How do you deal with something you didn’t think needed to be dealt with.
Something you just brushed off and ignored.
It wasn’t important.
Its okay, I’ll get over it.
Untill one day.
One moment.
It all comes back in a different light. Or darkness should I say.
You didn’t feel this way about it before.
So Why now?
Why is my heart racing?
Why am I struggling to breath???
Why don’t I feel calm anymore??…
I want to speak about it, but the words don’t seem to pass my lips.
Asif it’s stuck.
Read.
They say read others experiences see how they deal with it.
So I did..
PTSD it seems.
Makes sense.
But How do you have a brain disorder and NOT know.
Re-experience..
It’s happened before.
Why did you take me back to that place.
I know you didn’t intentionally want to make me feel like that.
It wasn’t your fault.
But yet it was.
I know you love me.
But you didn’t listen.
I said No.
Some saw him as a gifted author
Others aware but didn't bear to bother
He only cared to be there unlike his father
At first it was the worst he started to Pother
Even the air wasn't fair
For the Young scholar
He didn't dare lift a hair
As she took away his toddler
Her anti social dispair
Desperately needed a doctor
The pain he sweared
Was hell as the degrees increase much hotter
He was tired like a spare
But kept his head above water
They said on contraire
As they began to uneven the totter
He was there to declare
Yet their sins entered pins like a cotter
Wounded impaired
Held together with solder
The two were a pair
Father and son, no daughter
Indeed its not rare
That the sick pick who to slaughter
Ill leave it right there
With the thoughts caught left to wonder
Year two
A time for changing
Growing
And most of all
Speaking
Experienced in the art
Of forming words and phrases
Many were not prepared
For her verbal skill
Many sounds
No clue how to use them
Just an eager mind
And a mouth
Words as if on a map
Guiding her to more
Unknown and unexplored territory
But an unknown cause as well
Parents unaware
Of how the gears in her head worked
But someone did
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder
ADHD, the crazy brain disorder
Unable to sit and stay
Like a disobedient dog
Resisting a leash
I don’t believe her, her mother said
That is not true, her father claimed
So they took her out of the school
In disbelief and disarray
But the woman was correct
The girl was wild
At least now they had a reason
Chit chat
Squiggle and squirm
Staying still was illegal
In her rambunctious mind
Nonetheless, the girl was theirs
Their little baby
Their prize
And they couldn’t love her
Any more
This is actually a Shadorma. I wrote it in response to a review of the anthology that was done for research of the brain disorder that my son has. The review was a personal attack on me. Writing this, helped me get past it.
She slapped me
slumping sliding dumps
cascading
I'm held down
I feel like I cannot breathe
gone into hiding.
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