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You Look Udderly Amazing

Pretty Bessie the cow was on the pull -
she had her sights set on Billy the bull

To attract the attention of this young man
Bessie the cow came up with a cunning plan

She had plastic surgery to enhance the way she looked
When he saw the transformation that young bull was hooked!

Bessie the cow also had some body piercing done
But when it came to milking this wasn’t so much fun!

Billy admired her whilst he was grazing
Bessie’s body now looked ‘udderly amazing’

Soon Billy and Bessie fell head over heels
They are always together in the farmer’s fields

Many many thanks to Mama Bear for sending me the two pictures which inspired this poem

11th October 2016

Copyright © Jan Allison | Year Posted 2016

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Sunlite Wanter Date: 6/15/2017 6:22:00 PM You are one funny lady! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 6/15/2017 6:34:00 PM I do have fun writing and making other folks smile Sunlite:-) hugs Jan xx

Joseph Soper Date: 6/15/2017 6:48:00 AM Jan, loved this fun little read!! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 6/15/2017 6:49:00 AM Thanks Jospeh its lovely to have older poems featured on the page as they get another chance of being read again - glad you enjoyed the humour here:-) hugs Jan xx

Ralph Sergi Date: 6/12/2017 4:33:00 PM I loved this, JAN! It was almost Moo-sical! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 6/12/2017 4:36:00 PM LOL Ralph I write so many poems i forget about them and I'm so glad this particular one has been featured:-) hugs Jan xx

Dean Wood Date: 6/12/2017 3:22:00 PM Thoroughly enjoyed it Jan! We need a little more "Light Poetry" on the Soup I think! - Dean Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 6/12/2017 3:33:00 PM I try and bring a little humour with as many poems as I can Dean:-) hugs Jan xx

John Leong Date: 6/12/2017 11:05:00 AM that was humorous. i felt like i could see the country side and the two characters. cheers! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 6/12/2017 11:36:00 AM Thanks so much John :-)Mama Bear sends me some awesome pics to inspire me and sometimes I have fun and write poems based on the pics:-) hugs Jan xx

Paloma P Date: 10/16/2016 2:42:00 AM I simply love your sense of humor. The graphics are hysterical, she must have had implants! Udderly comical. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/16/2016 4:56:00 AM Thanks:-)

Viv Wigley Date: 10/14/2016 11:18:00 PM Dairy funny, Jan. Viv x Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/15/2016 1:07:00 AM ha ha ha - there is no bull from you Mr Viv:-) hugs Jan xx

Michelle Mac Donald Date: 10/13/2016 1:59:00 PM Thanks for the smiles, Jan! :) This poem is a hoot, and the illustrations fit it to a T. I doubt that "Pretty Bessie" would wish to trade off "Billy the Bull, for Freddie the steer". Hugs to you!! Mikki Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/13/2016 2:46:00 PM The pictures were the inspiration for the poem:-) there is a poet called mama bear who sends me pictures every day to inspire me to write - the funniest pics I save for future poems but sometimes the poems just beg to be written there and then and this was one of the results:-) hugs Jan xx

Jean Murray Date: 10/12/2016 2:40:00 PM This reminds me of Freddie The Bull Jan. After leaping over a barbed wire fence to meet his "Pretty Bessie", she said..."You must be Freddie The Bull?" He replied..."Just call me Freddie." Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/13/2016 8:36:00 AM Phew I thought there was a poem on a similar theme:-) hugs Jan xx Jean Murray Date: 10/13/2016 5:43:00 AM I never wrote about Freddie Jan. It was just a joke I heard mant moons ago. Jan Allison Date: 10/12/2016 3:00:00 PM Can you soup mail me the poem you mean Jean I have just google 'freddie the bull' and can't find it:-) hugs jan xx Jan Allison Date: 10/12/2016 2:52:00 PM Oh I will read it Jean I'm not familiar with it I just wrote the poem based on the 2 pics Mama bear sent me:-) hugs Jan xx

Sherri Whiteford Date: 10/11/2016 10:38:00 PM WOW!! When I see anyone especially a real live woman writing funny stuff like this, it simply amazes me. I have only written 1 limerick in my time, and I really don't think I could even call it funny. This udderly tickled me pink. haha. Your intelligence astounds me. 7 Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/12/2016 6:26:00 PM Your comment made me smile thanks Marti:-) Hugs jan xx Jan Allison Date: 10/12/2016 3:34:00 AM Thanks:-)

Joseph May Date: 10/11/2016 6:01:00 PM Lol...I guess she put the mooves on him!... Jan, what did the mama cow say to the baby cow.... Login to Reply Joseph May Date: 10/11/2016 9:47:00 PM You got it with the first one Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 6:07:00 PM Great comment Joseph .... its pasture bedtime I guess lol or you've eaten too much grass and soon I will hear the sound of mooooo sick lol - oh gosh i should be a comedian lol:-) hugs jan xx

Abdullah Alhemaidy Date: 10/11/2016 5:35:00 PM Remind me with the famous French poet, La Fontaine (not sure about the spelling). It's Excellent! I have tried to give up poetry several times. But.., because of poets like you, I do not think so. You made my day :) Best regards. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 5:43:00 PM Thank you for the lovely comment Abdullah - let me say your comment has made MY day thank you so much. I am stunned at how popular this little poem has been - seems there is always room for a poem to make people smile and I can write humour at the drop of a hat no matter what is happening in my own life:-) hugs jan xx

Paul Callus Date: 10/11/2016 3:48:00 PM Absolutely funny, Jan:)) After all those witty comments I'm left with little else to add, except that that bull looks horn-y! Hugs // paul Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 3:57:00 PM ha ha ha that is hilarious!:-)I am walking on air from all the lovely comments on this poem I dont think I've had so many on a poem in such a short space of time:-) hugs Jan xx

CayCay Jennings Date: 10/11/2016 2:40:00 PM So today a cow is a cow, right? I knew I could count on you, who I've been following around on sad one-liner pages, to provide humorous relief (I can't read anymore today.) Your poem is, as usual, well-crafted with such an enjoyable, flowing rhyme scheme and, need I say, great content. Your steer - ed my emotions in the right direction. Love ... CayCay Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 3:13:00 PM Thanks so much CayCay:-) hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith Date: 10/11/2016 2:02:00 PM haha...great one...very moooo-ving Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 2:07:00 PM Cheers Tim:-) hugs jan xx

Darren White Date: 10/11/2016 1:28:00 PM I almost start to studder, when I'm looking at that udder, so I refrain from fudder commenting......... Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 2:06:00 PM ha ha ha love it Darren am having great fun reading the comments:-) hugs Jan xx

Eileen Manassian Date: 10/11/2016 12:59:00 PM Oh Jan....You and Mama Bear have been up to mischief. It is an utterly amazing poem. Hugs! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 2:06:00 PM ha ha ha thanks Eileen:-) hugs Jan xx

Mark Paul Van Der Merwe Date: 10/11/2016 11:35:00 AM Me again - Her milk must be better than the Udders - LOL Mark Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 11:54:00 AM Thanks Mark that is so kind of you - if I do use it full credit will be given to you:-) hugs Jan xx Mark Paul Van Der Merwe Date: 10/11/2016 11:47:00 AM Jan after all the fantastic help you have given me you may use the better than the udders freely lol - my gift to you. Mark Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 11:35:00 AM ha ha ha very clever comment Mark :-) hugs Jan xx

Mark Paul Van Der Merwe Date: 10/11/2016 11:34:00 AM What a mootiful story Jan - great humour, I enjoyed this. - No Bull here - lol Regards, Mark Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 11:38:00 AM Oh I am laughing at your two comments Mark - you need to write a poem with better than the udders in it - fabulous humour! Wish I'd have thought of that line:-):-) hugs Jan xx

Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty Date: 10/11/2016 11:28:00 AM Bessie is so clever.Billy is a connoisseur of real stuff.Jan, your poem is ‘udderly amazing’ too. Love. Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 11:35:00 AM aww thanks Rajat:-) hugs Jan xx

Anna-Marie Docherty Date: 10/11/2016 11:13:00 AM Hahaa! What a fun piece to stumble upon. Fabulous and has winner written all over it surely? Bravo! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 11:22:00 AM It's just a fun write not for any contest at all:-) hugs Jan xx

Mama Bear Date: 10/11/2016 9:37:00 AM Now that is a lot of bull. Glad you enjoyed the photos and made such a great poem out of them. A huge 7 from me and enjoy the pictures as they come in. Will do my best for inspiration Hugs Edith Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 10:17:00 AM Oh Mama Bear the pics you sent together were absolutely priceless and perfect to have a poem written about them. Thank you so so much for inspiring me:-) hugs jan xx

Daniel Turner Date: 10/11/2016 9:27:00 AM A hilarious metaphor Jan. You are just too talented! Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 10:57:00 AM :-) thank you :-) my smile is wider than Anne lise's now:-) hugs Jan xx Daniel Turner Date: 10/11/2016 10:53:00 AM I think you are a special lady and all that word implies:) Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 10:19:00 AM I guess some would consider my poems a load of bull Daniel lol:-) but if I can make other people smile that is the most important thing to me:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y. Date: 10/11/2016 9:09:00 AM LoI! Jan, this is so funny. You Mama Bear make quite the team. She sends the funny picture and it inspires you to write some good poems. Well done:-)Alexis Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 10:20:00 AM I get sent about 5 funnies every day by Mama Bear and keep the my favourites so I can use them for poems. :-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen Date: 10/11/2016 8:55:00 AM - ..... if I had not ears ....... my smile would be completely around the head .... thanks, Jan :))) - a 7 - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Login to Reply Jan Allison Date: 10/11/2016 10:21:00 AM That is a wonderful compliment Anne Lise I am glad I can make you smile - and you bring sunshine into our lives:-) hugs Jan xx

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