Best Bludger Poems

For ten months now I’ve brooded over coming second place
in the pickle section deeming, it no less than a disgrace.
It was written plain and simple, so there can be no excuse,
that the pickles in this section must be made from local produce. 

So my asparagus...

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In the land of Oz, we're all fair dinkum,
Every bloke, Sheila and Healer too.
By crikey mate, if you get us started,
You'll regret the day I guarantee you.

In bonza days some may call hard yakka,
With an esky chockers and a barbie that blares.
Strewth! I tell you...

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Another long weekend’s upon us and we’re ready, set to go,
To get amongst the bream again, along the river Tambo.
Our adrenaline is rushing and we’re really bloody keen,
To celebrate with fishing while, we’re toasting to the queen…
And when arriving Friday night,
We were told the fishing’s...

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Foul fowl
I was staggering to the mall, 
in my own decrepid way,
When I got accosted by a Shiela,
 who shook my hand said ‘hey’,
Busy as a flustered bee, 
I brushed her off today,
A parting quip from her it came,
“With rotten breath, I'd not be game,
To...

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The Red Devil, Bronco Johnson in 75

I lived in Morningside, moved in a massage parlor girl
2 kids a Kangaroo dog and a white rat called Merle (Greyhound roo catcher)
We had a druggie ambo man, so Wayne put her in his bed
And they’d be a smoking...

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The black
crow sat on the
stump out front,
The old man heartily
swore,
He said you aint a
cunny funt,
Followed  by the 12
guage roar,

Feathers flew and a
cold wind it blew,
And the cancer bit
some more,
Just a spit of
blood, not  quite a
flood,
Cos death was
coming, sure,

Joe crow was arking
out the front,
And...

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Destroyer ~ Poet
Contest Name	5TH POEM ON THE SOUP..
POISON! 1st first.
I was coming up from Tamworth, riding on a tired horse. 
Past Barraba we wandered north, on a slow and dusty course.
 Near Barraba I drew short rein, and paused to watch a sight. 
A boy...

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As ye sow, 
you get the maybe corn, 
and reap,
the stinking  uncooked prawn,
cos ye n me are slack ....

ones deed comes up to speed ,
like car on the racing track,
it comes around yes indeed,
next time it gives you a smack,
karma on the racetrack steed,
a...

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Little chant for ya...

bloody ciggie takes me breath,
the stinker comes between,
nicotene pfinger pokes ,
me dad is dead it means,
dont get so dead   ice-scream.....
suck slack tobacco is the joke,

says the man from nicotene....

chant it babe........Don

~got to have a hobby hey,
suck a ciggie all the...

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Harry and George
Harry West and Georgie Leonard,
  were climbing up the hump,
Hot lead was a falling down,
 through yer hat and foot, ka-thump,

So steep were the sides, 
dropped grenades, a bouncing fell,
Japanese held the hilltop,
 with machine guns as well,
Till the Aussies got above...

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Drinking with Tood at StGeorge…

Lets drink to ole Tood Taylor, 
who was full of it,
Prisoner of the Japanese, 
had the scours just a bit,
So the Jap’s they had him a cooking ,
And the extra care he took ,
To help out with the flavour,
Squatting over the...

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angelic kisses from the missus,
no it wasn't she?
bludger had some spiky whiskas
awful bugger werent a 4 me,
watch out for dem shirt-tail  lifters,
bugger off stop bugging me...

re: 'sweet nothings' Dave Williams...

good on ya mate.....Don

love is sweet, but incomplete,
 if ya strike a gal 
with whiskers...

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diving off the old black stump,
suiciding 4 the ground,
bloody cattle dog, is a biting me,
bringing about just half a frown,

6 feet down ought ta do it,
break me neck, get hammered ears,
off me rear you cattle bludger,
best 4 flying, don't intefere  

uh oh im flying...

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So I used the magic sort-of- black,
Put a crimp in his bowel, painful Jack,
Thoughts are deeds, but they hit back,
In your next life I’m advising.

Just a little black in me face,
Reborn in Africa’s darkest race,
Born to suffer, no solace,
Ol crimped bowel with me rising.

So we...

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