Lot’s wife, Noah’s wife, John’s wife.
Who invented the internet?
Don’t say Hedy Lamarr.
Name someone else.
If it was a woman, no one will care.
Not the girls in the audience?
What girls?
You know. The other half of the population.
Good grief! We should not have even given them the vote.
Next thing you know they will want to be put
into the history and science books.
Especially if it is that time of the month.
Let’s do what we can to keep them chattel.
Sounds good to me.
What finer photo that Hedy Lamarr at Christmas time?
With that luxurious black hair and those lovely blue eyes.
She is a reminder to all women to utilize your beauty and brains.
Be all that you can be and make no apologies for it.
She was so much more actually – a brilliant inventor and a spy.
She slithered from the jungle in a Vera Wang sarong
Like some wicked juju temptress with no sense of right or wrong.
I remember how it thrilled me,
Oh yeah, when she shimmied in the buff;
And that first time she let loose, I thought I’d never get enough.
She hid a wealth of smuggled goods among her cargo.
I was cornered and defenseless; she was turning on the tease.
Then she wrapped her legs around me in an anaconda squeeze.
She had something sweet to teach me,
Oh yeah, more than modesty allowed.
So I poured a gin and tonic and I let myself get plowed.
She dealt in contraband delights with no embargo.
She was primitive and deadly. I was curious and young,
Groping hesitant, yet eager, heart to heart and tongue to tongue.
I plunged headlong with abandon,
Oh yeah, off those reckless, dizzy heights,
Spinning through a swirl of colors, shooting toward a burst of lights.
I came down withered, drained, and blank like no tomorrow.
You can run a little faster, beat the bullet from the gun.
You can run a little farther, almost halfway to the sun.
But when you run from Tondelayo,
Oh yeah, Christ, her cargo weighs a ton.