Family Irony Poems

Shelly came running in with her heart on both sleeves
I am in love again! She yelled. Nothing new at Family Reunion McVees.
Shelly is always in...

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Dawn of spring brings chickens in the family way
When humans are busy gazing at the flowers,
The chickens have got their love priorities right
Instead of lazing...

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'Twas 
bit
of a joke
for most
of the folk
that had
rallied round
the town
'twas
the first
I heard
a bit absurd
so I
went and
asked around
'twas
up the
hill and
down again
until
I found
my friend
'twas
then I
learned
he too
not heard
what...

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Lee had dreamed of a woman with blue eyes.
It is only a dream! Everyone told him.
I think she is my soul mate, he said.
I am...

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he left his family to serach for diamonds
did not see him for fifty years
the next owner of his home
found the world's largest diamond mine
under the...

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My mother was talking to her friend and I was drawing fruit on an Izal toilet roll.
Only because we didn’t have any writing paper and...

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I thought good , long and hard

I even thought outside the box

I knocked on every single door 

Of those family and friends I still new

I...

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She sought out the secrets of the sinister circle
    diabolical, dainty dances of death
  where butterflies flutter, motorcycles v-v-r-r-o-o-o-o-o-m
  ...

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Cheated

Why does one child walk, 
another talk, 
while still yet another 
will say nothing
the rest of their life? 

How much loss can be endured?
How many...

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The concept of a royal family
Is such a ludicrous thing,  
Products of privileged inbreeding  
Worshipped as Queen  or king.
So, when the current...

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Good morrow merry citizens
Here’s another Brexit gain
We may have our country back
But we can’t go live in Spain.
Record numbers now
Are all giving thanks
For the almost...

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My path built from nothing 
Mere twine and sticks for constructing 
My path to success 
Leading me to be a figure in the mist.

All alone...

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I know a family that doesn't have much
  But their small abode is spotless
    You can eat off their floors

 ...

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middle aged and middle class
driving way too fast
on country lanes

drop the kid at school
group yoga then the pool 
prosecco and wealth envy over lunch

on to...

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A father's role is fraught with strain,
So much to balance, so much to maintain.
There's pressure to provide, to be strong and bold,
To be the rock...

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