Best Gluttons Poems

For jimmy so loved bacon,
That he gave his only begotten cholesterol count,
That whosoever believeth they shall take his bacon,
Shall perish and enter the afterlife!
Amen

*for the "Show me the Funny" contest!*...

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It shouldn't come as a surprise,
That gluttony is on the rise, 
When TV 's are turned back on just after Sunrise,
To watch batter for Yorkshire pudding in the oven to rise.

Yet I wonder if it is all that wise,
For yet more cooking shows to devise,
When...

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My stomach bit me,
Crying: how long will 
you starve us?:
Won't you feed us?.

Then been considerate,
Took i may soles,
treading toward the kitchen,
Picked the yam's pride
Baked and stayed it awhile.
And then i considered them;
even i fed them.

... Then they became more hungry,
biting and chewing blasphemes...

Then said I:...

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Veracious vanity about victories over 
veils shows vain values corrupted by 
vicious volatile villains in hopes for 
votive to vindicate, 
Grossly gluttons gain grains over 
gloomy groups of ghastly greiven gulls,
Foreign fighting by ferocious foes gets 
fulfilled here by fat-headed fools 
fulminating for their unknowing...

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