Best Chappy Poems

I heard of a fella named Roger
Who had the most ginormous todger
Guys envied his dong
(Twas twelve inches long)
Six widows now share Rodger lodger!

These widows don’t charge Roger rent
But night after night Roger’s spent -
This randy young chappy
Sure makes these gals happy
I’m surprised his todger’s not...

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The sweet Megan Markle had that bright sparkle
for she landed herself a true prince
Our dear handsome Harry, was never contrary
But the Queen he had to convince

All Britain is fawning, this is a new dawning
for actress turned royal brings fame
the coffers are filling, and tourism's thrilling
The...

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Holy crappola
My hair's thinning out
I'm much too young
It's making me pout

My pride and joy
My whole life through
Can't imagine me bald
Bet neither can you

Given this guy is
So rugged and stylish
Admittedly sometimes
A trifle bit childish

A dapper chappy
But with everything said
My crowning glory
Is up on my head

It defines...

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The sound of laughter
From the belly
Grandpa's stomach
Wobbling like jelly
Baby clapping hands with glee
A very joyous sight to see.

Everybody's worries vanish,
Frowning faces 
Today are banished
Family woes are left unspoken
Promises made
Will not be broken

Concerns left outside the door,
They will remain there for awhile
Nobody is welcome
If they don't...

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HOT WHEELS!

I went from broke to buying a Lamborghini,
Price tag not so teeny,
Sleek and black, for my Driving Academy,
Or should I buy the red Ferrari,
Command a salesman to 'comprare'?
Wouldn't he be a happy chappy?
But would it make me so happy?
I would be buying loads of...

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Three cousins played a “game’ of war
A map of Europe spread across the floor
No adults there to keep the score
As each of them wanted more and more

Three of four empires lay upon that map
As they played and ‘warred’ and they did clap
For them it was...

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This here's the story of a jaunty young fellow
His name was Theodore J. Wigglesworth
A distinguished sort of a chappy he was
Who lived in the small town of Perth

Every morning at the very first light of dawn
Mr. Wigglesworth could usually be found
Sitting on Margaret Higginbotham's front...

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My husband was helping clean out an old shed
With our dog contently watching him
All rubbish items were thrown to the ground
Ready to go in the big hire bin

Very late the same  evening while we watched t.v
I thought our dog looked somewhat cock-eyed
Sitting upright with...

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THE INTERVIEW....    by JULIE GRENNESS   27/6/2015

My agenda today is an interview,
I'm looking forward to a chat with you,
Come, sit right down, have a beer,
Waiting for this chat, my dear,
I'm asking, "Can you make me happy?"
You look an intelligent chappy!
What would...

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IF   YOU’RE   HAPPY  AND   YOU  KNOW    IT. . . . . 


If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.
If you don’t clap it means  either you’re  not happy,
Or  you...

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As green and sweet smelling as freshly cut grass	
out in a meadow in May	
Comes a tall little angel, bold as can be	
Striding out with a canter, comes A	
	
Following, galloping, alone and in pairs	
But always eager to please	
Red as fine poppies, perfumed as the rose	
We smile...

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I’ve made some money,

But she’s made more.

Knock knock!

Another punter at the door.

I slip on my shoes,

Put my lipstick on.

This man is eager,

Again, comes a ‘ding dong’.

He picks me,

I should be happy,

But I have to have sex,

With this vile chappy.

His eyes light up,

As I give him...

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Old Sam had carted nightsoil for a decade ‘round our town; 
A happy sort of chappy that let nothing get him down. 
He always found solutions to most problems in this life 
And went to no ends finding ways to rid himself of strife. 
...

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Sometimes I feel, 
that life is not real.

Sometimes I feel so fake,
like I could use a stake,
to hurt myself but I won't.

Sometimes I feel so happy,
but feel so flappy,
My lips are chappy.

As I turned away i looked in the mirror,
I seen no hair, in the...

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There was a knock on my door,
It made my heart thumbing indoor,
Chappy lips and sweaty hands along my heart so sore.
 
On the third knock my heartbeat skyrocketed.
Panic was banging all over my body,
Distant noise of people at a party,
The sound of brewing coffee from...

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