Best Humph Poems

Less than twenty-four hours after dashing off a poem 
   explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis, 
   a bowel movement wherein waste unable to expel 
   from the anus of this guy
which...

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During the bloom of youth, in the spring of vitality,
Everything is sparkling and has a fresh, real quality. 
Summer is the season of growth and rebirth in life, 
Every day brings fresh dreams of conquering strife.

In the fall of life, it is time to slow back,
peace of...

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I am a full figured woman
inside and out
Embracing my shape
as each curve tells her own story

My head you no longer enter
my heart you can not break
now you mad I no longer give,
SO...."ha ha" now you can no longer take

I am a full figured woman
inside and...

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Hmm...What Discursive Poetic Theme Shall I Write About...

Today (a rather brisk, chilly,
and otherwise sat
tiss factory twirly delightful
December 18th, 2018) matte
her of fact quite
refreshing noontime, while this fat

tend plot of Earthen surveyed terrain
situated over scat
herd modest suburban tract,
(actually yours truly some watt
urbanely sprawled out) at

Latitude: 40.2538...

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Shh-aaah....shh-aah, Oh how never ending is the sea..' I thought  I  should come down here
Maybe it will help my insight into this terrible event??...Oh I don't know..' you just can't 
work things/people out it seems, I have found out some strange and sad...

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Ah, Paris, is still calling me, as a romantic lover that has been the 
                 background of my dreams. Though life passes by like a falling star 
 ...

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You’re the world’s worst hiking buddy
How did we end up so muddy
Not even sure we can scrub it!

How would I know
Can’t stick my hand in that hole
I thought you had the first aid kit

Yea I dragged a little back
Put too much in my pack
Still we...

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"Come closer, you kids, let me tell you a story:
now you all see that there morning glory? Well
that was the blue of this little boy's eyes, born
right in this village; they named him Eli."

"Those eyes had lashes so black and so thick,
it sure was enough...

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The Bible Itself, Explains Itself   (2 Pet. 1: 20)
Explains It Better, Than Anyone Else
Once, It’s Taken Off The Shelf
& Explore Complete Message Left

The Bible Tells, Which Words Are Allegorical     (Rev. 1: 1)
The Bible Tells, Which Verses Are Metaphorical ...

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Playing favorites
In bed with the enemy.
Body language
speaks volumes.
you meander over
like...
"eeny meenie jipsaleenie"
to the one you
love the best.
Plop down,
like...

"ooh ahh ambaleenie"
somebody
just
got chosen
like...
"Atchie patchie goom a ratchi"
I Love You!
All the top choices
feel dejected.
Just knew;
That this person
would have surely
acknowledged them
first.

I mean, It’s a Political
gathering,
not a gay singles bar.
Anyway,...

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Ignatius Sprout pushed himself to the surface

As he was the foremost elected leader

Followers, Bamber, Gottre, Bovis and Night

were all reluctant to escape their prison

None could remember how or why they were trapped

Bamber's head popped out, flapping his long green ears

Ignatius frowned down at his friend's...

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Hey, what's up Pete? Same old stuff eh?

Alright, lemme swivel this chair around 'n you climb up here. Bout time you come in .You 
lookin' even worse than usual!
  Whatzat? Yeah well I look better on my worse day than you do on your...

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Bedlam and mayhem in the mistress's boudoir

Nsync with variations on a theme:
of drool worthy Reuben Sandwich
(consisting of corned beef, 
Swiss cheese, sauerkraut, 
Russian dressing between slices 
of rye bread that is grilled 
until the bread is crispy 
and the cheese melts)
various and sundry
pseudo lurid fictitious...

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Dragon polished his nails and admired himself in the mirror once again; a daily ritual getting so old.  The one lousy hair on his chin, protruding from a small wart which he called a, “birthmark”; warranted a razor, shaving foam and aftershave or so...

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less than twenty four hours after dashing off a poem 
   explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis, 
   a bowel movement wherein waste unable to expel 

   from the anus of this...

Continue reading...