Week 2 - Brian's Poet of Note - 'Herman Hesse'
Brian’s Poet of Note – ‘Herman Hesse’ Week 2
This week I thought I would discuss translating poetry from another language. I just finished retranslating from German this poem ‘Stufen’ from Hesse’s famous novel ‘The Glass Bead Game’) but it has been a favorite of mine for a long time. I first translated it 50 years ago when I was studying German in college, but I have misplaced the earlier translation. So today I include the original version of Hesse’s poem in German as well for those who can read German or those who want to compare my translation to the original German.
There are different ways to translate a poem if this is something new to you. 1. The simplest way is a word for literal word translation. And these are interesting in themselves I think but suffer from the fact that the word the poet chooses may not always be the best word in expressing the poet’s intent. For example, an idiom in German might sound funny translated into English, but there might be an expression in English that is the German equivalent, but which uses very different words. 2. Some translations skip rhythm and rhyme altogether but try to communicate the translators “understanding” of the poem using often very different words. 3. And finally, some translations will make an effort to preserve the structure and even the rhythm and rhyme pattern as well. It is not easy to do this and to also use most of the poet’s original words!
Whatever technique you use, the original poet’s poem is going to suffer. Think of it as reading a friend’s poem and then trying to write a personal version of the original work's content without looking at your friend’s poem again. Rewriting another's idea is a fun game to play. Sometimes I will write an Echo Poem of a friend’s poetry. I rewrite his poem using my Muse and interpretation of reality, or the Echo may veer off tangentially and not be my version of his effort but of what I think is true. Both are fun exercises when you are looking for something different to do. It seems to me that translating another poet’s poem is very similar to writing an Echo Poem in many ways.
Hesse’s Original Poem in German Translation
Stufen Stages (First Translation)
Wie jede Blüte welkt und jede Jugend As every blossom wilts and every
youth
Dem Alter weicht, blüht jede Lebensstufe, Yields to old age so manifests
every stage of life,
Blüht jede Weisheit auch und jede Tugend All wisdom and every virtue
Zu ihrer Zeit und darf nicht ewig dauren. Has its time, and cannot last
forever.
Es muß das Herz bei jedem Lebensrufe At every call of life, the heart,
Bereit zum Abschied sein und Neubeginne, Wrapped in bravery and without
regret,
Um sich in Tapferkeit und ohne Trauern Must be ready to take its leave
and start again
In andre, neue Bindungen zu geben. To embrace each new adventure.
Und jedem Anfang wohnt ein Zauber inne, For a magic lives in each
beginning,
Der uns beschützt und der uns hilft, zu leben. That shelters and helps us to
thrive.
Wir sollen heiter Raum um Raum durchschreiten, Let us move calmly from
place to place,
An keinem wie an einer Heimat hängen, Clinging to nothing as if it were a
home,
Der Weltgeist will night fesseln uns und engen, The “Age” does not chain or
confine our dreams,
Er will uns Stuf’ um Stufe heben, weiten. It guides each step toward
increased opportunity.
Kaum sind wir heimisch einem Lebenskreise But homelike surroundings,
creature comforts,
Und traulich eingewohnt, so droht Erschlaffen, Tempt us to let down our guard.
Nur wer bereit zu Aufbruch ist und Reise, Only those prepared to let go,
to love revolution,
Mag lähmender Gewöhnung sich entraffen. Have a chance to escape
crippling habits.
Es wird vielleicht auch noch die Todesstunde Perhaps even the hour of our
death
Uns neuen Räumen jung entgegensenden, Will open fresh new vistas to
challenge us,
Des Lebens Ruf an uns wird niemals enden . . . Might life’s call to life be never
ending then?
Wohlan denn, Herz, nimm Abschied und gesunde! Let it be so! Heart! Take your
leave and health!
Well this seems to be the best I can do with the formating. There are more comments to come. If you like what you see so far be sure to check back later. This is obviously a work in progress and experimental! :-)
Copyright © Brian Johnston | Year Posted 2017
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