I still havnt found that door I should open,
The door to a future and mends what is broken,
A gateway to happiness,
A land full of dreams,
To walk through this door is everything it seems,
A passage to remember,
And not to forget,
Scarred by the trauma,
Good memories I protect,
Life is not easy,
I've seen it's cruel side,
I need to step up,
And have a bit pride,
Stand up like I mean it,
And walk through this door,
Late partner in hand,
My confidence will grow.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death, grief,
Form: Rhyme
My darkness has lifted my future looks clear,
Then one certain trigger,
My eyes shed a tear,
Then thoughts after thoughts,
It's now all out of sorts,
Remembering the cancer,
3years that she fought.
My darkness has lifted my future looks clear,
Today's been a good day,
Had nothing to fear,
Thoughts after thoughts,
Of good days we brought,
Remembering the past times,
But the futures un wrote.
So one day of darkness,
And one day it's clear,
But there is no pattern,
There's nothing comes clear,
To grieve for my loved one,
There's no right way or wrong,
My ways to write,
A poem not a song.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
I don't expect my life to be,
the same as before that's for all to see,
But I need to move on and cope with my loss,
The loss of my loved one the family boss,
Contracts and bills agreements and accounts,
I need to change names and reckon up amounts,
So many hurdles, phone calls and texts,
Ticking lifes job list ,
What will come next,
My son lost his mother That's something I'm not,
I will devote all my everything and become the job lot,
So life we move forward,
A new chapter we make,
Memories will stay with us which no one can take.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
What is my purpose,
What is my dream,
Is life meant to hurt us,
Why is my life so mean.
Life is a test,
Life is a mission,
Life has no rest,
When you've lost your ambition.
Life is 10yrs in a HMP prison,
Life is to long when a loved one is missing,
Life can have hurt,
Life can be pain,
Life ain't a cert,
Life is to blame,
My life is on hold,
My life is on ice,
My life so I'm told,
Is a roll of a dice.
Life can be fixed,
Turn your fortunes around,
You've lost your true love,
Happy memories you've found.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
What come over me today,
Really low is all I'll say,
Waking up late wrong side of bed,
That's all rubbish as it's all in my head.
It all leads back to that awful day,
My loving partner passing away,
The hurt the pain the going insane ,
It's all the mixed thoughts going on in my brain,
I've become a loner and socialising has gone,
Not mixing with others,
I'm now with no one.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
I am lost I am lonely I am hurt to the core,
My life was fantastic but now that's no more,
I've been left with a hole that no one can fill,
No woman has it all like lost love will,
I feel I've been punished,
I feel life is so wrong,
A sentence of bereavement is a punishment to strong,
I may come out stronger and deal with the pain,
But one thing for sure I can't go through this again.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
Today my life has little meaning,
The hurt of loss is what I'm feeling,
Losing my love is why I'm grieving,
The cancer that was has got me seething,
The doctors advice was misconceiving,
All the meds she was receiving,
The second scan read she was achieving,
That turned out to be deceiving.
The end was near the cancer was showing,
Unknown to us both her life slowly going,
Before I knew it my tears were flowing,
I said my goodbyes as her breath was slowing.
And then it stopped no more blowing,
My hurt for my love will always be growing,
A lot of close friends were left not knowing,
3yrs she suffered that's 3years I'm owing.
What Cheryl taught us was to honour her passing,
If she saw us fools now she would dance about laughing,
Cause this woman was tough she did no complaining,
Most people would crumble but she kept believing
Now she has left us where left with a hole,
Which can only be filled with her pain free sole.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
I dread that day the 5th of May,
my loving partner passed away,
I find it hard that she has gone,
undeserved her death was wrong,
At 42 a life cut short,
I'de double that is what I thought,
She should have reached a ripe old age,
In her book i'de miss that page,
And add it to her younger days when life was dancing on the stage,
So why did she not have a say,
On when she'd reach her final day,
What made my lovers death so sad,
Was the cervical cancer that she had,
All you ladies take your smear,
Just missing one could cost you dear,
You lose the battle,
You lose what's you,
And your dignity,
You lose that too.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
Is it about time I turned a corner,
And mix with more friends and not be a loner.
Grow with confidence push myself harder,
Nourish my body with trips to the larder.
Walk with my dog who I call Dora,
She's a French bull dog your gonna adore her.
Fill my day with plenty of action,
It's a great motivator and a helpful distraction.
Feel better in myself and people would know,
I'm back to reality with a smile and a glow.
Not to forget a past life on pause,
3years of bad trauma the probable cause.
Bringing up the horrors I saw,
The death of my partner who I miss even more.
The mother of our son and a good one at that,
But it's the time missed with him and where his life's at.
We had so much to do,
And places to see,
Grow old together and cuddle with me.
So hard to forget and realise its no more ,
I love you so much and that love will just grow.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
I wish I was a better man and lived a normal life,
It was not hard to be a gent,
And look after your wife.
I never married my partner,
like I said I would one day,
I wasn't even any good to remember her birthday.
I had it all a future jam packed with lots of cheer,
I owe all that to one great girl cause she was so sincere.
She planned all our adventures,
She never got it wrong,
Even when she was so ill she managed to stay strong.
Couped up in bed she never ceased to show her skills in planning,
Even if to ill to come she'd book a week caravaning.
It's now she's gone I find it hard to step into her shoes,
To even think of such a thing,
I know I would just lose.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
Since my partner passed away,
Life has not been good,
Maybe it's my state of mind,
To be misunderstood.
But many situations would be simply understood,
It's when you know it's where abouts,
What's the likelihood.
So many of my items have moved from where they were,
A lack of concentration,
Or a sneaky saboteur.
I don't find it funny as it happens all the more,
It really gets my blood to boil,
And causes big uproar.
Some I find weeks later,
But some don't reappear,
I also find that very strange,
If not a little *****.
Is my loving partner playing a little game,
And have a little giggle when someone else ide blame.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
I'm looking forward to have my shave,
It's not the thought of being brave,
I just feel the urge to do some good,
And hopefully help to lift my mood,
Macmillan helped through times of need,
My stories there for all to read,
They understand they help you cope,
With your life that's hit a slope ,
Macmillan nurses stay with you through the toughest times that's true,
But a charity comes with cost,
Without donations it will be lost.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
I watch as time goes by,
With no great urge to try,
To make a move,
Or break a sweat,
I'm a lost heart broken guy.
"HOW" I wonder why,
A sudden urge to cry,
I see her image,
I loose a breath,
I'm a lost heart broken guy.
When will it feel so much better,
To smile like when I first met her,
Good times and bad,
A mixed bunch that we had,
I would sooner be writing a love letter.
Memories I want to remember,
God's prayer I like to send her,
All is not good,
A mass change in mood,
The cancer is one big contender.
I can't imagine my future,
A one I live without torture,
No one for a cuddle,
No one for a date,
I've lost my true love,
My only soul mate.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
Time has gone slow and I've lost the way,
Neglecting myself even more every day,
My confidence shot,
I don't have much go,
I can't build up my energy,
And make my blood flow.
I've lost my belief,
On a future undone,
It's sad how it happened,
The loss of some one,
That some one was loved,
More than they knew,
Life now without them,
Is one I'll get through,
But I need to recover,
And look out for our son,
Fill in what is missing,
Quite simply "HIS MUM".
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
It's very strange by yourself,
In a home that meant so much,
My nights are weird I make no sense,
I'm speaking double Dutch.
What I mean ,I just can't tell,
if only my head was clear
I keep most problems too myself
It's a problem I do fear.
No wonder I feel so let down,
I thought I would cope well,
I really thought we would get through,
For my love to ring that Bell.
Categories:
cervical, bereavement, cancer, death,
Form: Rhyme
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