Best Cheapskate Poems

How can I repay this debt,
When all I owe is Life's regrets?
Such dividends I'll never spend-
The cost to just forget!...

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husband’s cheap gift wife’s 
expression priceless wife drags 
tightwad mate to court 


Created and posted : 23 November 2020

Contest : Make Me Laugh With Some...

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*Bump and Grind* 
Jerkin' 
Twerkin' 

*Swing* 
Now Go 
Down Low 

*Moonwalk* 
Jackson's 
Actions 

*Hip Hop Slam* 
Word slap 
Fast rap 

*Pop Stars* 
Scandal 
Vandal 

*One...

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The grandfather on my mother's side was a cheapskate. 
A real cheapskate.
One Christmas, he gave me a used paperback book.
Something like “Jimmy Plays Baseball.”
It was...

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I think I'll write a country song
about the weasel that 'done me wrong'
We'd have been married thirty years today
if he hadn't had a penchant to...

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My date said, “I always order water on my dates.”
“Then I can save a couple of bucks, which is great.”
Alarm bells started to go off...

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Once upon a time a well-stacked, beautiful Playmate
One featured in Hefner’s magazine, which was first rate
bought herself a marvelous Hollywood estate
With future proceeds she hoped...

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I love thunder storms and Mexican food
I love dogs and being in a good mood
I like learning new things
I used to wear my hair in...

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2/23/21

From May to April
Faithful
Remaining grateful
And thankful
Hiking around with a dog named Hazel
Sometimes watching a movie or something on cable
Got to make the best of it,...

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What do the dodgers dodge? 
Remind me to lace up my socks, 
Put on my boots and be born again.
Trained and ready, steady, go! 
An...

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can you open the floodgates



one coffee date
nothing ornate
why can't you relate
why do you skate
the subject of debate
I'm not cheapskate
I'll let you dictate
and narrate
stories of fate
I...

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Cheapskate perfume soils sweat-strapped ambience,
Crippled, choked extractor fan despair,
Palms dripping moisture cling to greased pale hips,
Swaying on the shag-pile threading bare.
Urgent urge to strip her...

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(This is a true story)

His daughter died because he was a cheapskate.
He was tight with his money and she met a horrible fate.
He had a...

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I'll tell you the reason why my neighbor's head has a big dent.
I mowed his yard and cleaned his gutters and he paid me 25...

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(This is a fictional poem)

I'm all alone and I feel remorse.
A cheap VCR caused me to get a divorce.
Many people say that was a silly...

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