Bedlam and Mayhem In the Mistress's Boudoir

Bedlam and mayhem in the mistress's boudoir Nsync with variations on a theme: of drool worthy Reuben Sandwich (consisting of corned beef, Swiss cheese, sauerkraut, Russian dressing between slices of rye bread that is grilled until the bread is crispy and the cheese melts) various and sundry pseudo lurid fictitious escapades mostly I did merrily wet an appetite for consummation whet madness aye ever did dream. The missus personal trappings strewn helter skelter after a hard day's night every perilous step fraught with danger field analogous riding as passenger with death cab for cutie 'course thy quasi bohemian rhapsodic Queen of denial feigns ignorance attributes hazardous condition linkedin with accident prone little lord Fauntleroy's double doppelganger, me trumpeting pet husband, her unrequited germane Liebchen willing to risk life and limb doting hand and foot as proper husbandly duties. He (ahem... me) exhibits drama whimsically visiting slapstick pantomime, especially pretending to remove sneakers pulling with all my feeble strength off little feet of wife half-heartedly struggling, (stringent rule of shoe game) lamely denouncing marriage nevertheless conveying jollity regarding marital entrapment er... rather unbridled wedded bliss constituting fits and starts enduring about two and a half dozen years. I reciprocated amorousness, whether toward MaryAnne, (his long ago coldly dismissed sagacious enchanting first paramour, (half a dozen years my senior), sported webbed wide whirled toes, whose astrological forecast accurately predicted promising acquaintanceship/relationship – tanked potential sage rubber soul mates (two plus score years ago - gone to naught), which latter aforementioned delightfully humble lass decried he fomented incessant emotional grief, he cruelly (albeit unwittingly) doled out nothing but lackluster lovelessness attributed to identical astrological zodiac signs (Capricorn) (matter of fact shared same birth date January 13th - six years age difference) and similar flat wide thumb stubborn misconstrued perception, whereby fancy free and footloose selfish nasty short brute nevertheless deemed himself undeserving of love - humph! Addeneum: Approximately four plus decades re: one quarter century after aforementioned baptismal initiation love stricken paroxysm forty fifth president of United States took (i.e. plagiarized) many pages courtesy, cruel playbook authored by Matthew Scott Harris, who left trail of heartbroken sage woman commander in chief deliberately stoked, née sparked long simmering, smoldering, and stewing long fostering white supremacist altercation fiendishly igniting racial conflagration exploding during late spring 2020. No matter no child left behind kibitzing (yours truly as boy plucked petals off daisy reciting "she loves me," "she loves me not"... cupid loosed an arrow into boyhood neighborhood sweetheart she innocently bespoke "I wanna marry you," when uttered courtesy Sherry Jones, a little girl who lived approximately three doors down along cul-de-sac within Apple Valley perpendicular to Lantern Lane, or more age apropos, when young gallivanting purported vestal virgin ladies nonverbally signalled libidinal proclamations of emancipation, as demurely expressed lest unlucky (chaste into) precocious phallic proclivity suffered the punishment of being buried alive. Now back to present day, when our old geezer, the prototype garden variety male of present poem - any resemblance between general referenced funny good fella and living persons purely coincidental. He (yours truly) easily qualified as overly cocky whippersnapper, i.e. young feisty buck and/or Casanova wannabe experienced bit torrent hormonal secretions gushed particularly in close proximity wherein wafted pheromones - think a waif faring ingénue. As evident and quite obvious, I fabricate (prevaricating my signature trademark) rather than stating bland reality stark, yet will plainly explain issue in summary essential rhyme without reason constitutes nothing more spectacular than garden variety generic pockmark excised pustule ofttimes hallmark of teenage/ pubescent pimply benchmark.