Food taste buddy
She turn caddie
For just a day.
Golf Cranks tried to see where his ball went on the course
The bird on his head was looking another way, his tweet hoarse
Which way did you flick it? His golf partners asked Cranks.
If I knew that it would be easier he said, not knowing their pranks.
They had given him a trick ball for his birthday, for fun.
It had disintegrated immediately as he started this run.
They finally confessed and had a laugh together too.
They are despicable friends said his golf caddie Bird Dew.
i'm not
a golfer
but i can
quietly report
on this
sport
without
knowing
any thing
that involves
my balls keeps
me very alert
and then to
combine my
wood not an
iron though
i love to putt
and put my
balls into
her cups
but i've got
to consult
with my
caddie
not that
there's
a three
some
going on
but her
sug
gestion
was just go in
and hold on to
yourself allowing
to give and get
a
bit of
a little
death
A sweet young thing named Maddie
Found her a rich sugar daddy.
"He's lousy in bed,
But after he's dead
I get his solid gold Caddie."
Premenstrual syndrome my fault,
can’t bring her crying to a halt!
No cheese in the fridge,
she whines unabridged,
then nicely says “please pass the salt”.
Told me I’m no good for daddy,
I told her I’m not his caddie,
golf course vindictive,
please one sedative,
so I hit on his wife Patty!
I do leave the toilet seat down,
but sometimes the bowl is left brown,
not my fault I poop,
please go find a scoop,
thinks she deserves to wear a crown!
Still can’t believe she is my wife,
with all the bickering and strife,
find a man better,
an Irish Setter,
no more “happy wife, happy life!”
Here's My Whine, Now Pass the Cheese - Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Phillip Garcia
Syllable Count: 8-8-5-5-8
Date Written: August 13, 2016
Graffiti on an old rusty train
I see this through my kitchen window
And globs of dripping dropping rain
A field house light shines at night like a little flame
There is a golf course beyond that mobile and decorated chain
Where established men play an old Scottish game
Electric wires above the tracks
Held up by wooden pillars
Bringing power from a building with soot covered smoke stacks
This vantage is strange to me
Who builds power station next to caddie shacks
But this is the sight that I see
T.C Minisce
9/12/2015
Caddie of Manger was incredible granger
He kept her bees in the seas of Kraken Kranger
His bees were the beasts
Fed on brewer's yeasts
Brewed beers for the bears Caddie a little skanger
Caddie of Manger/Limerick: Humor/Fun/Nonsense©Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
11/19/2014
She had a craving for something sweet
So she got herself a sugar daddy
He gave her all her desired treats
And put them in a caddie
She was his favorite candy
He called her his Sweetie
And bought her diamonds and pearls
They vacationed in Tahiti
Where turqouise waves would swirl
And she would rock his world
~~
Contest : Sweet Or Salty
Sponsor : Andrea Dietrich
LIMERICK
You can have the two kids but not the hound
And I'll need the Caddie to get around
Said she I'll take the house
You good for nothin' louse
By your cock and bull I will not be bound
HAIKU
love that drifts apart
like two diverging rivers
ne'er to flow as one
COUPLET
Their marriage made in heaven was as solid as the Rock of Gibraltar
'Til his boozing and roving eyes caused the whole affair to falter
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Placed No. 5 in PDs "Divorce Club" Contest - December 2010
I love the thrill of playing golf
Especially when it's my turn to tee off
The excitement grows as I put my putter in my hand
Not knowing how far or where the ball will land
I take my driver and I drive it home
But when I get to the hole the ball is gone
Did it end up in the water or a sand trap
Man this game is turning into crap
I yell for my caddie but he's no where around
He's in the golf cart sleeping real sound
So off to the clubhouse I go to think
But while I'm there I have myself a drink
After a glass or two of wine
I feel real good and I say the 18th hole is mine
I go back out on the green and I yell fore
But when it's over I've never seen such a bad score
I tell myself this game really sucks
So I turn in my clubs and went to play putt putt
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