Best Hygienist Poems
dentist office
the hygienist removes
my Bluetooth
Categories:
hygienist, absence
Form:
Senryu
I come in for my check up.
"Sit down and open wide."
Now the time for truth.
There is no place to hide.
He peers into my mouth,
small mirror in his hand.
Poking here and there,
the bit i cannot stand.
"Open wider please."
I mumble a reply.
picking and a prodding,
i hear the Dentist sigh.
"Not to bad this time,
your not a sweet extremist,
but you must pay a visit
to the Dental plan Hygienist.
No fillings was the plan,
though i know he has the skill.
To keep it really painless,
but i just cant stand the drill!
An appointment is then made.
To have a scale and polish.
The build up of that tarter,
will have to be demolished.
My Mother will be pleased.
She is my judge and jury.
For when it comes to teeth,
she"s the original Tooth Fury!
Categories:
hygienist, funny
Form:
Rhyme
The hygienist clucks her tongue
To get her point across.
My teeth will start to rot away
If I don't start to floss.
She pokes and prods; she sands and scrapes
And all the while she lectures.
"A sonic toothbrush you must buy"
And other such conjectures.
I listen 'cause I have no choice
But once I'm up to rinsing,
I've had enough of what she thinks
Is helpful and convincing.
In six months' time, I'll make her day,
For surely she'll be waiting
To see the likes of me again,
All set for her berating.
Categories:
hygienist, health,
Form:
Rhyme
A Dream Trip to the Dentist
By Elton Camp
In the reception room you need not stay.
It would be so wrong to cause you delay.
We take patients only one in an hour
So to keep on time is within our power
To us, “appointment” is not just a word
To waste your time is something absurd
If ever we don’t take you in on time
For our work, you don’t owe a dime.
We accept what dental policy will pay
So then you owe nothing else, no way
We think to do that is only fair
It’s so scary sitting in that chair
We have not seen any good yet
To come from building up debt
And if short on money you happen to be
We will gladly provide our services free
Come on back and have a seat
Our kind hygienist can’t be beat
So open up your mouth so wide
Let her please take a look inside
Amazed at what we now see
Everything is fine as can be
Teeth are sparking clean
Finest we have ever seen
Not a bit surprised to say
Not a sign of tooth decay
Gums are healthy and pink
From the teeth do not shrink
Teeth are so pearly white
It’s quite an amazing sight
Chip that had been there for years
Now is growing back, it appears
And for goodness sake
No need an X-ray to take
But find it would be best
Brush and floss a bit less
For you it will be dandy
Go ahead and eat candy
It’s fine on ice to chew
Return in a year or two
A firm hand gives my shoulder a shake
Wife now says, “Time for you to awake.
But, what accounts for that big smile?
Your dentist appointment is in a while.”
Categories:
hygienist, funnytime,
Form:
Rhyme
In the middle of the room stood the white metal chair
Designed to deliver the best dental care,
But she stood there immobile, unable to move
Toward the object of torture that was likely to prove
To be frightful, exhausting and life threatening too,
As the hygienist invaded her body anew.
“Let me help you.” The voice said as a hand touched her arm and
Guided her forward with arising alarm
To that monster before her with a history of pain
She had sworn to avoid and see never again.
As she sat there she knew that her pulse was increasing
While weakness expanded with blood pressure decreasing.
Her breathing grew shallow and her skin felt much colder
When a masculine hand firmly pressed on her shoulder.
“It’s alright.” Said the voice from behind the white mask.
“I’ll be gentle as this cleaning is a most simple task.”
But the eyes were uncaring, the brows dark with gloom
Providing no comfort in the sanitized room.
Large fingers penetrate as her jaw opens wide
For the scraping and picking to go on inside
With a speed and a hurry and a schedule to meet,
The hygienist leans forward while still on his seat
The pain in her jaw hit so quick and severe
And her groan brought no comfort, only increased her fear
As rough hands did their duty and worked on her teeth
Caring nothing for feelings that lay underneath.
She could hear heavy breathing as he plied with his skill
For to finish more quickly and to give her the bill.
She could do nothing else as she sat there afraid,
So she folded her hands while she silently prayed.
Categories:
hygienist, christian, faith, inspirational, prayer,
Form:
Rhyme
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
Have to go to the dentist
For my twice yearly torture session
In order to save my remaining teeth
I must endure the never ending pain
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
I must have known over 100 dentists
During my 61 years around the sun
Some were good, some were great
A few became friends
A few became enemies
All became richer
From fixing my crooked no good
very bad misbehaving evil teeth
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
All tortured me
Saying it was for my own good
To save my crooked wicked teeth
My teeth are bad
Wicked, misbehaving
Rotten to the core
And always have
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
I tried orthodontic braces
As a child
Gave it up as an adult
Did everything except implants
So many crowns
So many root canals
So many pulled teeth
And partial dentures to boot
So much dental work
My teeth are gold plated
Monuments to the dental artistry
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
A few dentists were exceptionally good
A few exceptionally bad
A few were crooks by and by
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
My current dentist is good
He keeps the chit chat down
Does not lecture me on his political views
Imagine having a dentist praise GW Bush
Or Trump taking your forced silence
As acceptance of his right wing views
Imagine a dentist talking endlessly
About her children’s latest escapade
While drilling away
Assuming you cared
When all you wanted
Was to end the torture
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
And imagine a sexy dentist
Or hygienist working away
As you think of her in bed
And can’t get that thought
Out of you head
As they drill and poke
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
Yes I have a love-hate relationship
With dentists
Can’t stand them
Can’t stand the pain
But they save my teeth
And save my smile
And so I forgive them
One and all
I have the dentist blues
I have them bad
Categories:
hygienist, health, pain,
Form:
Free verse
He is quite the constant hygienist
a licking perfectionist
shows agility with flair
back leg up in the air
my cat the self cleaning contortionist
Categories:
hygienist, cat, humor,
Form:
Limerick
The hygienist cleaned my teeth
And gave a little lecture.
"Your flossing isn't good enough;"
It wasn't just conjecture.
I'm sure that it was obvious
My efforts were exquisite
In just the week or two before
My 6-month dental visit.
I brush each morning and each night
But more than that's annoying.
Unless a poppy seed is stuck,
No floss I'll be employing.
So twice a year I suck it up
And listen to her chiding.
At least a saddle for her very
High horse I'm providing.
Categories:
hygienist, care,
Form:
Rhyme
The dentist
Left his dentures
His hygienist pulled his teeth
1-20-18
by James Edward Lee Sr.
Categories:
hygienist, adventure, confusion, how i
Form:
Senryu
Dedicated to a Dental Hygienist who cleaned my teeth while I was working at the Fair. She requested I write a poem for her and that she was related to the Hatfields and McCoys.
The most gigantic smiles can be seen on the bustling midway of a fair.
With laughter and screams of excitement, no other place can compare.
Both children and adults sitting on a piece of burlap sliding down a glimmering bright orange slide,
While in the distance, an announcer's voice rings out, please exit at the back of the ride.
The blaring of popular music comes from one of the big rides which pierces the air, mixed with the sweet smell of candy Cotton permeating the excitingly
wonderful atmosphere.
Mothers and Fathers with babies in strollers, and kids scurry all about, while ticket stands strategically dot the land.
Hobby horses go up and down, while gamers beckon people to play, the fairest wheel turns, the lights, and the feeling are ever so grand.
Such anticipation in the throngs of people eagerly waiting to get to their seats,
While a father wins a teddy for his baby, oh, the sight is ever so sweet.
Hearing so much joy, laughter, and happiness in one place of steel and wood, grass and sod,
Perhaps could only be compared to the feelings of all the angels,
Huddled round His mercy seat gazing upon the face of God.
Categories:
hygienist, america, encouraging, firework, joy,
Form:
Rhyme
Words get lodged in teeth.
A dental hygienist
has actually extracted a few.
Like bats words hang
from the roof of my mouth,
their subsonic squeaks
jiggle its epiglottis
like a witch doctor’s rattle.
The optometrist wears her glasses
over the bridge of her nose
like intimate lingerie,
she moves in seductively
fishes into my eyes;
her searching is a shadow-dance
on the back of an exposed skull.
Once her bright penlight
stumbled over a word
that should never have been out
on its own.
Immediately, a startled brain
put on thick rubber goggles,
I looked back at her like a deep sea fish,
caught unawares by a naked mermaid.
Categories:
hygienist, poetry,
Form:
Free verse
I haven’t seen the dentist
Since pre-Covid days, although
I’m finally feeling ready and
I called to tell him so.
I questioned the receptionist
If he’d received his shot.
Her answer, most evasive,
Let me know that he had not.
I told her, “Have him call me,”
Which he did and when he called,
He said he needed no vaccine,
Which had me quite appalled.
Since he had beaten Covid,
He has antibodies now.
His hygienist does as well;
To that he’d take a vow.
I thanked him for his time but
After seeing him for years,
I’ve found somebody new
Who’s vaccinated, it appears.
We all must do as we must do
So we feel safe and sound
And on this issue what I know
Is I must stand my ground.
Categories:
hygienist, how i feel,
Form:
Rhyme
Words lodge in my teeth.
My dental hygienist
has actually extracted a few.
They hang like bats
from the roof of my mouth.
Their sub-sonic squeaks
jiggle my epiglottis
like a witch doctors rattle.
My optometrist
wears her glasses like lingerie
low on the bridge of her nose.
She fishes into my eyes.
Her searching
a shadow-dance on back of my skull.
Once her bright penlight
stumbled over a word
she had never heard before.
Immediately, my brain
put on thick rubber goggles,
I looked back at her
like a deep sea fish,
caught unawares.
Categories:
hygienist, poetry,
Form:
Free verse
The crocodile smile is such a pretty sight
as the Egyptian Plover keeps his teeth
pearly white and shiny bright
"Open wide," are words heard from the bird
his dental hygienist who picks and pecks
then eats the meaty spicks and specks
and as the crocodile sheds old choppers
(no tears)
so the avian's not unemployed or at a loss
the croc constantly grows new gnashers
for his new-found feathered friend to floss
Categories:
hygienist, africa, animal, bird, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme