Wake Up Call

Sitting here in this cold dark cell thinking about hard we was liven in the hood!! Never thought I would be 15 years old strung out painkillers doing atleast twenty or thirty pills a day if I didn't have any I didn't get out bed I treated my parents horrible until my life was turned upside down.. Laying in bed i hear someone knocking on the door it gets louder and stronger theres atleast twenty police officers outside front and back. Sheriff's and all come in read us our warrants at the time I'm scared,devasted crying my heart out who in the hell would do something like this to my family? They put me in handcuffs in walk me out the house into the cop car and we all. Meet again as we are being booked all I hear is mom and dad saying babygirl its going to be okay!! No it wasn't judge sent me to a juvenile detention center where I stayed for 3 1/2 weeks can't sleep or eat withdrawals are so bad I just wait to die... Return to court in my orange county jump suit as I face the judge I'm terrified scared wondering what's happening.I see my parents across the room just want to hug them tell them I'm sorry for everything, judge comes out we discuss what's going on luckily he didn't charge me as an adult.. As I'm sitting there he asked is there anyone that could take her in my grandmother stood up and said no so I went to Vincent's Indiana to a rehabilitation center where I stayed for 8months then moved to an independent living program another 6 months I graduated from there and was moved to foster care about 4 times til they found a family for me!! I was so lost and confused. But I found myself but at the age of 17 I was raped and treated like I was nothing!! Even though I lived with the chief of police the judge said I deserved. Not right at all.. Ive so many regrets, mistakes, but I'm only getting stronger but that doesn't mean I'm healed I will never be the same.. Holding grudges scared to go any where alone.. I am being judged every where I go!! I was so upset,mad,devasted, depressed, lost and confused and full of hatred..