Best Gonads Poems
Oh, damn, I get it, nowhowbrownsowcow-----that it's to be accepted on this site you need to be
the FATTED cow. Low of intellect, yet high on countenance, high on payment
and low on quality! Please forgive my lowly louse langiuse as I plead my
pleb pirrah poetic case in cause $$$$ celeb. RFR? do u take up the capitalistic
crotch clause that payment is prose promised to a clueless culture climaxing in
its own caustic circumsized circus?
Such fecal findings from finger felonies, that use wish words for regal for the future rangling rights to the right rear-renderings, renditions,
thusly l navel nauseous neverthelesses negatings, awkard thimble thoughts.
Try and
get a regal rectal, sorry, reckoning of an inter-rational corporeal capacitical concept of a before u igno/after gnoi and a post graduated spiroscape initiate yours after our
psuedo poetic prowess, upon this site-------swells free of charge if u have half brain
and your wallet in awash in ego endless endeavors that u unengage in urine
intrepid word worn passages of I think I can, when u really can't sorry u suck,
and retry your gloomy gumption as to the positve **** retention given cause u r a
paid prosti soup sister,broth brother, no talent intended. Dreams given an expired
expertise that end clauses into a missed used muse of integral ignorant id
intentions. Sorry for our/your word worn wishful wisdom and not my fault that I can
crea command anall allowance of alphalbet antiques, amiable and accountable in all
annotomical acquired acquatinaces' as you try and make memorable in and of you
sorry, silly, shallow, socialized self, again
no pun intended. Ridicule not want not with not why not get not not. Prelude
your relative innane imagary and sequester your inability to that which is stiffled
well within and garb your you grievance by the gonads, look interpresent and fail
follow yourcreep mismatched mirror of what u compel that works. Call me, I'll tell u
what's what that's that, it's it, nots not and snot is snot. Go blow.
Categories:
gonads, allegory, anger, appreciation, change,
Form:
Free verse
An old scholar called Mi Balls Hung Lo
Wished he could put his gonads on show
His poor wife got quite mad
But his daughter said “Dad…
just remember to add a big bow”
By Jan Allison
Now Hung Lo was really Gung Ho.
He had his big bow now in tow.
The new goal he set
was somehow to get
little Mister Happy to grow.
By Dale Gregory Cozart
Dolly Parton said, "Hey there Hung Lo!"
"Why don't you appear on my show?"
"While we're on the air
we'll show our two pair,
It might make your wee Happy grow."
Dolly said to Lo on a dare:
"Would you show off your pair?
I'll show mine
They're very fine
but not all covered with hair!"
By Lim'rick flats aka John Wulf
Lil' Mister Happy wanted to grow
So he could become part of the show
But overshadowed a tad
by the two giant gonad
Now so sad is Mi Balls Hung Lo.
by John Gondolf
To cheer him up they took sad Mr. Hung lo
To a place for encouragement to grow
Down they did jut
A poem for each nut
Mr. happy stood up tall for the show
By Pat Adams
Just woke up to this gorgeous day
What joy, think I'll go out to play
In my skivvies I will
Oh what a thrill
Tiptoe through the tulips twittering away
By Jack Ellison (My Poetry Soup Brother)
When Mi balls hung lo joined the nomads
Something happened to his small gonads,
the further they would go
much bigger, they did grow,
So he now uses them as knee pads,
Due to drinking the milk of the Yak
his large gonads started to shrink back
the more milk he did drink
more his gonads did shrink
problem was they were turning jet black.
By Roy Pett
PLEASE SOUP MAIL ME YOUR POEM AND I WILL ADD IT TO THE COLLABORATION
10-04-17
Categories:
gonads, body, humorous,
Form:
Limerick
Don Johnson Yuan-orang
We was in Coles a shopping center,
The wild man from Borneo appeared,
He reared up an started spraying
Yuan Oranaga-Taunga was here
Followers in their blue-gum robes,
With bark a prickling round their ears,
With dollar coins attached to ear lobes,
Dodged and sidestepped as they savoured
Uric acid and sweet urea,
Holy-man was gesticulating,
Gonads flashing so sincere,
Red hairy waistcoat ever stating,
Yuan a Tanga was the seer,
Deported then he was so,
Dropped by parachute we hear,
Back to the wilds of Borneo,
Thought blinking Wombats bloody *****…
Don
Categories:
gonads, adventure,
Form:
Ballad
one seventh heaven fantasy of this middle aged hetero
sexual mwm would be to take the playbook of the late
(recently deceased) Hugh Hefner. Said reverie constitutes
servicing a gamut of women, whose plethora in numbers
constitutes insatiable sexual propensity sans propinquity
perp hussy.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
despite mine middle aged (baby boomer) mwm base line
balled (though non bald) sans truth, isle be quite Ernest
and frank to state boldly, how thine bass concupiscence
trumps ambience, dalliance, essence, fragrance, generates
hefty indulgence (je nais se quois) juice kissing libidinal
makeup nursing omnipresent phallic quintessential reverent
seduction triggers unflaggingly (leaving me starry eyed for
stripes sakes) vision watering x2c (to the x power of infinity)
yielding zesty adulterous blessed coital consummation,
delicious expeditious fulfillment, generous gentle hormonal
insouciance, judiciously kneading lusciously marvelous
natural occurring pleasance, quiescent radiance, rousing
somnambulant threnody ushers victorious waltzing X-rated
yearning zeal to take a page from the playbook of the very
recently deceased Hugh Hefner housed within the PlayBoy
mansion. Game gamines gestalt gifted gonads, gopher
Categories:
gonads, butterfly, desire, devotion, freedom,
Form:
Free verse
Anti-Poem — “The Membrane Electric”
(Poet’s Instruction: Play “Two Thousand Light Years From Home” by The Rolling Stones, while reading this anti-Poem)
susie and billy tripping into arterial los angeles
sloshing their young gonads with diet-rite cokes
riding now in his ‘72 cadillac deville on highland
susie’s in the front seat wearing a pink mini skirt
she’s swaying madly to the outrageous music
creating stardust sandwiches for the bewitched
the stones are jamming on 8-track with majesties
jamming and scratching the membrane electric
keith playing electric bass now with a mind claw
relax baby this is music from the perfume places
the bending plastic places where time oozes onward
sprinkling the silent cosmos with this gushing music
this atomic slide with mick jagger and the blues boys
brian hypnotizing death with mellotron madness
it’s so very lonely when the streets aren’t blinking
susie and billy careening now past the neon tributaries
this stunning urban interlude with handjob milkshakes
hey baby relax let’s just kick back and ride this music
this very cool mind slosh with charlie and billy too
ride easy baby as we slide into the membrane electric
yeah honey we’re two thousand light years from home
susie’s swaying now closing her eyes loving the stones
Categories:
gonads, memory, music,
Form:
Free verse
Guy in Guantanamo
Catherine’s wheel spins round the revolution ever since that day her lover died
when both lost the plot and their passion and she cried her grief into Bedlam
Guy jumped to his death to avoid torture hanging in quarters and disembowelment
gonads stuffed into his mouth like hot chestnuts did not appeal much I suppose
He had been a sparkler cracker Jack out of that ordinary box a hero martyr terrorist
criminal but one woman’s arsonist is another one’s flame hot passion crusader of love
Same smoke screens for religion and dogma today with mouldy gunpowder exchanged
for suicide bombings and some misguided faith merely faithful to death and destruction
When lighting a bonne fire today and caught on the ‘right’ side of evil trading life for
collateral damage oiling power in the name of wheel’s fortune and hegemony’s axes
Medals glory decorations await the champion wielding drone’s buttons for the sake of
remote controlled ‘democracy’ but when found reading the Koran Guantanamo beckons
Legality outsourced to Caribbean delights with water music suited for rackets and rockets
of massive destruction and Monopoly played in the board rooms of walled streets where
Playing with fire one does not hear Catherine’s pleas to have mercy without victor’s justice
and as of today I still do not know whether we celebrate Guy’s death or his disorderly guts
Effigies sizzling on feu de joie do not sit well with my statutes and statues of liberty when
hypocrisy measures with double standards and when two wrongs surrender what’s right
15th November
Categories:
gonads, devotion,
Form:
Free verse
Biological copulation draws Easter egg,
fecund gooey glommed gametes
heralding zygote
(adroit bitcoin currency)
describing extemporaneous fusion
generate hormonal influx
juices kickstarting life manifold
natural occurrence pregnancy quilts
rudimentary secrete tapestry
until vicar wizard yields
zealous adorable biological concatenation,
derivative extrapolated filigreed
Gonads heft, induce jointly knotted linkedin MineCraft
nascent occurrence
presaging quintessential reproduction, sharing third trimester,
umbilical venerated womb
yawping zee amazing baby, credit deoxyribonucleic acid,
enigma fantastically grand
husband injected jetted klatch, leaving microscopic nothings,
opportunistically pierced quarters, readied shutterfly trap,
uterus vibrantly welded
* * * * * * * * *
yoked zappa bun, cooked definitive enchilada,
formula generations hardy
induced jimmied kin, labored maternal newborn, one pricked queue,
randiness spurred testes ubiquitously, voyaged whimpering yelper
thence subjected to the royal treatment
whence reality inundates the full term offspring
upon a lifelong journey (initially as a foreigner sans in utero),
but willfulness viz life source secures survivor
against the pinging peccadilloes
learning by trial and error to iron out kinks
as one among the human league
since the modus operandi to transcend encumbrances
triggers built in impetus
to traverse poet tent shill pitfalls along
space/time continuum trajectory
which adversity only serves to net greater strength
since that instantaneous and spontaneous bitmap
encoded upon conception.
Categories:
gonads, allegory, allusion, baby, creation,
Form:
My neighbour, his name's Tu Hung Lo
His gonads he’d tie with a bow
To attract a young filly
Cos Tu’s got a small willy
One look and the ladies say NO!
In passing I happened to mention
Tu obtains a todger extension
After big surgery
Tu is very happy
And certainly stands to attention!
02/13/21
Categories:
gonads, body, humorous,
Form:
Limerick
Biological copulation draws Easter egg,
fecund gooey glommed gametes
heralding zygote
(adroit bitcoin currency)
describing extemporaneous fusion
generate hormonal influx
juices kickstarting life manifold
natural occurrence pregnancy
quilts rudimentary secrete tapestry
until vicar wizard yields
zealous adorable biological concatenation,
derivative extrapolated filigreed
Gonads heft, induce jointly knotted linkedin
MineCraft nascent occurrence
presaging quintessential reproduction,
sharing third trimester,
umbilical venerated womb
yawping zee amazing baby,
credit deoxyribonucleic acid,
enigma fantastically grand
husband injected jetted klatch,
leaving microscopic nothings,
opportunistically pierced quarters,
readied shutterfly trap, uterus vibrantly welded
* * * * * * * * *
yoked zappa bun,
cooked definitive enchilada,
formula generations hardy
induced jimmied kin,
labored maternal newborn,
one pricked queue,
randiness spurred testes ubiquitously,
voyaged whimpering yelper
thence subjected to the royal treatment
whence reality inundates
the full term offspring
upon a lifelong journey
(initially as a foreigner sans in utero),
but willfulness viz life source
secures survivor against pinging peccadilloes
learning by trial and error to iron out kinks
as one among the human league
since the modus operandi to transcend
encumbrances triggers built in impetus
to traverse poet tent shill pitfalls
along the space/time continuum trajectory
which adversity only serves to net greater strength
since that instantaneous and spontaneous bitmap
encoded upon conception.
????**Hey there!**?? ??
Categories:
gonads, angel, child, family, joy,
Form:
Narrative
You Suppose To Be My Friend
For you I let the door to the deepest dungeon of my soul open
Yet you went around chanting my faults like a retard anchorperson
Raising your rank by selling me cheap
For popularity is this how low you steep?
You said you would stand with me till the end
You suppose to be my friend.
You weren't lying when you said you had my back
You just didn't mention my spine was suppose to crack
Like being massaged with broken bottles and sand paper
I found my heart buried in sand and cut with paper
Instead of lending me one, you disfigured my hand
You suppose to be my friend.
You suppose to break the jaws of those who backbite me
Yet I found the teeth from your jaws on my back biting
I feel I have lost there's no point fighting
My eyes fail when I look into yours, your ghoulishness blinds me
I'm laying six feet under still breathing yet covered with sand from your bare hands
You suppose to be my friend.
You chomped the gonads to our friendship friend
You were more of a tourist than a friend
Toured me through a paradise that led to deadman's land
Dead bodies all over with missing limbs in the deserted land
Due to the friend that said "I have your back give me your hand"
And I thought you were my friend...
You suppose to be my friend.
Categories:
gonads, anger, betrayal, change, conflict,
Form:
Couplet
Her hubby was found with a bimbo
He's naked, her legs were akimbo
Can’t deny the fact
He’s caught in the act
His marriage now is in limbo
Wife’s livid - he’s dressed in a trice
She'd clamp his gonads in a vice!
He’s been playing away
Now there’s hell to play
No cheating would be my advice!
It’s time his wife showed him the door
He’s bonked other ladies before
So it’s not the first time
That he’s cheated, the swine
Unfaithfulness partners abhor!
3/7/19
Categories:
gonads, lust,
Form:
Limerick
watching people go by
footprints of carelessness on my existence
two pancake corndogs, two hot dog specials, and a fruitopia
plasma donation money, wet hiking boots, and tired legs from endless walking
metabolism and starvation....images of homemade cheese grits and a bacon and cheese omelette with mushrooms
at the library constantly looking at cookbook pictures
imagining the way i will eat the art on every page
swallowing my saliva mixed with phlegm and pretending
my gonads are even shaking and yearning for nourishment
my legs are damn near jelly and i suddenly break out in a strange type of sweat
thoughts all over the place till abstract insanity
my eyes are bouncing balls devoid of real world time
....as i watch people go by....living life like regular with no hint of inflated flatulence
Categories:
gonads, remember,
Form:
Free verse
I've watched this bum that some call President - Commander In Chief,
He made dozens of promises during his first campaign and none he did keep,
Promised "CHANGE" on a grand scale and has only made this country worse,
And if you carefully look at his overall record can only be described as
perverse,
War, terrorist plane crashes and illegal aliens by the train loads break our
laws,
While this pompous fool flies the USA collecting funds for his empty lying
cause,
This arrogant man is a flat out disgrace to both his White and African heritage,
When confronted with facing his rivals this no gonads leader cowers in his
cage,
Imprisoned by an overblown ego thinking he can simply ignore his
counterparts,
A failure in so many ways it boggles a mind how so many voters had no
smarts,
Electing for the second time a low IQ Harvard graduate fooling lots of old
farts,
So please Lord deliver us all from this despot before our freedom departs.
Copyright 2014 Robert William Gruhn A.R.R.
Categories:
gonads, leadership, lost,
Form:
Dramatic Verse
"50 Words for Poe: Winter"
Hey, you know how it goes
when you had your first kiss
Poetry kind of gets you between
the gonads with that kinda shizz
Yep, you’re lost on the swell when it
hits that frizz
You just gotta hit the surf and
when the waves come for you
dive under the Effers
You’ll come out of the Lemonade, betya 10 quids
Head up, you’re King or Queen of the Waves
This is how "IT" begins
Sharks, bellies full of sunk brave
are there to awaken
"Kavorka"
Byron knew that biz
"Kavorka"
Poetry in Bliss
Go on
Deal those cards
Black Jack
No Pikers
Never pass this way again
It’s Now or Never
We’re ALL heading towards Winter
(LadyLabyrinth/2019)
https://youtu.be/MKAC7t0P65o
Steely Dan...
"One always has to be willing to lose to be able to win... in battle and in life.”
Categories:
gonads, adventure, fun, games,
Form:
Romanticism
why dont you go eat Sardines?
Stupid coupe, Cupid poop
dandalion wine, hmmm...
century's past
AProved uh by uh me
Hidden, Stricken, Chicken, Picken
my el camino..., blast OFF!
Sad And blue
bruiser
chosen by Lester (AKA The melester)
whats the deal with carnivores and gonads? (like Seinfeld)
Partionally everything
Feeler's And Grinders
The Quick And Deadly
Almost like an Alien
check the perimeter
Nothing ma'am.
They wanna be like Shotgun holders and shiiitt
girl, that's right.
what is Project implant zero? (like jeopardy)
Die living
Single Parent, Apparently Single
weight Watchers
introducing Air
you coulda guessed it
Romance with you, Grander than the heavens
my outlook is my Disease
Disaster Relief
ill teach you lines and colors
Kurt Cobain
smoke bombs and tazers
Run around in circles till you puke ( NO WAY )
what i say is Gone
Laying down all night thinking.
Jingle in
yeah, big Air
intruding fools ( i was one of them)
u no who im talkn bout miss thaang
if your reading this your eyes are open
123Floor
456Seven
8910Friend
it happend once, itll never happen again.
wierd timing
however ODD, it ws Shortly lived.
Categories:
gonads, mystery,
Form: