Why Didnt I

Why did I give in so easy every time they came after me and made me feel so powerless? Every time they’d push, I would fall. You’d think after the first time, I’d be strong. Why didn’t I keep talking even when I told somebody and they weren’t listening? Why didn’t I run away, though beaten and weary, and get myself to safety? Maybe I’d still be innocent if I had, but where was my strength every time? Why didn’t I try harder? Why didn’t I fight smarter? Why didn’t I scream louder? The what if’s are endless, and in the end, they’d never change a thing. So why didn’t I lose all hope? Why didn’t I break and let go? How is it I’m still here—a survivor?