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Best Busting A Gut Poems | Poetry

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The Best Busting A Gut Poems

Details | Busting A Gut Poem | Create an image from this poem.

From my fun to my work

I will dig my way out
As I’m mired in muck
Will I sit here and pout
Or start fixing my truck

There is so much to do
With no time to do it
Cannot sit here and brew
It is time to get to it

With the work never ending
But I know what to do
All the twisting and bending
And the making anew

From my fun to my work
It is quite a transition
If I can be a jerk
It is all my ambition

If I sit here and write
Will not get the work done
I am not to uptight
As my work I won’t shun

Time to get up from my butt
And get back to my work
Will start busting a gut
There is no time to shirk

My friends I am going
Getting back on my track
There is no time for toying
It’s ok I’ll be back

Copyright © john bernard | Year Posted 2011

Details | Busting A Gut Poem | Create an image from this poem.

I Accidently Let One Loose

I accidently let one loose,
As easily as grease passes thru a goose,
That moment I sincerely regret,
But there was no stopping it.

The large lady in the next pew,
Jumped up and shouted, “OH GOD!, PHEW”!
The congregation still will say,
The Holy Spirit grabbed her that day.

She was gagging and retching and flopping on the floor,
All the while the pastor prayed, “More!, More!, More!
That hellish cloud soon covered the church,
And all at once they began to lurch.

Praying to God for some salvation,
Running and shouting strange lamentations,
Wringing their hands in extreme regret,
For awful sins they hadn’t committed yet. 

I was laughing and busting a gut,
For what accidently jumped out of my butt,
The cloud finally lifted and they began to behave,
On that famous Sunday the whole church was saved.

All because that day during the mass,
I accidently let loose that Holy gas,
They say God works in strange ways,
It was certainly true that fateful day.

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Copyright © Timothy McGuire | Year Posted 2018