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Vogan Poetry Contest

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This is Vogan Poetry, the third worst poetry in the universe. Used primarily as torture. The themes are obnoxious wording, disjointed, irritating, painful to have anything to do with, nonsensical but almost something to engage the brain before it's flung off again. Basically thoroughly unpleasant. Even the dog objected to these vocals (as you'll hear mid way through). I hated listening back to it, but couldn't bear to do it again! Haha :) From The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

Listen to poem:

Flirt "a-n-t-o-p" itch, scrabch eau ladle Yabba scent moral reelf fablet C'ertain istic heft log glitcheskin Sellodaffle feft, fall guppit, helpfullf eft Dreada leffa jaffa __ poins __ agailiflimbo* Jesticlete justice pontificatesoffel Huff-huff hailstomp flarlt felfy richovet Fiffity fiffitytozzlet FIFFITY! fiffity satchol Scrabch you/you-we sheard it earlf firt Scrabch firt ear itz sklllllllheark youp! YOU scrabchertcle yolpit singalong Feet aflenty scorp asklenty skloooooooooooo Ghowmetintin skeinedabtling jentwootz Sustthrottles bunbuntdownzkit-chiccotoon Cratuopiot fanta fapvours tangool scarrot rust Dzimp faglendle stttew mottled sjurp! Prepru barium flakles sprinkled avo settoost Jester jingles ear drumk cankling din? Dracke flutteresticalesqueet et et et phlegmat Hetch lentilatatitivationalextravaganza Tinkle thort ivorise thumble flotvorr Frosgrintning drayquay outsizeet etcetera (*[agailiflimbo])

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Ink Empress

Date: 1/11/2025 6:55:00 AM

Ah this is so clever and creative! It feels like youv created your own language! I love how well you read the poem and also your wordplay here is so innovative and just brilliant! Surely requires creative intelligence on a whole different level to be able to do something like this in a poetic manner! You have nailed it and you should be proud of your ability to write in any form or genre in such a seamless rhythm! I love thr way youve ended it! I am not sure if i can do this but your poem has inspired me to write one! Or maybe try atleast! Such an ineffable and brilliant take! Best wishes for the contest!!! Pleasure reading this one! Sending you light always

Di11y Da11y
Date: 1/11/2025 9:58:00 AM

I may have got carried away! I made it as bad as I could whilst still retaining some level of meaning. The idea is it's uncomfortable to endure to the point of painful lol. Thank you so much for your high praise - I cringed once I'd posted it but was then out sledging (observing) because it's icy here. Hopefully everyone will join in with their own efforts soon enough :) I'll look forward to reading yours

Paul Willason

Date: 1/11/2025 3:19:00 AM

There must be something wrong with me DD...I can understand this perfectly...I am astounded that your spelling is without error according to the Vogan dictionary. You speak the language without a discernible accent. Amaaazing !

Di11y Da11y
Date: 1/11/2025 3:53:00 AM

Thanks Paul, it was fun to make it as dreadful as possible and a delight when the dog joined in lol. It's definitely hackle inducing, if not full on torture :) I despise that ending but resisted ending pleasantly and couldn't possibly do it all again, I was all coughed out haha

Di11y Da11y

Date: 1/11/2025 3:15:00 AM

The idea is that your skin crawls by the end... Mine does! Lol yuck