled in anticipation

It was her birthday and as a true Sagittarius she had colourful vision 

And a sharp bow for shooting the moon to get closer to serious...

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The Great Falls of the northern Plains is actually a chain of five seperate waterfalls
varying in height and majesty extending over 12 miles,
they also confirm that the right river was chosen,
we had hoped that the...

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Sung to, You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch, (extended version).
KP

You’re a monster, Donny Dump.
Some biiig-time twiiisted clooown.
To no end, I could deride you,
are no depths you didn’t fall to,
no ineptness could elude you,
the bottom-feeders they...

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Ability to defecate wildly swings (both ways)...
between incontinence and constipation

Irritable bowel syndrome i.e.
the former excretory bout I address
the above (polite way to phrase diarrhea)
and avoid moon efficient cheekiness,
yours truly doth buttress,
a literal warranted pain in...

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An age old tradition has gone viral in the sky, Santa is moving around in his three piece gown carrying I don’t know what in his burnt out sleigh;   gift I supposed? Three...

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Some days I wake up 
Brush my teeth with anxiety 
And braid my hair with pain
There are days I chafe at my dark skin
As insults burn holes in my heart as I walk in
The school...

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The oldest citizen of Soup Creek, Nopaul E. Ticks, posed to show his support for the town council's ban on politicians.

I hear that nasty Trump feller, wants to stump in Soup Creek.
He wrote to Mayor...

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              The Night Soil Man

			I

		Nothing sticks to-get-her like turds
             ...

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Yeah I got PokeBalls to catch Goals
I'm like Ash Ketchum when he Throws
Cause Ash Catch Em Bold I'm like Pidgeotto when my wings Flow
Look at the the light around me like Pikachu 
With a forcefield...

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"I watch the bathwater drain"
says Tonight Alive with powerful refrain  
stepping out of a bleach bath to hide from her pain
Hesitating, she turns the water back on, her self esteem slain
as she waits for...

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Mopping up the dirty floor,
Worry off my mind, I say no more 
I was going through some tough turns 
I watch the bleach and water as it churns 
Singing made-up songs as I do work...

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I can already hear the whispers
Before I open the door
Walking down the corridor
Fluorescent lights beam down
Illuminating, my faults
                 ...

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Can we share some words?
Maybe that seems to be your test,
The relevance of your beauty spreads fire all over me instead.
It tells a marvelous story about nature to which I think is the best.
Anytime you...

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10/20/19
"Playing For Keeps"

What the bleep is up with all the creeps
And cheats
It's time to release the beast off the leash
And have a feast
Sinking my teeth
Into each, until they cease

Left out to rot, not buried beneath
The...

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My flag is not black n white with a blue streak 
My flag is not a field of white stars n scars of machine guns
My flag is not the fat face of a demagogue
Orange, pale,...

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These are my English translations of poems and epigrams by the ancient Greek poet Callimachus aka Kallimachos. His surviving poems come from various sources including the Greek Anthology and the Garland of Meleager. The epigrams...

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She wore pineapple rings for glasses
and walked like jelly dances
I didn't rate her chances
She used to wee standing up
she cooked lemon a'la duck
won the lottery, grumbled what bad luck
like a surgical nip, without the tuck.
She'd...

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