Long Anus Poems
Long Anus Poems. Below are the most popular long Anus by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Anus poems by poem length and keyword.
Hey you!
Yeah, you.
Know what I plan to do?
I’ll spread Vaseline all over your windshield
And Krazy Glue your wipers in place.
I’ll insert sewing needles, point up,
Into your driver’s seat cushion.
I’ll put dog poop in your air vents
And a dead fish in the bottom of your glove box.
I'll write your cell phone number and email address
On restroom walls at truck stops and sleazy taverns.
I’ll scatter thumbtacks on the shag carpet
On your side of the bed and spit curses into your pillow case.
I’ll fill your shoes with menthol shaving gel.
I’ll smear anchovy paste on the crotch of all of your panties
and put them neatly back in your drawer.
I’ll mix pubic hairs in with your tuna salad,
Dissolve laxatives and sleeping pills in your split pea soup,
Replace your mouthwash with Windex,
Scratch my anus with your toothbrush,
Piss in your bottle of scotch and then...
And then I’ll start to get nasty.
Trust me.
I’m just getting warmed up.
Have another scotch.
-Come in! the landlady ordered me
From the apartment building
In the Habsburg Quarter, Madrid.
It's a shame to waste
That magnificent ******** of yours.
-No rush, I replied.
I'm going to be your horse
And you my mare.
I went in, I saw her lying on a bed
Naked and with her ass raised
On a cushion made of books
All about erotic literature.
I was a little scared
When I saw her Mount of Venus all covered
In yellow and white
Because she had just been ed
By a street sweeper from the Plaza Mayor.
I ejaculated on the threshold of her
And then I started to urinate
On her lips
So I could discover her ******** and slit.
-Don't bother, I told her
When she tried to grab a sponge
From a bucket of water
That was next to the headboard.
-I'll do this!
I thoroughly cleaned her
From which I saw sperm emerge
Running invitingly
Towards her anus and the crest of her mons pubis.
Once it was well cleaned
Of tartar and dried buds
Of used es and testicles
I opened her slit putting my whole mouth inside
All the way to the roof of the mouth
Of her .
-Oh! To eat all of her mons pubis
Hair and all
Without any qualms
It was my true passion.
What I wanted most!"
-I'm going to have your for a snack now
I told her.
-You're the one having snacks
You son of a , she replied.
With her l fluids
My catarrhal sputum mingled with hers
And with my long tongue
I made her Fallopian tubes ring
Because I heard a moan inside
That made her stick out her tongue.
-hy don't you take me with you? she asked.
Was your snack sweet?
Will you come back?
I answered her sulkily:
-It wasn't sweet. It was ing !
Sister Filomena's ******** was sweeter
When, while at the Seminary
I enjoyed her in the kitchen
With her and for her
Until I realized
That it wasn't made of flesh but of plastic
Bought from a street vendor
On Desengaño Street
Beside Gran Vía.
VIRGIN
Virginity made a promise to always remain a virgin
It’s all pride and dignity; so careful, least all will cave in
She got the deep well locked; not even her fingers can go in
She describes it all as homage to morality and the sixth law
Ignorant of any canal knowledge of man; she doesn’t know the excitement there is to cum
She is keeping to the doctrine that maintains that all should keep their virginity
Virginity is virtue we heard; all we witness now is lack of opportunity
Many claim to be virgins by unbroken hymen; though their mind is all slutty
Have all and leave one; have fun but no ****.
She has not known a man but sure sucked the little man
The boy is a virgin but has got his fingers impersonating the little man
He swears to be a virgin that hasn’t holed a girl but busy making the hole with his hand
He has no carnal knowledge of a lady; but knows how to make his little man stand
He is still a virgin but serves his anus to man as a ****
It’s funny that the young nun is sucking her own breast and fingering her own ****
The church is her smokescreen alibi; broadcasting the virtue in virginity
Virginity is dead; has no value and shows no integrity
The contemporary time has forgotten if any value was ever attached to that word
This is clearer than the Babylonians hand-writing on the wall; no need for a visionary
Crystal said clear! Virginity lost its virginity; just another word in the dictionary...
Lordvip
August,2013.
less than twenty four hours after dashing off a poem
explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis,
a bowel movement wherein waste unable to expel
from the anus of this guy
which bout with rectal obstruction
found me doubled over
with lower abdominal distress
whereby comfort found me unable to lie
down nor sit upright (with back padded with pillows
against the cellar brick wall),
thus severe bloating a bonus well nigh
and managed to muster the means to bare
frigid arctic vortex aire to purchase
the Acme brand Metamucil,
which akin to drano doth ply
thru the excretory tract
supposedly loosening the stools,
which optimism (product
didst earn claim to fame) generated a sigh
if that expressed intent
to cease livingsocial would try
humph enjoining
this lvii year old married male
to cede victory
to the grim reaper, who would vie
as winner de jure
to this common fellow invoking libretto
ohm resistant understudy waste not want not
allowing, enabling and providing relief,
without successful defecation
despite the oppressive urge to bolster this uriah
heap of balled up and tuckered i.e. pooped out
five foot and ten inches of lovely bones
thence mouthing retraction
of former thought to cease existing,
though a non-bull lever
in any power broker qua mankind
relief at long last
provided posterior answered prayer
yet, this scrivener scrutinizes
his recurring pain in the ass jagged torture
and asks
a rhetorical one word question "WHY"?
The wife plays nurse Nightingale while her husband...
convalescences in sickbay
from irritable bowel syndrome,
the Flip (Wilson) side of constipation,
a disorder of the lower gastrointestinal (GI) tract,
which includes the small intestine
and large intestine (colon)
essentially a problem
with how the intestines function,
causing symptoms like abdominal cramping,
bloating, and changes in bowel habits
Any room in our
one bedroom apartment accessed
as my place of bedrest
which might find me seated
upon the commode
or lying supine on the Lazy boy
E-Z chair fully dressed
defies mine surly sour grapes
physical state where diarrhea doth erode
as if I swallowed Liquid Plumber
and complete rectal purging finessed
prior to the wife going to sleep,
she prepared me soup to goad
to withhold urge
to defecate impossible mission
I feel hard-pressed
to impose restraint
against the trademark symptom
of gaseousness finding me shell shocked
and ready to implode
laughter the best medicine,
thus yours truly doth jest
cause almost forty years shigella
contracted at July fourth Rainbow
family gathering he knowed
quite well, cuz no sooner
did sphincter muscles spasmodically
contract and expand in tandem
with anus expelled lest
I attempt to stand up
from hole in the ground
which grass grew hardy
and warrants being mowed
quite frequently hopefully
not disrupting any wild animal nest
and to think that some areas
within the webbed wide world
still lack proper sanitation,
where modern plumbing outmode
did courtesy primitive privy,
a breeding ground for
more than one disease causing pest,
now not deceived courtesy
paved yellow brick road
criss crossed with military tanks
heavily armored, tracked combat vehicles
designed for front-line warfare,
equipped with powerful guns
for direct fire
and machine guns manned
by a small number of soldiers
squabble over a spit
of land for defense cannot rest
in peace until no fighter left standing.
Her eyes are laden with drunken sleep,
Silhouetted by lank, tired hair flimsier
Than the spine of an elderly, broken night.
Tattered, it buries the horrors of night;
Braided, it creases the rows of black corn,
Sweeping swiftly south and downwards;
Ponytail ties the umbilical linking life
And skyline light.
Lissome, she traipses with no lamp,
Even when darkness confidently pitches its nightingale’s romance
To district judges seated on the kerb of the apothecary’s creed . . .
With her the night loses its potency,
Its sacredness,
Expelling flies that die out on their own willpower,
Like winged dinosaurs,
Through the age of decomposing summer.
It's all been analysed before?
The oneiric spell cast upon slow, difficult nights
When the breath smells like the anus of hell.
By the way, I drivel.
Not saliva.
Oh, no!
I drivel on about hissing nights that ought to be lonesome,
Stretched out, dark, and without rays borrowed
Earlier from a twerking twilight.
Restless nights, worn like silky cloaks, diaphanous,
Seeing through the naked veins of her sweet eyes.
Crypto Redeemer is here
Thanks to the golden votes
That the Moor
And the silver ones that the cow .
His republican and sacred fascist people
Turned into horrendous braying, stunning
He burst into the mass of the Jumento
Or the “O” of his crypto currency
And in his inauguration of power
For four years or more
In the Capitol
Taking the Nazis as a model:
Oh, he's here!
Our Crypto Redeemer is here!
They exclaimed.
To see in women, in children, young men, girls
Old men and old women
That emulation, anxiety, and haste
To bow to him
And try to kiss him boastfully
At the tip of the bud
On whose was drawn:
“America great again”
It made me want to on the opponents
Democrats who farted three times
In his honor
Outside the Capitol
In the most solemn and circumspect way.
With what mercy the good old lady
And the beautiful girls
Let a crypto coin be put
In their skin
Or in the of these young girls
In all their splendor
For the glory of the newborn
With oral bleeding after a breastfeeding
With what devotion the devout old man
And the young man from Silicon Valley
Prostrate devotees
They showed themselves serious opening their anus
So that their Crypto Redeemer
Would put a coin in them
For the glory of their undefiled hole
By sacred
Or worldly faggots
Confident of not being left sad
If he heard their farts with a roar
Cheering with care:
America great again
Long live our Crypto Redeemer
Long live! Long live!
It was so much pleasure
With which the Long live!
They exhaled repeating
Such was their contentment
That the most indifferent of nations
And the all churches excited
Winning the Crypto Redeemer
Above all beliefs
With holy devotion and zeal.
In reprimand of Donald Anus Trump
(the Grand Old Party's best and choicest loser,
who sleazed and promised us he'll “drain the swamp”),
you live up to your name for there's none cruder
than you. And you behave like a male hussy
(who'd lay your daughter because she's a blonde peach),
and chirpily urge Bush to “grab [women] by
the pussy” (on video) in no figure of speech.
How to laud you our Commander-in-Chief;
when all you do is lie, distort, and threaten
your way out of the charge that you're a thief
(and fraud with whom Lord God has yet to reckon)?
And God help those children all at the border,
now dying by your executive order!
© 2019 Ngoc M. Nguyen...All Rights Reserved.
On La Lanzada Beach, Revolta
Located in the southern Rías Baixas, Pontevedra
I dove fully clothed into the depths of the sea
Into the deepest part
To carry a small bouquet of flowers
Attached to my walking stick
To give to Disney's Little Mermaid
A souvenir from my childhood masturbation sessions.
-Leave that girl alone, she's going for water!
Neptune, god of fresh water, yelled at me
Son of Saturn and brother of Jupiter
King of the seas.
I ignored him, and he chased me with his trident
Intending to stick it up my ass.
-She's my wife Salacia, you son of a !
He shouted at me.
Salacia with salt and Venilia with the wind, her friend
Transformed into albino dolphins
Aided by nereids
Nymphs of the sea
Fresh from my loves
Dreams of a thousand colors
They came to kiss me
Who, in the water, drinking unintentionally
Reminded me of my drowning
On the beach of San Vicente de la Barquera
In Cantabria
With a conch shell like a trumpet in my mouth
So I could breathe.
When they pulled me out half-dead
On the ambulance ride
To the Torrelavega Hospital
My body was thundering from my anus
Spitting out seaweed, jellyfish
And other things from my mouth.
-Salacia, I'll never be far from you
I told her.
When I drink water
I'll look at you with yesterday's eyes.
This morning I saw you
Gliding across the sea at La Lanzada
Guided by two albino dolphins
Coming to scold me
Because I was peeing in the water
Near the beach.
How incredulous and deluded we are
That we believe ourselves to be superior beings
And we are nothing more than Platyhelminths
That celebrate the festival of the Anus
Or reproductive system
Leading a long procession
Behind a priest saying mass
Or going to a rock and rap festival
Where people sing in chorus
The delights of alcohol and marijuana
All done on the lives of innocents
Murdered and dead by warlords
Serial killers and genocidal maniacs.
These are confirmed facts
In the true history of time.
We are turbellarian platyhelminths
With bilateral symmetry
Commonly depressed
Flattened dorsoventrally
Therefore we can call ourselves
Flatworms with locomotion
Produced by mucous secretions
Or ejaculations that move
Or are dropped from above.
There are active groups:
The workers of earth and asphalt
And parasitic groups:
Political baskets with an **** opening
And pedophilic clergy with a blind anus
That sees everything
According to them
Both usually equipped
With adhesive organs (suckers)
To suck our sap and blood.
We are worms with skeletal formations
For whom only the following matter:
The genital atrium, the mouth
The epidermis, the esophagus
The pharynx, the frontal gland
The nerve ganglion, the prostate gland
The intestine, the excretory pore
The genital pore, the
The penile scrotum, the womb
The roof of the palate of the
The uterus, the ovary
Supported by the Fallopian tubes.
We Platyhelminths are
For the most part hermaphrodites
With distinct male and female genital systems
With a cephalocaudal metabolic gradient.