Best Felon Poems
There once was a man who was a felon
Who had just stolen a watermelon
But when he swallowed a seed
A little girl decreed
I think maybe your belly is swellin'
When we retired we were so inspired:
To live free and rest from our labors.
This mobile home park has lived up to the mark,
But oh, goodness gracious, the neighbors.
Jay the old peeper can snoop through the creeper
And tell if the ladies are bathing.
At times he's been caught and the women have taught
him new curse words in language quite scathing.
Denny got back from the hoosegow and that
is the end of his meth lab's production.
He'll have to report to the man from the court
with his pee to avoid re-induction.
Jen basks in the sun and we all see her bum
Though we tell her it's not necessary.
In England alone she's seventeen stone
And her armpits are ever so hairy.
A lady name Myrtle we call snapping turtle
(You never know when she'll attack you)
keeps her trailer quite clean but she's viciously mean
And if talked to she'll snap right back at you.
There are neighbors with tone, who have made themselves known
And we're so glad to know they reside here,
But an odd PhD and a master's degree
Can't compete with the felons that bide here.
They are eating the dogs
They are eating the cats
They are eating the pets
They are eating the wild hogs.
In the early 20th “c”, Germans used to eat blockade mutton
That’s absolute truth. It’s a shame that this felon
Is desperate and going wild. The dude is a pathological liar
Who will do anything. He’s a tremendous cheater.
Immigrants do not eat the pets
Especially Haitians who love chickens
Tassot or griot meats, black rice and beans.
Haitians love Soup Joumou with lots of carrots
Haitians enjoy one of the best cuisines on the planet
Liar, liar, nobody is perfect. That’s correct.
Copyright © October 2024, Hébert Logerie, All rights reserved.
Hébert Logerie is the author of numerous collections of poetry.
Detested humanity
Dejected you are
Your felony descries the felon you are
Enjoyed bloodshed
A sadist you are
Your sadism descries the felon you are
Murdered innocent
A killer you are
Your butchery descries the felon you are
Burned several
A pyromaniac you are
Your deed descries the felon you are
You fear no god
An atheist you are
Your disbelief descries the felon you are
You make me cry
A brute you are
May god help you for the felon you are
If you Google ‘a convicted felon’
You’ll find the name of a person
Who’s rich, popular and flamboyant
You’ll see his original mug shot
Ladies and gentlemen, believe it or not
As we speak, this felon is dying to be president
Again, again, in order to avoid jail time
As we know, if one is convicted of a serious crime
One must obviously be arrested to do the time
To pay for the criminal ills done against society
Brothers and sisters, normally, once one is found guilty
Of so many counts, one is handcuffed immediately
And incarcerated to pay for the odious crime
Such conviction is punishable by at least
On year in prison and countless restrictions
Including the loss of civil rights are on the list
So far this person is treated differently: no actions
Are imminent. This convicted felon is still free to roam
The streets, the cities, the states and the Nation
Like he is untouchable
Like he is irreproachable
And many wonder and ponder: When will he go to prison?
P.S. This poem is dedicated to all innocent people who are now sitting in jail.
All wrongfully convicted individuals must be released immediately.
Copyright © September 2024, Hébert Logerie, All rights reserved.
Hébert Logerie is the author of numerous books of poetry
Dear Jayne,
Of course I'll go with thee,
Upon the train to Coventry,
Make sure of good boots on your feet,
And meet me Sunday at New Street,
I'll get your ticket for I've a pass,
I think we'll do it second class,
It isn't far and well besides,
My wage wont run to first class rides,
So on the stopping train we'll go,
It takes but half an hour or so,
And yes of course when we arrive,
I'll walk with thee to Tanners Drive,
And wait until your meetings done,
And maybe then a little fun?
I know a pub by the cathedral,
Its called the Heron and the Seagull,
Do a smashing Sunday roast,
A friend of mine the smashing host,
And after that a little walk?
And if you'd like, a quiet talk?
You know, about that thing I asked,
The thing that left you all aghast?
But as you've written me from prison,
I'm hoping, praying I'm forgiven,
Or does my being by your side,
Depend on things at Tanners Drive?
Well, anyway, I'm glad your free,
Or least you will be Saturday,
You've done your time and served your dues,
I'll leave you now with more good news,
The tests I had were all benign,
Of deadly things there is no sign,
So on we go, I hope together,
See you Sunday, yours forever,
James.
He sounded like. "Behave!”
Out with the first light of the morn.
It glared, In dozens!
This is a different time, a new season
These days, crimes seem to pay
For a multitude of obvious reasons
As we all know by now, this is another day
Full of surprises, felons don’t go to prisons
They have top-notch official protection
Twenty four hours a day, this is truly insane
It won’t be easy for the prosecutor to nail
This perpetrator who is as slick as a sultry snail
He knows how to accelerate like a thief in the fast lane
The prosecutor has his work cut out for him. Gender
Does not matter, since justice has no boundaries
We simply have to watch carefully the technicalities
Stand by to follow the next move or the next procedure
This is a new season; this is obviously a different time
Let’s wait and see what happens in primetime; a crime
Is taking place somewhere. I hope that the criminal is caught
Red-handed in the jelly jar. This dude has done plenty, a lot
Of transgressions to sail him off to jail for the rest of his life
All the evidence suggests he’s guilty. We hope that his wife
Will appear in court this time. Prosecutors don’t lose easily
Let’s stay tuned for another episode, another day of comedy.
Copyright © July 2024, Hébert Logerie, All rights reserved.
Hébert Logerie is the author of several poetry collections.
Recently thought of robbing a bank
If caught, I'll just call it a wee prank
If cops don't allow
Put me in the hoosegow
I'll make friends with a felon and break ranks
It tells a lot about Prez Trump,
Long shall US carry this lump
And long shall show the scar--
Long as lives Polar Star,
A burden on its back as hump.
Yet, it also tells us a lot:
Its pillars stand on righteous spot,
That, its top court can be
Firm as to disagree
With who so has White House well fought.
_______________________
Happenings |19.01.2025| USA, political
Poet’s Note: Notwithstanding what this ditty says, one might believe, Trump will have to endure embarrassment of being a felon as president. Unlikely alas. He will not only own it, but brag about it. Most likely, both him and the courts will be tested in future.
He’s a very famous shell-man.
Who thought he was coated with teflon.
Can a narcissist be taught a lesson?
By him, the prosecutor and judge were threatened,
could the legal system withstand his aggression?
Yeah, his guilt was proven beyond question,
and now a 34-time convicted felon.
What’s he going to tell poor little Barron?
I doubt the judge will send him to prison,
but there are still some outstanding questions.
Like will his followers shake their obsession?
Will craven Republicans still nominate him?
like taunted tiger
seeped'n saucy anger
felon fury fostered
fiery feelings triggered
callous claws smirk
dripping lanky lurch
saucy silhouette scribbled
with whooshing wiggle
naive cubs cobbled
as rustling rage
smite tainted trace
intruder felon phrase
same, salient emotions
strap squishy combustions.
'20:02:17:15:44
*Felon Feast Fall*
will be done
zeal tumultuously torn
felon tiers' turn
vile voluptuous verge
cuss be curse
pruning pulsing purse
faith be bait
fate, tactic trait
twain tracking trail
callous crest chittering
luminescent lust leering
spent passion puking
gollible groups growl
felon feast fall.
19:12:16:08:00
dark dearth dribbled
crunching cloned cripples:
hoisted hay forlorn
perforating pulpy pawn
punctured pills pored
gaunt gifts gored
nocturnal nature tamed
leering lanky lame
kaleidoscopic chaos craved
meagre missiles moaned
munching mufti robe
rusty rhythm poked
yearning yucks yelled
fuming felon flesh.
'20:05:04:20:07
Note: Of numbed nature.
Once upon a time
Behold the stream of everlasting dote
The fiddle and a young stag
Cute, happy, naive young love
Happiness lighten their infinite world
Hidden deep in those pages of memories
Prompt the deed sad wound
Covered with a rosy smile
Even with the blissome past days
Comfort were never felt
Life become the hardest to live
As the felon become dark
The eyes, chico they never lie
He became her sickness
But silence was the best she could give
as days went by
heart became the betrayal
As her wrath world lies within him
The past always win
It becomes her sickness even when she has no weakness
Yarning for the old memories
no words are sent to say 'hello'
Love walks away slowly over
For months they haven't spoken
Will the beautiful night be killed with silence?
More days paved sorrow disguise in joy garmet
For, the beauty tears can wash a country eer
There is no point in trying
He died decades ago
Day after day; she tried, oh so many a try
But will the flame of love be quiet forever?