Waves of Worry
Walking by the edge of the ocean
I think of all the times you let me down
Deceived me
Lied to me
Hurt me
Abused me
I drag my feet in the sand
Let the water wash the troubles from my feet
Pick up a seashell
Turn it in my hands
Think of my life
My life as the shell
Wrinkled and withered
Abandoned by others
Abandoned by myself
Left for the emptiness
And the grievance of others
The shell chipping away
Like my life has chipped away
Piece falling here
Falling there
Falling all to pieces
A steady tear rolls down my cheek
I began to throw the shell in the ocean
Just like I wish to throw myself
I begin wading in the shallow water
Going deeper and deeper into the ocean
The waves are rolling over my torso
The saltiness is burning my skin
Just like the put downs have burnt my heart and spirit
I walk further out
Until I cant walk any more
I hold the shell
My life
Close to my heart
Clutch with my hands, heart, and soul
Steadily begin to sink to the bottom
Still clutching my shell
I open my eyes under water
The fish are translucent
The water is fluorescent
I let the waves wash over me
I sink into the dark unknowing
The last I see is the red translucent fish with big teeth swimming hurriedly at me
Copyright © Catherine Varnado | Year Posted 2005
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