Best Answering Machine Poems

I saw that red, flashing “1” on my answering machine
and stared at it for over an hour;
in my thoughts replayed that terrible scene –
she must have called while I was in the shower.

Perhaps that message is one of remorse;
Perhaps it continues the fight;
Hit the button...

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Hello Dr. Phil, have you got a segment
I've got a few things latched onto my mind
Don't worry this won't take but a second
If you do me this I'll return the favor in kind

Hello Dr. Phil, it's about my mother
Well really both her and my mother...

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I have updated my phones, all the latest gadgets, that is me
So this day I unplugged the old answering machine
No longer needed, a redundant old piece
Time for the old thing to be put to rest
It has served me well over the years
Keeping me in touch...

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Sometimes I yearn for a human voice,
when I hear a machine's electronic beep.
The science of the answering machine
puts my human heart to sleep.

In the struggle to find a conversation,
many recorded messages are found.
But my weary ears dream of 
the comforting tone of human sound.

Dealing with...

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Beep!
Yo! this GOD
You most likely calling
Cause time don got hard
You either got yourself put in jail
Got send to hell
Or maybe things just not going so well  
But I’ll hear you out anyway
If you got seriously injured
Trying to be a hero press zero
If you want...

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I am not ashamed, if, I am that black and small
I have the patience of the saints and time for all
And, whenever I am called I answer right away
Just as from anybody, whether a friend or enemy
I take greetings, news, gossips, and all messages
I keep...

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Answering Machine

RRRRRRING…………
Hello and welcome to Oliver’s Olive Oil
Press1 to track your order
Press 2 to place a new order
Press 3 to cancel your order
Press 4 to speak to customer service
Press 5 to find our ours of operation
Press 6 to repeat these options

Press 4 RRRRRRING…….
Hello and welcome...

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Tired
and its raining
lonely
and so jaded
are you there?
The place you would be?
Are you happy?
Are you thinking of me?
Tired
the wind calls your name
lonely
and its all your fault
Are you there?
Can you answer me?
Are you smiling?
Are you thinking of me?

Broken hearted
I'm calling out to you
corrosive love
I've been the fool
desolation
and...

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