Chumps Poems | Examples

List of Member Poems

Premium Member The Electorate is Fed Up

   
                 Why is Congress infected with socialism
                      which only creates division and schism 

                  Seems to me it’s 'cos Congress just rolls over, plays possum
                      to forked-tongue liars like Obama, Biden and Trump 

                  The electorate is finally fed up with representatives who won’t fight
                      against emperors without clothes like the aforementioned chumps

                   So now they’re voting for charlatans who shout, yell and scream
                       ~ hard-core commies who'll kill forever the American Dream

Trumped and Thumped



Tangerine tan man masterplan such chumps

Plumps to rain down bombs on Iranian clumps

Logic stumps as facts and pacts again dumps 


Throat lumps as fossil fool fuel prices jumps 

Getting trumped and thumped at the pumps

Oil barons gloat gazumps.. economy slumps


No cargo due to embargo everything flumps

Even a MAGA fan is now down in the dumps

Grumps got the hump with Mar a Lago frumps 

Thicker than Forrest Gump deadlier than mumps

High Noon Last Chance Saloon


Do or die got to perform in the eye of the storm

Noise from the boys remember we did deport

Another loss 3 nought a new boss will be sought 

The depravity of gravity the reality of this sport

Big Ben’s men finally hold court our Last Resort


Insult beaten twice has the Bazball loon cult lost its spice

Starc’s legend hewn from chumps stumps in clumps strewn

Shredded in the dreaded Ashes vice Last Throw of the Dice


Bogged down in a twit pit will be flogged if we just slog

Stokes spoke about going for broke showing a bit of dog   


Aussie boon.. Over the Moon In the Clover lagoon
  
The Barmy Army will still croon their afternoon tune

As another buffoon’s marooned OZ media swoon

Sucking on their silver spoon our Last Chance Saloon

Last ditch on the pitch must bewitch this is High Noon


Tandoori or Tangerine Tan shorts no3

Don't give a jot or 

A sod this lot

On your tod..just nod

Seedier greedier leaders

Stun..Shun the Needier

Not just down trodden

Sodden...run roughshod


Beseech each of those clowns..down 

In the dumps chumps who chose

Plumps for stealthy

Leeches who teaches 

Fools at our schools

Only the wealthy can stay healthy


No education for the nation

Uses...abuses..eschews..media issues..then sues

Argy bargy - sarky malarkey ensues

Bemuses readers…forsake news as fake

It's a Maga Saga ruse for f**ks sake


No immigration...deplore integration

To restore order…close the border

Hardcore race riot diet of denigration

Likes 60's generation segregation 

Damnation not salvation..just devastation

Premium Member Money Pig

The day they proclaimed addiction to be a disease
is the day drug abuse spread like a weed.
The powers that be profit from prolonged disease
not so much from personal responsibility.
They legalized dope to keep people pacified and numb
,, then lay tax on the working man-play us for chumps.
They've turned this country from a cool place to be
into a red-hot mess, needle and syringe lining the streets. 
First Lady Reagan was right when she said, " Just say no. 
Now they have grass and gas stations in blue-tongued Colorado.

Some want to categorize obesity as a disease.
The cure for this one is simply quite easy
: shut your pie hole and start moving your feet.
There's way too much profit in treating "disease"
That's why cures occur so very rarely.
Once a person is cured, the money pig thins
it dies in the stye with the profit-margin men.

The Gulf

To visit the Gulf of America,
In case you get the notion,
You might fly over what’s now called
The Mar-a-Lago Ocean.

Be sure to click your seatbelt,
For when using this portation,
(The “trans” has been removed)
You’ll pass a bright red once-great nation.

Get your brand-new passports ready
For the agents are quite brusque
And you might just get deported
To a planet now named Musk.

What once was Mars is filled with
Crowds of migrants (oh, such noise!),
Lining up to use the bathrooms
Clearly labeled Girls or Boys.

There’s a huge arena filled with
Those with polio or mumps,
For there are no more vaccines,
Which Junior argued were for chumps.

While back on earth, the military
(Minus gays and gals)
Is patrolling Mar-a-Gaza,
Filled with Donald’s kiss-ass pals.

And in Congress, the Republicans,
With joyfulness, cavort,
Knowing that, no matter what,
They’ll have the backing of the Court.

For those of us remaining,
We can mutually mope
Or reclaim the Gulf of Mexico,
With just a thread of hope.


Premium Member Ah Nuts-Cracker

I lost the sticks
To play my drum
Missing a fist
So, yes a thumb

Still have a head
Though am real flawed
With a bent lever
That moved my jaw

Missing those things
Is a pet peeve
Since was stepped on
Last Christmas Eve

My friends have faults
Like missing poles
That used to fit
Their hands with holes

Some lost a shoe
And therefore feet
But stand there tall
To meet and greet

The team player
In red gym shorts
Though with no ball 
Still’s a good sport

The fireman’s hose
Is short a spout
But he’s ok
And doesn’t pout

A nutcracker’s job
Is standing tall
Even when broke
From alcohol

Which all began
Last Christmas Eve
When drinks were poured
By Grace and Steve

And someone said
Let’s break some nuts
Which was the launch
For those wingnuts

Coz Leo barked
Hey look up there
High on the shelf
I’ll grab a chair

Grace yelled get down
They’re for display
They don’t crack nuts
Steve joined the fray

Nutcrackers fell
Into a clump
Followed by two
Half tipsy chumps

Steve landed on
His coconut
Yet Leo got
His broken nuts

Premium Member Nonsensical Word Play

all gym op Ill chumps free caw’s paces.
ball brim bop dill thumps see jaw’s maces.
call crim cop grill pumps knee saw’s cases.
nonsensical word play is the aces!

doll dim drop shrill humps plea yaw’s places.
fall flim flop frill rumps tree slaw’s glaces.
hall him hop jill lumps dee flaw’s races.
sing song rhythm leaves graces.

enthrall limb lop bill dumps knee straw's laces
mall mim mop cill grumps lee vaw's faces
paul prim pop hill stumps wee heehaw's praces
melody keeps me jumping glaces

saul stem stop zill mumps jee gnaw’s braces
tall grim plop thrill plumps zee draw’s vasesp
wall whim whop pill frumps kee shaw’s daces
loving this poem and her traces.

Premium Member Pride Is For Chumps

Taking pride in what you do is a good thing,
As long as you don’t gloat about your success.
You should never let pride stop you from anything.
Taking the easy way out may not be for the best.

Caught Again

Come, consider his story,
People not used to fear.
He tells a tale
And we entrust him,
But he and his kind,
We simply disgust them.
Prosaic dupes,
(We’re quite the fools)
Praise God as he goes on
And on . . . 

. . . and on he tells of glory,
Battles won - in time.
Salute the flagged boxes,
There’s no disagreeing.
Trust in his word.
Praise to his being.
Dim-witted lot,
(We’re quite the fools)
Blood-letting assaults for days
And days . . . 


. . . and days transform to years,
Numb to a fall from grace.
Treacherous idols,
Allaying fears
Between each smile,
Count souvenirs.
Addlebrained chumps
(We’re quite the fools)
Selling our souls for a penny a pound.

Partisan Politics

As a person of lay,
I do watch in dismay.
All these government rubes,
look like fools on our tubes.

Playing silly games,
as you try and bring the shame,
upon this President Trump
voted in by us "chumps".

No respect for his position,
wasting time, an inquisition.

So you try to apply
allegations and lies,
to behavior they say,
was in a criminal way.

We are all quite aware
from the partisan glares,
your positions, ivory towers,
just a ploy to regain power.

From before the swearing in,
you can't stand that he did win.
So you bore us, day by day,
with these stupid games you play.

Well,
you should all hang heads ashamed,
for it's our country, that you've defamed!

The Best Ever

"Best in the League"
The Number One
Best in the World
Greatest Under the Sun
Challenged in contest
All contenders come
At you
The. Top of the list
They stay mad at you
Contenders
Buster's
And chumps
Best all around
Even when you're
In a slump
They try to up
Stage you
Messing with your head
Color you bad
If they wish
Listen
To every word you say
Keep his name out your mouth
And get pushed around
And talked about
The day you truly believe 
Is the day he'll be defeated
The challenge you receive
Be your best
To defeat him

Aye aye aye
What's that you say
Mi , my, my, my
Tell me what's that they say
Could it be, could it be
This is my day and
Trying to make a fool of me
Give you this to believe in

Deadly Magical Power

All I have to do is paint a portrait of somebody being dead and he or she dies in real life.
I've painted portraits of my former boss, my in-laws and I also painted a portrait of my wife.
I've been given a magical power but I don't know where it came from.
My killing spree is not going to end, there will be more deaths to come.
I'm going to paint portraits of Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump.
Then I'll paint portraits of the creators of the new Doctor Who TV show, I'll get rid of all of those chumps.
I'm also going to paint a portrait of a bully who I went to school with.
He'd better enjoy what time he has left because he won't have long to live.
I will never see the inside of a courtroom, I will never be tried.
If you don't want your portrait to be painted, don't get on my bad side.

Premium Member From Cheddar Cheese To Brie

I'm just a lowly cheddar cheese ball, come roll away with me
past gastronomical delights, to taste and smell and see
varieties of cheeses that stretch on across the miles
that vie for the attention of hungry cheese-o-philes!

Some are common kinds of chumps like Jack and Mozzarella
used in down home sandwich shops, or finely sliced on pizza tops.
Then there's the Italian clan for the sophisticated pallet
like Romana and Gargonzola that rank high on the cheese ballot.

European cheeses are delectable, such as Havarti and Guyere
ranging from mild to smoky rich, they have that nutty flare.
On top of the cheesy food chain are most certainly the French
who've made an art of nuance that puffs out their cheesy chests
with Blue de Basse and Camembert, they are among the best.

But the BIG cheese, queen of cheeses, is the creamy, heavenly Brie
mixed with raspberries and chocolate, it's as delightful as can be
eaten with or d'oeuvres or paired with the finest wine
no other cheese is more superb, delicious or sublime. 

And yet, some folks still prefer a lowly, cheddar cheese ball
and for them, I truly am the greatest cheese of all!





Written on 11/12/2018

Premium Member I Am

Wonderful mints, delicious cookies, my roses simply dazzle your eyes on wedding sheet cakes,
Yes, I am a baker, a mighty mighty baker, and I get up early to delight customers I make.
 
Bright entertainment, exciting melodies, lyrics that please and delight,
I am a disc jockey that plays music for the nightclub crowd, sometimes all night.
 
Whistle, thistle, butterflies and buffoons, I am the one who sleeps like good slobs.
No work for me as my elderly parents are idiots and still have their jobs.
I think what chumps they are, as they get up early, and go to work,
Buying into a system that makes me poke fun and smirk.
 
No job for me,
No job today.
I am a forty-year-old with issues,
And I like to play.

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