Best Clientele Poems

My thumbs pressed on the trigger.
The M-2 bucked its load.
I squinted down the barrel
And watched his head explode.
An early morning ambush,
A steaming Luzon hell,
For Ferdi...

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A Roomba* in England went AWOL;
It disappeared from a hotel. 
They searched high and low 
All the spots it might go 
With no help from...

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A brotherly jaunt through sinister mirth
behold the brothers Death: 

gowned and guided, an ill century
the fourteenth, an alliance of crop, of plague
in ground-down death of...

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They call you corporate?
Well then so am I
You’re that same guy I saw pass by
And cut your eyes in my direction
Like I was some kind...

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Why do people pay big bucks
For something by Chanel?
I realize that they’re selling to 
A wealthy clientele…

But I really just don’t get it.
Every pocketbook or...

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Steam Train Troubles

Percival the steward of the train
Ordered foie gras and oysters too
But left them on the station platform like a fool
Wealthy customers will find...

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Your Honor, I Object

By Elton Camp

Lawyer Louie caters to a special clientele 
Only those who are rich and guilty as hell
And, in exchange for his...

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Cowardly this loathsome fellow
In old west they’d call him yellow
I guess that was his biggest flaw
Jealous greater than Othello

He wanted more, the more he saw
Hauling...

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As a great lover of classical music
over many years the violin became ace
one particular lovely lady enchanted me
Anne-Sophie Mutter classically first place

This lady appeared in...

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Everyone voted Mrs. Garret’s tree as the best Christmas display in the village. Which was surprising in a way, as she was not really a...

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I ran across a recipe book
Called ‘Cuisine For Clientele’,
On the cover was an unchaste cook
Making prosti-soup and broth-el.

On the back it stated that ‘Eating
Is the...

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A true Banshee knows how to kick some tail
Leprechaun's give and take, but never full sail
A Centaur speaks with the truth, to no avail
Ask a...

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One day in early summer Murphy the Irishman came to town,
He rode upon a matted mule , his face was burnt and brown,
The corks that...

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This mall is quite gigantic,
Filled with every type of store.
It even boasts a Ferris wheel,
Which families adore.

The food court, rife with choices,
Is right near the...

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Being privileged to have known scores of
Americans known as 'the greatest generation',
I attest to the reality of their greatness.

Herein, greatness will not reference those who...

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