Funny Fantasy Poems

The things I have to put up with because of you humans
How would you like it if you didn't get cleaned , every day I...

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Why Is it I take you anywhere you want to go , but you refuse to wash me
You leave me out in the cold all...

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Asleep in the bottom drawer
A place I now call home
I hear a voice call my name
"Sockie, Sockie" where are you 

I am here
I seem to...

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Tír na nÓg - A Tragic Epic Saga

ye hear, of a leprechaun and a unicorn who met in a field’s corner
a he and she, she...

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sculptured hobo of the sea
a pirate’s swashbuckling adventure
siren, kraken, leviathan
or some other ocean creature
but now enjoying retirement
as peaceful a garden feature


...

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noop
boo troon
frooing soon

noop
too woon
drooing hoon

noop
shoo shoo
oon


...

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I could never really understand
Why some women
Won’t give me the time of day
And seem to look the other way
Or I feel like I’m being hunted
And...

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Every wonder where they come from?
I’m just glad that I still have some.
Sometimes they’re pleasant and seem good,
sometimes vague and misunderstood.

At times they’re funny or...

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Beware the young bastard that was birthed here by sin,
The silver haired boy beneath large piles of bricks...

Beware, beware, the young boy named Cage.
Beware, beware,...

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He said he was Herbert Buttery
Born and bred in Woodley Edge
And was owner of a little business
Repurposing outdated  artificial legs.
They were a family of...

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He chase’s girls most of the day, only their sweetness will he obey 

His mind is focused on getting a girl, surely he’ll give her...

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crone control your dragon dragging it's claw
crone your claw dragging too… dragons two
both of you, yes, you anger it's fire to flame
crone soothe your dragon...

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The witches are flying tonight,
so funny to see 'em in flight:
all sat on a broom,
so really no room,
I guess they are holding on tight.

But now...

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Love made me high
Then when it did die
Made me cry
Thought love was there to stay
But it is just a game people play
Promises made to be...

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I've heard about the arrival of fanciful fushia strangers
but I've no fear of them and not worried about dangers.
They seem a bit nonsensical; funny the...

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