Best Colonoscopy Poems

I stepped in for my first colonoscopy. I was nervous everyone could see
I had a choice to be awake or put out if I was...

Read more of this work...

I went to the hospital and they said they were going to shove a camera up my ass.
I told them that I didn't want that...

Read more of this work...

Not sure if this would be consider taboo
To even mention the view
Did I just hear her say the word touche 
When the doctor proceeded to...

Read more of this work...

After 50 -  states a well known belief
Your colon can cause you some grief.
        To get it...

Read more of this work...

I feel I have appendicitis,
Or a bad case of bursitis,
And I think I need another tonsillectomy.
I'm sure I got a staph infection
From a tetanus injection
While...

Read more of this work...

I once was one twenty, now I’m two fifty three
I’m twice the man that I used to be
I gave up smoking because they said it...

Read more of this work...

A serial of haikus, all addressing the same topic with 
a hint of humor; but advice that could save your life
or that of a loved...

Read more of this work...

It’s time for my next colonoscopy
Oh, how I dread the cost to me.
Must I drink all that stuff?
Wouldn’t a pint be enough?
I fear my insides...

Read more of this work...

He's scheduled for a colonoscopy 
Commode will soon fill with allotropy
Only clear liquid diet
This soon will be a riot
Six wipes sent by a person who's...

Read more of this work...

Have you had your colonoscopy?
Your mammogram? Or hey – 
Your stress test? Blood work? Body scan?
Get on it right away!

If you cannot relate to this,
Just...

Read more of this work...

G;Geico commercials   B;(you knew this was coming); Billy Mays commercials U; 
hour long imfomercials
G;Big, juicy homemade hamburgers  B;White Castle belly burners
G; Best...

Read more of this work...

Now that I'm in my 50's and over the hill,
I'm getting more and more medical mail,
lots of it pertaining to a certain ailment,
this one being...

Read more of this work...

If you can't afford a doctor, go to an airport.
You'll get a free x-ray and breast exam for sure,
and if you mention Al Qaeda nonchalantly,
you'll...

Read more of this work...

The medic said put on these knickers
By golly they caused me loud snickers
Featuring a butt flap
They are truly mad cap
Not ‘cut out’ for tea at...

Read more of this work...

I met a proper woman in a proper pub on a Monday in Peoria. It was noon, time for lunch, and we were sitting stool...

Read more of this work...