Best Superstore Poems

It’s dreadful, a disaster, it’s a terrible calamity
Housewives going frantic for the thing they seek but cannot see
Supermarket workers helping those who shout the most
Try their best to find a jar of spread to spread on toast

But all the angry faces glaring at the empty...

Continue reading...

I Am A Waiter

     “I am a waiter,” the man said to me,
     “ I wait in a restaurant serving luncheon and tea.”
     “I am a waiter,” I said with a sigh,
 ...

Continue reading...

PICKLE PARTY

The pickles were having a party
In the superstore one night.
The manager was home in bed
So they knew they were all right.

It was a singles party,
Each looking for a mate.
Someone to share a jar with
Until their sell-by date.

One lady pickled pepper
Immediately clicked.
She was the pickled...

Continue reading...

Schwegmann, Winn Dixie, the Superstore and more
Customer service was instilled indeed in you for sure
You hungry so you pull up in the drive thru
Welcome to McDonald's, how may I help you?

Baskins Robbins, oh so sweet
Brownie sundaes I love to eat
Easy Serve turned into Quicky's
Sometimes soda...

Continue reading...

The Frozen Turkey Incident
                   (Absolutely True Story)

       One day whilst shopping in a Superstore	
       I...

Continue reading...

King of beggars set a target for his men a stager
              You must spend 100 dollars in the Spree market I do wager
         ...

Continue reading...

Measure you may the enviro-crusader’s carbon footprint
As he globe-trots piling credits on his obese carbon profile.
Never mind, in exotic locations on eco-holiday does he relax,
Ready is he to depocket valuable dollars as carbon tax.
Lavishly he spends lucres to go green,
To erect sustainable habitat.
Is it all...

Continue reading...

The Sardine

      (How the best laid plans
      can sometimes go wrong)


     The Sardine is an unusual fish,

     It spends all its life in a tin

  ...

Continue reading...

Why are the sea gulls shopping here, if not
for "White Stag, "No Boundaries." or "Faded Glory?"
Is there some other story?  Coffee, Tea or You,
or just practicing beach and gray-sky calls
over concrete, carts, and Handicapped Blue?
This turf is for blackbirds of the piercing cry, haughty
strut...

Continue reading...

To the man who shouted at me 
One morning on my way to the gym:
‘I’d like to be like you!”

You want to be like me.
You want to be me.
To take me just like that.

You want to just go up to a superstore
And buy me right...

Continue reading...

Who has claimed 
the highest 
perch as I lurch
into the supermarket
for more inventory
to tell my story.
Sea birds roosting

on the superstore roof, 
or cruising its parking
lot: it's what they've
got, and here's the proof.
It's not their fault
they're far from salt.
We're to blame....

Continue reading...

I always considered you littered my home,
Small knickknacks adorning overcrowded shelves.
The marble statues you bought from lovely Rome,
I leave them there, a memory of ourselves.

And in gay Paris, you just went mad with joy
Those miniatures saucers, jugs and a vase,
Insisting each was her special lovely...

Continue reading...

I have to make my living on my friends
                        My enemies contribute not at all
       ...

Continue reading...

Why are the sea gulls shopping here,
if not for "White Stag, No Boundaries" or 
"Faded Glory?" Is there some other story? 
Coffee, tea, or you, or just practicing beach 
and gray-sky calls over concrete, carts
and Handicapped Blue? This turf is for blackbirds 
of the piercing...

Continue reading...

Whither the true gentleman who holds the door open for a lady
  Whither the noble scout, escorting an elderly matron 'cross the street

Whither the friendly officer who greets me as I pass him on his beat
  Whither the shopkeeper who knows my name,...

Continue reading...