Best Dastard Poems

On the pathway to the flames of hell, I stand; 
in inky blackness of night, 
with giggles of demons sounding close at hand. 

I march to the beat of Satan's dastard band; 
submit without a fight. 
On the pathway to the flames of hell, I...

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'Twas long before a Shakespeare play was quilled,
the fifth and sixth of deadly sins would prey
then dance with pride as innocence was spilled
upon the pyre where dastard evil plays.
The wicked toil around their witch's brew
of lies perceived as truths among their ilk
to spill the sloppy...

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CLERIHEW REVIEW

Sir Isaac Newton 
Though genetically close to an Orang Utan
With his larger cranial cavity 
He discovered the law of gravity

Atilla the Hun
Was a man who liked innocent fun
After a day of rape and pillage 
He played cricket for his village

King William the Conqueror
Breeding not...

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Retirement
Poem
Lionel Derbyshire

Stop working now
The boss was hopeless
Gave you no hope
The nine-to-five grind
Is over now
Retirement
Exit, exit excite
Up, up away
Banjo your mango
Man goes
Peddle your medal
On your salad day
Now is not the time
To join the navy
The prospects look good
And plum the perks are
Light up the shadows of your...

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WHO was the dastard - Moriarty again?
WHAT was the reason for kidnapping Watson, my friend?
WHEN did Moriarty strike?
WHERE could Watson be?
WHY is Moriarty always instigating dastardly deeds?



5-W's contest
Seventh Place...

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One light, I was out panting the clown red when I met a Sadie from Francis who I found to be quiet subtractive. It was apparel she thought I was distracted two because she ted, “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir?” To witch I supplied...

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Patriot's Play Scheme 

Should I make love or leave well enough alone?
Even though may be young teen or fully grown;
My decision, what things will it be affected by?
Nothing works out no matter how hard I try.

My life bottomed out and became abysmal,
Yet I will struggle...

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,It's like some long lost fairy tale 
That's handed down through time
But couldn't be, as you will see
For this strange tale is mine.

I chose to take a country road 
I do from time to time
To enjoy the crisp cool English day
Then later a choice wine.

I...

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The silence of morn makes this place forlorn
in the fields, the hillsides, and trenches.
Over two hundred years since the bloodshed and fear,
yet you can hear the yells, smell the stenches.
The crush of the blue, charging straight and true
at the redcoats behind all their breast-works,
The bayonets...

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I think I shall - oh yes, I shall
put you to words in books, et al
and share my scoundrel’s rationale
with those of impish-like morale
but pray you beg me love -
your coquette kiss, thereof …

       (oh yes, I think I...

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November 10 , 2014 2:30 pm
I see a little darken shadow of my complexion skin.
I afraid a shady cold heart white currish man treating me like a helpless *****.
My rituals and rights is my fight I stand .
The currish white man sees me like an...

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This is a palandromic poem.  That is, it reads exactly the same backwards (letter by letter including the title) ignoring spaces and punctuation.

Resumes Reversed
I sat in unity—tied am I!
Evil I saw is alive, here reviled.
As a witness, eyes/irises sold I maybe keep. Oh drat!
Sad...

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(The British Medical Council want to ban smoking in private cars, even when the driver is on his own.)


suspended sentence for beating his wife
just a sad fact of modern day life
and then the dastard really went too far
got six months for smoking in his car...

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“Glory! Great honour shall be mine!
Wenestl shall be last of his dastard line!
Sword unsheathed and bow taut-strung,
We rest not while a Norvajael stays unhung!”

Over glen and trail the quaver spread;
The Ilken sought sheaths of hapless dead!
Seething, as one our spirited gunari rose
To take upon glittering...

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Mourn
Oh I fear the Death of love!
For you to snatch away,
the very people hold so dear,
take me instead you beast.

Afraid of salted tears that wound,
the memories bleed astray.
Let go your grip you dastard Death!
Take someone else instead.

Oh I fear you’ll come for them too soon!
Then...

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