Best Oinking Poems

I have a porker as a stalker; it keeps following me down the street
I cannot talk to my friends, as it keeps oinking when I try to speak

Doesn’t it have an owner it can go home to, and as leave me alone
Once; I tried to...

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The cow was playing cowbells,
Giddy Goat joined in on his guitar,
The horse was hoofing bongo drums.
Animals started coming from afar.

The chicken clucked an egg out,
Pig was oinking right in time,
Duck was tinkling on her triangle
While dog was hammering on his chime.

Pussy picked up her piccolo,
Goose...

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The Three Little Pigs


The three little pigs
Had lost their wigs
So now all the animals saw
Was three little bald wiggly pigs

They had pen and paper
Pigs writing poetry
They said oinking and inking was in their nature
We have to change the laws of the legislature

Pigs and poetry was...

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Oinking, squealing pigs
Their sounds are not mistaken
Do you think it’s because they know
Soon they’ll be chops, ham and bacon?...

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oh how they don’t like it when one of their own
turns on them,
oh how they don’t like it when he gets a gun---
oh how easily they lie when their lies are exposed &
now Mr. Dorner is dead,
just like they planned.

as parallels are made with Waco...

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There's nothing quite so graceful as a flying pig. Swooping over lands and seas. Saying hello to birds on the way. No pecking though. Just oinking. Occasionally octagonal birds can speak the dialect of oink. As avocados sleep quite peacefully below with the buffalo on...

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a nation of increasing unemployment,
severely increasing debt & corporate
greed that does not respect its employees,
treating them like disposable
cogs (to be squeezed for every drop of
blood until dead inside & then cast out
onto the sidewalk).

+

a culture of violence.

+

a ready available 
.45 caliber shotgun
&
a manhattan street
(fully equipped...

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I think that I shall never see 
A sight as strange as a flying pig .

A winged pig that snout is sky-wised pushed
Against the earth’ fantastic slopping roundness

A winged pig who may fly all day, 
And lifts whimsicality toward higher climes;

A pig that flutters in...

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old you must know I was called
I give myself twelve more years
as I never indulged the apostles
just to make sure my pup will be ready
to break an heart long gone in the desert of sahara
hanging on the edge I thrive the walk and the barking
sand...

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So yo’ farm masters
got yo’ phat attractive features
listed on public notice,
at da commodity trading display — touting you as
one fine looking hoofed creature

State Fairs have long been
4-H 401k 
good capital investment forays
Sow auctions are traditional;
if you got da right beauty parts,
you gonna be quickly sold

Now...

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the sky gets dark
wind it blows
lightening strikes
and rain it flows
hitting the ground
one drop at a time
starting to hail now
hail big as dimes
cars are flying in the air
people hiding under there
watching houses disappear
barns ripped apart like dihearra
cows are mowing
roosters try to crow
the pigs oinking with no...

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Daiya vegan non dairy cheesecake - oh yum!

Hard knocks Methacton school alum
ofttimes finds ruining his fate
while squarely planted on me bum
nevertheless felt rightly triangulated 
flashed mobbed by disheveled and unshaven, 
foo fighting beastie boys
whereby their gray stubble encrusted
wayward synonymous days old crumb -

after getting wolfed...

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Enervated and energized after cold shower
the perfect tonic to gin body though o'clock
wee hours August thirty one two thousand
nineteen - natural buzz to stave off relished
sleep, thus refueled with zest able to chop
chop thru printed material (dictionary seat

of pants newpage turner with a-z characters)
and no...

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I am beautiful he said.
His image agreed.
All proud and pink.

I am the bomb! He said.
His mother was oinking her approval
in the background.

I am going to get a lady he said.
Not with this attitude the mirror thought
But wisely kept this to herself....

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Zooming around the room in wheel chair-moves
our child greets us by his beeping toy’s cheer
allowing pets to bark and meow freely.

Gesturing to hush us midst vibrant shhh
our son mumbles his morning prayer list
murmuring our names, gasping in between.
	
Then he enjoys yummy breakfast crunches
gulping milk and...

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