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Your Pain My Loss

Your pain my loss within your flight Contained and lost within your night I need you then I need you now I bleed for you with broken vow Undone and torn you fought the fight Held close your lies with all my might Felt most alone with cries of fright Now on my knees I pray and bow Your pain my loss Above the clouds I lost my sight With love aloud I crossed hands tight No more conviction I’ll allow Torn with affliction, don’t know how My soul craves yours with deep contrite Your pain my loss *Internal Rhyme used* Date Written: July 11, 2016

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016




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Date: 9/27/2016 2:49:00 PM
Congratulations Laura: I like the repeating refrain. The internal rhyme sustains the pain. Cheers, SuZ
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Date: 9/24/2016 9:48:00 PM
Laura, Congratulations on your well-deserved win. :):):) Stop by my latest blog "Last Laugh." if you'd like. Always & Forever ~LINDA~
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Lu Loo
Date: 9/25/2016 9:55:00 AM
thank you very much for my placement lovely Linda :)-luloo
Date: 7/20/2016 1:01:00 AM
This is beautiful, Laura:) I too chose to use internal rhyme in mine, though I never saw your example till today:)
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Date: 7/11/2016 11:58:00 AM
This is excellent. Beautiful write. It's a fun form, too. So many possibilities with the first four syllables. You picked some great ones
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Lu Loo
Date: 7/11/2016 4:35:00 PM
thank you Phillip :)-luloo

Book: Shattered Sighs