A summer bawdy or humorous limerick Poetry Contest
Tania Kitchin
My summer dress is a wee bit too short
I'm drawing aggressive stares of all sort
Men with their catcalls
And their big eyeballs
I thanked my dry cleaner for the distort
A sad Sunday
Waking up to another Sunday morning
a woolly morning that does not even have the sense to rain
The day is just hanging like a dirty blanket
That should have been sent to the dry cleaner, as it is full of snot and spots
of unknow origins
Cold feet on the kitchen floor, cold cheese in the fridge, the butter
It's as hard as rocks. This morning is pointless, like an unwanted day invented
by an evil mind
No, I will go to bed again and not get up before sunlight
shines in my eyes
a french word
that doesn't
translate
in italian
neither
nor
spanish for words
so mazzo di
fiori or ramo
de flores
oddly
even
mean a bouquet
of flowers but
since its our
wedding
day
it
can only mean
love as we
hand in
hand
step
out
of the chapel pelted
by eco friendly
bird seed
instead
of rice
but
without a car they
have tied empty
clanking cans
to our feet
and spray
painted
just married on my
tux and her now
soiled white
pure gown
wishing
us
luck
so very
sorry but
thank you so
very much to the
dry cleaner toe tagging
yellow
and the
number of
both our birth
dates only to be
picked up when and
with
our
first
born
Needs dry cleaner
With electric iron
To make it pretty
1)I've visited Pool Halls at least 100 times, and I ain't yet found a pool there. I got
so disgusted, I stopped carrying my bathingsuit around.
2)My girlfriend sent me an Afghan, but I don't speak his language. Her note said
he was supposed to keep me warm, but I couldn't use him for that- he smelled
kind'a funky.
3)Affidavit- When David pissed me off and I was out to get him.
4)Commercial Bank- A bank primarily concerned with safely storing TV
commercials.
5)Congo- What happens when a prison inmate escapes.
6)Commodore- An entranceway covered with a grammatical symbol.
7)Kinetic- A blood sucking insect attached to the skin of a relative.
8)Kinship- My uncle's yacht that I'm not allowed on.
9)New Delhi- A start-up delicatessen.
10)Wimp Van Wrinkle- A dry-cleaner who is abused by his wife.
11)Tally Ho- A pimp takes inventory.
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