Best Pram Poems
Sparkling snowflakes were falling around
Making a thick blanket on the ground
The lights on the Christmas trees
Twinkling brightly in the breeze
Carol singers sang a Christmas song
People around joined in the throng
Their lanterns casting a golden glow
Their shadows dancing in the snow
Two excited children were ready for bed
Having left food for the reindeer's and Santa to be fed
They’d left their stocking by the tree
Their eager eyes sparkled with glee
Hoping the stockings would be filled with gifts and toys
They put in their letter they’d been good girls and boys
Tommy had asked Santa for a shiny new bike
The red one in the shop was the one he would like
Ella asked for a new doll and a pram that was white
The thought of it made her eyes shine with delight
They sleepily climbed the stairs to their room
Through the curtains they saw the light of the moon
Soon they both were fast asleep
They slept so soundly there was not a peep
In the morning they bounced out of bed
Wondering if Santa and the reindeer's had been fed
Bits of straw and carrot peel lay on the hall floor
Their mouths dropped open in wonder and awe
The living room door was slightly ajar
Santa has visited on his trip from afar
Their stockings bulged with gifts and toys
Santa had kept his promise to these good girls and boys
11~23~14
Categories:
pram, christmas,
Form:
Couplet
"Love Me Or Hate Me" ~ Says the Limerick
I am only five lines written for fun
Mocking someone with foolish words of pun
Love 'em or hate 'em
You praise or condemn
A poetry form some call "hit and run"
Some think of me as inconsequential
To the haughty I am nonessential
It's a thought I refute
And would gladly dispute
Cuz nothing I say is confidential
I read Jan's limericks about Tess Tickle
But did you know Tess spent her last nickle
Buying new underwear
Cause she hadn't a spare
She kept leaking in some sort of trickle
Tess had a good friend with the name of Neve
Cheated by keeping aces up her sleeve
She thought she was smart
Until she got caught
That taught her it doesn't pay to decieve
And then there was the one they called Maisy
Made faces that caused her to look crazy
One day her eye got stuck
And she looked like a duck
So now everyone calls her Miss Daisy
There once was a gal whose name was Mary
Wore wings pretending she was a fairy
Then I swear on my word
She flapped 'em like a bird
And started singing like a canary
Heard them tell about a gal named Sally
Made money hanging out in the alley
But then she got greedy
With those who were seedy
It was curtains in her grand finale
I used to know a chesty lass named Pam
She had to tote them around in a pram
Then had an operation
A booby castration
I heard she now goes by the name of 'Sam'
Did you hear about the one called Yvette
She can't remember and started to fret
It made me want to cry
I can't figure out why
Umm.. umm.. I'm too old and tend to forget
Categories:
pram, poetry,
Form:
Limerick
The little imp bawled lustily
as it lay in its perambulator
there by the water fountain
in a secluded garden
right in the middle of a concrete jungle,
disturbing my elevated thoughts
that churned and churned inside my mind
on how to kill those pesky flies
that infested my rundown abode.
It was no use for me
to kick any brilliant idea around,
so long as that pesky brat
disturbed the silence all around.
Why even the doves stopped cooing
and other birds stopped chirping,
whilst most decided that 'twas best
to search for a quieter place.
So I walked up to his comely nurse
sitting contentedly on a bench
and scratching my unshaven face
I quite politely asked
why the little cherub cry so much!
She looked me up and down
and down and up, no doubt
disgusted by what she discerned.
"Maybe he's seeing a devil,"
she replied, cooing at the cherub
that made its bright new pram
quiver with yelping wails.
"Or maybe he's thirsty,"
scathingly I replied.
Cherub my foot, I thought.
And sighing I slowly repaired
back to my solitary bench
and thought and thought on
how I could kill those parasites
that bothered me as much
as that little cherub in the pram.
Categories:
pram, child, cry,
Form:
Free verse
In a market outdoors one day, Pam
was caught pilfering using a pram.
Fast away that lass flew
on the back of a ewe.
One might say she was then "on the lamb!"
For Brian Strand's All Yours (Jun 27) Poetry Contest
Categories:
pram, funny,
Form:
Limerick
The world in 100 years ... Oh, perish the thought
Former President, Ronald Dump, who was cryogenically frozen following his assassination after winning the ‘No Bull’ Peace Prize in December 2018, has been successfully defrosted.
Ronald Dump recently defeated his son, former President Barrrrron Van Dump, in the lunar by-election. President Dump will be taking up his forty year term at his office-in-the-round penthouse suite at ‘Lunar-Tic Towers’. This magnificent golden palace-like structure is situated on the fringes of the 29th bunker on the dark side of the moon. Naturally, it is a member’s only golf club and entry is strictly by special invitation only. It will be staffed by scantily costumed Honey-Bunny girls and models who the Dump handpicks. They will attend to every need and whim of his guests, unless he requires their expertise "handling."
President Dump will be supported by his android wife, Argenta, (humanoid model number 3060 with real hair and life-like body parts) who superseded the old model 'Milionairluva', who sadly could not be revived due to silicon and botox poisoning which ran rampantly throughout her Barbie doll body
The Lunar-Tic Towers will be totally off limits to the paparazzi so there can be no photographs taken of the Irn Bru brewing facility of his favourite drink which was banned in Scotland. He seeks to insure that no "fake news" stories are leaked by the press.
In his bid to tackle rising unemployment, currently standing at 99.6%, Dump will be advised by his new best friend and strategist, Kym Dung Hung Lo. This humanitarian almost obliterated the human race by detonating a nuclear warhead at the Dung Hung Lo Toy Factory which was caused when Dung Hung Lo threw his dolly out of the pram. So impressed by such a move, Dump hired him and invited Dung Hung Lo to be his number 2 to succeed him.
May God bless the earth, what little is left of her .. she needs all the help she can get with these two lunar tics in charge
6/1/18
100 year Contest sponsored by Brian Davey
Categories:
pram, earth, humorous, moon, political,
Form:
Narrative
It seems that saucy little girls are rather smitten,
By the playful antics of a cuddly, furry kitten!
Whether she teases it with a tantalizing feather,
Or when they take their afternoon tea together!
The long-suffering kitty must find it hard to understand,
Why it must submit to her every mortifying demand,
'Specially when she places a silly bonnet upon its head!
(It would much prefer that she'd scratch its ears instead!)
She dresses it in a frilly frock and parades it in her pram,
Swaddled in fancy blankets. Oh, what a ridiculous sham!
Most humiliating of all is seeing the inscrutable smirks,
And hearing the catty jibes of alley cats - those ordinary jerks!
She insists that it take tea with a bib tucked 'neath its chin.
For table-mates a chatty doll and scowling bear to its chagrin!
It patiently waits for its bowl of milk to be properly served.
It abhors the many social graces that must be observed!
Though it suffers through the little girl's many dreadful schemes,
It loves to snuggle among her golden curls as she dreams.
It softly purrs in her ear as its little friend goes to sleep,
Making sure that she is safe - only then does it fall asleep!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Categories:
pram, animals, childhood,
Form:
Rhyme
RIDING THE TRAIN
Catchin' the train to the city makes an interesting day
Peak hours all the workers going to earn their pay
Many nationalities all different in their own way
And then there's the trains always a delay
I silently watch as I sit alone
Many of them busy on their phones
One calls for a ride they're nearly home
Another rejects a call number unknown
An elderly couple sit near the doors
Shopping trundle in hand, out to the stores
One another they obviously adore
Weekly shopping to them is no chore
A young man with headphones sits down below
Tapping his feet to the radio
Looks like a student with a portfolio
Maybe Art he looks like Michelangelo
A middle aged woman above takes a seat
Dressed impeccably she's extremely neat
As she sits you can see her physique
Very fit but oh so petite
A group of young students are making a noise
Some other passengers it really annoys
One of them says 'Can you be quiet please Boys'
But they just get worse and increase their voice
A mum with a pram and a child in tow
Pointing through the doors at the arched rainbow
The child sits on a seat looking out the window
Mum's in a hurry but the trains' on a go slow
The end of the day and I'm heading home
A busker at the station plays his xylophone
The station manager speaks into a speaker phone
It's amazing the walks of life a train ride has shown!
Categories:
pram, day, people, travel,
Form:
Rhyme
VENT
Those 4 letters hold the key,
They’re the fundamental difference between you and me.
For you are not woman,
You are a man.
You try to fix things,
I throw toys out the pram.
No solution is needed for every problem that's made,
Offer an ear and listen to my mad tirade.
Then when I am done my peace it returns,
For venting is essential to all womanly concerns!
Categories:
pram, funny, gender, humorous,
Form:
Free verse
I remember a warm summer morning
With the sun shining bright in the sky
Its glow making stars out of specks of dust,
Floating in shadows as I walked by
To the kitchen where mum, already at toil
Was busily making fresh fare
The aroma of cakes and newly baked bread,
Permeating through the air
Big brother was at play in the garden,
Baby sister asleep in her pram
As I sat at the large kitchen table
To breakfast on warm toast and jam
When I had finished my delicious repast
I helped clear the dishes away,
Washing them clean in the Belfast sink
The like of which are sought after today
Mum put on my shoes and brushed my hair,
Then I joined big brother for play
And although years have past since I was but three
I remember as though yesterday.
Categories:
pram, childhoodbrother, brother, mum,
Form:
Rhyme
Too much of this bitching and crying
When poetry is purely about trying
Toys thrown out of the pram
Simply who gives a damn
Or is it simply lies underlying
Memories from another poetry site, hence why I'm here!
Categories:
pram, culture, inspiration, inspirational, people,
Form:
Limerick
When I was a lad about nine or ten
Summers were long school holidays great then
I played in our street we had so much fun
Me and my mates in the warm summer sun.
We felt really safe as we played in our street
We respected the bobby as he walked his beat
Cricket and football in the street we would play
My mate smashed a window we all ran away.
The girls played skipping with their hair in a bow
We would rather play fight , climb trees you know
We would play marbles and conkers make paper planes too
Me and my mates found plenty to do.
We even built a trolley using wheels from a pram
We chased all the girls they squeled as they ran
The days were so long much time to kill
I remember playing roly poly down that grassy hill.
We tried to build a raft with some oil drums tied to a big plank
We took it to the river guess what it sank
I had so much fun growing up as a lad
I was bit of a rascal but good times we all had.
Bobby is a slang word for a policeman
A trolley is like a gokart but made of wood
A conker grows on a Horse chestnut tree. You thread string through the conker stand facing
another person with one and take turns hitting each others conker until one breaks off the
string
Categories:
pram, childhood, funny
Form:
Rhyme
A little man stood at Heavens gate
with a sad look on his face.
He explained why he wished to enter
such a Hallowed place.
St Peter loosened the golden chain
and slid open the silver bar,
then listened to the story
with the big gate slightly ajar.
Please hear my tale of worldly woes
the fellow sadly said.
I ask that you not turn me away,
but grant me eternal joy instead.
When I was only nine weeks old,
I fell out of my pram,
and ever since that sorry day,
I've been in jam after jam!
I had whooping cough when I was one
and chicken pox at two.
German measles also laid me low
and once I had the Asian flu.
My legs were broke in a car crash.
My skull was cracked as well!
When there was a risk of falling,
it was always me who fell!
I've spent six years in hospitals
with many kinds of ills!
I rattle when I'm walking
cause I take so many pills!
My wife ran off with someone else.
My only son was jailed.
My wages were impounded
for promises that failed.
I fell asleep while smoking,
the consequence was dire.
The firemen got there pretty quick,
but couldn't put out the fire!
I lost twelve jobs, I lost my teeth.
I also lost my hair!
In course of time, I lost all hope
and only found despair.
Then I hit the lottery!
Three hundred thousand bucks!
The mailman found me dead from shock,
ain't that just my luck!
St Peter said "Come in my friend
and share a greater fate".
"I can't " the little man replied,
"My foot's stuck in the gate"!
His bad luck didn't end right there,
cause he heard St Peter tell,
"If you don't know how to play a harp,
you'll have to go to Hell"!
AMEN
Categories:
pram, funnyme, lost, lost, me,
Form:
Rhyme
As Women now have more power and rightly now have a voice
In the western world there are many more opportunities
Than there used to be and so much choice.
While men are today unashamedly in touch with their feminine side
And are now at last allowed to cry
Men wearing pink was just not done when I was a nipper
But now anything goes
Some men wear women's clothes make up and fluffy slippers.
Is something in the water or something in the air
But some women are getting more masculine
While men are showing touches of femininity everywhere.
Men may talk about swapping knitting patterns or tips on child care.
The girls around here have tattoos are rough and show off their bits
They have earings through their tongues and noses get drunk and aggressive
Always fighting
In pubs and the street when pints of beer touch their lips.
We now have lady vicars in lace knickers
Female body builders and bricklayers
Men have took a giant step backwards
While women race to the top
And I hope they'll never stop.
House husbands are more common these days
They can change a diaper with just one hand
And talk on the cell phone for hours while doing the housework
Or taking the baby to te park in it's pram
I think women taking over the world
And using men as slaves is the masterplan
And men live in fear because they know they can.
Of course now men have big problems
Like deciding what dress to wear
Does my bottom look big in this
And ooh I hate my hair.
It's so difficult to tell the difference sometimes
When on a date
If you're heterosexual
You may find out a bit too late.
Now it;s women who wear the trousers
And men who wear the skirt and bra
No one seems to care no more
Just who you are.
Women had been repressed by men for too long
Now they play the tune
And bang the drum and sing the song.
Well if you can't beat then join them
Before it's much too late
My operation is next Thursday I hope keep the date
Please don't look down at men
I know we are sometimes a pain
But you have to realise
Men are going through the change.
''Now pink or yellow dress,?, hmmm.
Peter Dome.copyright.2015.June.
Categories:
pram, conflict, men, power, woman,
Form:
Free verse
Reliving Upside Down
by Odin Roark
The Jungle Gym geodesic glistened,
Afternoon showers dripped,
Languorous droplets fell,
Saturating sand below,
Just like then.
Bench of parents
Reflected memories old,
Stroller wheels struggling,
Obstinate sand as obstacle,
Giggles and screeches
From canopy covered pram,
Bumpy ride for my brother,
His laughter, sheer joy.
Fathers,
Mothers,
Sitters and nannies,
Attentive to children’s every move.
So many eyes saw me
Atop the dome’s iron lattice,
Hanging by my legs,
Seeing the world upside down,
Shouting, “Look at me, Grandpa!”
He didn’t notice this day,
His sudden slumped body,
Dropped the half eaten sandwich
To the ground.
Part of me wanted not to upright my view,
That safety of abstract vision so foreign then,
So understandable now,
So strangely comforting then,
So painful now.
I now straddle atop the bars,
Thinking thirty-three years haven’t made it easier,
Save the bench now replaced
The sand succeeded by concrete,
The tenders and watchers now often of different purpose,
Staring at me not knowing
I’m anything but a nut case.
Some of us just discover
Life’s remembrances
Sometimes prophesy what is to come.
Some, like me, will realize
Their whole adult life is programmed upside down,
Its sophisticated induction lures escapees
Into free-for all playground-workplaces
Where capture so often comes by way of
Pills,
Powder,
Liquid
Needles.
I smile.
Swing down to the ground,
Throw an embrace to Grandpa’s bench,
Look up and shout…
“Reliving upside down moments of love is okay.
Really…
It’s okay.”
Categories:
pram, absence, philosophy, poetry,
Form:
Prose Poetry
Trodden down and beaten out,
That is me for you and whole of the world.
While inside me I still shout,
"Wait to see my rage unfurled".
Since long have I been messed and marred,
Raped, ravaged, killed and scavenged.
Undaunted still I have dared
To get all those wrongs avenged.
Bearing flogs on bloodstained backs,
With burning tyres around the neck.
So many times those malignant knacks
Have left me shambling, a complete wreck.
Withered soul and parched hopes,
My modesty clad only in tatters.
Around dark corners my soul gropes
To think that all this hardly matters.
You want to know who I am,
And I shall tell you in good time.
I have been robbed from grave to pram,
For neither reason nor rhyme.
When wars were fought and lives were lost,
When men decided these were needs.
My heart was caught in unthawed frost
My being collapsed under those deeds.
Hiroshima could not finish me,
Nor could any bloody apartheid.
I shall stay and forever be
And rise forever from the dead.
Changing world and changing days,
Can only hurt me and hurt me more.
But these can never mend my ways,
For I shall rise in full galore.
The planet sways under your weight,
And nature collapses under your feet.
But I conspire to keep you straight,
And cajole you to a quiet retreat.
Pained I am that you call yourselves human,
And yet carefully deign to forget me.
Yet I shall redeem the bestial and inhuman,
For I am the phoenix called 'HUMANITY'.
Categories:
pram, blessing, encouraging, faith, humanity,
Form:
Verse