It sprang upon me,
a clawed metaphor
not anything real,
but a shaggy crypto-beast.
Hand picked alliterations
scatter like litter.
Then the seductive purr
the mannered modes, the manicured forms
those deftly obvious diphthongs
that like spoor, lead to more -
the unmistakable reek of
a force-fed poem
The first step they say is recognition,
the second step is to admit
a laryngeal contrivance.
The third step is to clean up
without complaint,
when it poops all over the page.
Categories:
diphthongs, poetry,
Form: Free verse
I solemnly propose thirty seconds,
As it isn’t at all a search for diamonds
And hasn’t been delivering stronger, bonds:
Only pleasure-soaked “Ohs” and excited diphthongs
Almost always depleting a womanizer’s funds,
Wherefore intercourse should be a little longer than a cock’s
Or the time it normally consumes to put on ones socks...
Perhaps the time it takes a grenadier
To dive for cover after a throw
Or for the grudging handshake between a lack lustre brigadier
And a junior officer of more decorations and glow!
Preferably, the time it takes a cock
To perform its roles of a professional time announcer
Or the uninvited, not hard like a rock,
To be forcibly shown the door by a bouncer.
Categories:
diphthongs, abortion, best friend, birthday,
Form: Rhyme
It sprang upon me,
a clawed metaphor
not anything real,
but a shaggy crypto-beast.
Then the seductive purr
the mannered modes, the manicured forms
those deftly obvious diphthongs
that like spoor, lead to more -
the unmistakable reek of
a force-fed poem
The first step they say is recognition,
the second step, is to admit
a laryngeal contrivance.
The third step is to clean up
without complaint,
when it craps all over the page.
Categories:
diphthongs, poetry,
Form: Blank verse
A Syllable is the sound of a vowel
Created when pronouncing a word
Tanka’s require you to count them
At first this seems quite absurd
These non-rhyming poems are written
To challenge and test your skill
At first they seem quite simple
But they’ll certainly test your will
Once your poem has been drafted
Count your syllables again, and again
Remember the ancient formula
Because Tanka’s are unique in this game
Subtract any silent vowels
Like ‘e’ at the end of a word
Then source any hidden diphthongs
That’s when two vowels make one, when heard
Now you realise the difficulty
Of compiling such a simple verse
Writing a Tanka poem
Is more complex than you once thought at first
Categories:
diphthongs, humor, poems, word play,
Form: Rhyme
We'll start from the beginning
A little bit of Ah and Awe
Sound out the consequential consonants
Speak low? Speak up!
Don't forget to roll your R's!
First verbs in present tension
Know your diphthongs and declensions
Vocabulary, adjectives, et, ad nauseam
That doesn't sound right
Did you forget to roll your R's?
Soon we practice in the forum
Painting words with such decorum
Past to present, transitive to direct objects
I object to this torture
Now don't forget to roll your R's..
Are we fluent yet? What?
No you can't give up on the Ovid just yet!
This is ridiculous, why not take Spanish instead of her mother
Good thing you can roll your R's
------------
This might not fall under Didactic...but I wasn't entirely sure. I'm not an expert.
This is kinda how I feel while taking Latin lessons.
Categories:
diphthongs, language, silly,
Form: Didactic