I really hate Pop stars
They are like incest siblings from mars
Sleeping around with everyone
Shaving their heads for fun
If your lucky they'll expose a teet
And expose pantiless pic's on a tweet
Watch out and be careful of the whimsey
For they all are procreated by Disney
Next thing ya know
They are marshmellow treats in your cereal bowl
Beware of the antique dolls
For endorsement deals will lead them to your mall
Who should stop this travesty in our homes?
It sure as hell ain't gonna be the man who changed his name 1000 times from combs
Where is this midget known as Justin Bieber?
Off with his head with a meat cleaver!
I could gone on with the pop culture life that is a bore
But what's that you say?.... it's time for Jersey Shore!
I hate to be so hypocritical and lame
But anything a hit on MTV, so them we can't blame
Never have I ever
Told my mother-in-law she's fat
Okay, I probably have
I lied, so I'm sorry about that
I've never locked the refrigerator
When she comes to spend the night
Okay, you know I did
I even unscrewed the light
I've never said she's ugly
With that mole between her eyes
Okay, she is though
She needs to wear a desguise
I've never called her sasquatch
With hair all over the place
I got her a razor for Christmas
You should have seen her face
I've never put her in the paper
For something to cut the grass
I just said she's an old ugly goat
Who's always passing gas
I've never said I hate her
But you can read what I wrote above
I didn't mentioned hate one time
But you notice I didn't mention love
(sorry, Tirzah, I could not do a nice long poem on horses.
I just felt like doing some silly limericks playing off expressions
for horses. Thanks for the inspiration!)
I Hate that Horse
There’s a horse that I so hate to see,
And at night sometimes he visits me.
His attack to my thigh
Makes me think I might die.
That Charly Horse acts horribly!
Horses Have Ears, Ya Know
“I could eat a horse!” hungry bob said
To his friends as he rode his horse, Ned.
Taking it the wrong way,
Ned reared up with a “neigh!”
Bob fell off and got kicked in the head.
Pony Up
“Pony up,” said the seamstress in town
With the new bride’s hand-sewn beaded gown.
But having no dough,
The bride cast her eyes low,
Saying, “Sorry, but my pony is down.”
In Our One Horse Town
We love ostriches. Haven’t you heard?
Yes, it’s true, and I give you my word
Just one old mare lives here.
Had no foals; she is *****.
So each cowboy just rides a bird!
For Tirzah's "A Horse is a Horse of Course" contest
I hate it when it’s cold outside
I hate it when its chilly
In wintertime it’s hard to find
My precious little Willy
He slinks away to somewhere warm
And finds some place to hide
So long as it is cosy
He will snuggle up inside
Most mornings when we have a walk
He’ll shudder and he’ll shake
But should he spot a puddle
Then his little legs will quake
He stands stock still and will not move
The silly little pup
He will not budge a single inch
I have to pick him up
I love my little Willy and
It’s nice when he’s around
But, whenever it is cold out
He is nowhere to be found
Sometimes I think of getting
A dog that’s big and hairy
Until I do it’s sad but true
I’m lumbered with this fairy
Sticky ropes
Not so dope
I hate my spiderphobia
Hairy 8's
Not my cake
I hate these sticky webs
Sting of death
I prefer crystal meth
I hate those many legs
Its so funny how spiders
Are my enemies,but are so clever
Not like them bees
Slamming into a window next to me
Not its luck:
"Bzzzz... Puck Puck Puck Puck-"
*Squish*
I hate you even more-er now
No I hate you mostest
You slimy evil fat arsed cow
That’s why I keep you closest
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