Jan Allison Poet Limerick

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Uncle Dick Extended - Bawdy

My uncle is married to Brandie -
A nympho who’s frequently randy
If she’s in the mood
He’s no chance of food ...
Their dining table comes in handy!

My uncle he dresses so dapper
Whilst Brandie resembles a slapper
Tight tops plunge so low
Huge boobies on show
Their neighbours wife sure wants to slap her

The neighbour’s husband has now clued
That Brandie sunbathes in the nude
He’ll climbs up his stairs
And views all she bares
To 'bird watching' he is now glued!

Part 1 written for Tania's contest but i couldnt resist extending the poem

08/30/20

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Jack Horne September 16, 2020 at 11:20 AM LOL, a sure winner here in the contest

Sean Kelly September 14, 2020 at 12:59 AM Having read and laughed my head-off at your winning piece ( Well deserved) I didn't think it could get better, but it DID! Clever/ witty perfectly rhymed presentation. We may not always have something to laugh about , BUT , there is always something we can laugh at ! And you smash it here ! I hope "UNCLE" can keep up with her, if not, at least he'll die with a huge smile on his face .Write onnnnn , Seán Jan Allison September 16, 2020 at 2:39 PM thanks Sean I adore the limerick form and the chance to be a little risque and make folk smile lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Tania Kitchin September 6, 2020 at 10:30 AM Ha Ha Ha, LOVE it Jan, you never disappoint with your humor, a great set of hilarious limericks added to your original! hugs Jan Allison September 16, 2020 at 2:38 PM thanks for the inspiration with the contest:-) hugs jan xx Jan Allison September 16, 2020 at 1:39 PM it was such fun to write i couldnt stop after the first poem:-0 hugs jan xx

M. L. Kiser September 5, 2020 at 10:07 AM Now that was fun! Enjoyed. Jan Allison September 5, 2020 at 10:44 AM thanks ML the first poem was for a contest but i couldn't resist extending the story a little:-) hugs Jan xx

Linda Alice Fowler September 3, 2020 at 6:48 PM love the title Jan ;) Linda Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:10 AM Thanks Linda, I couldn't resist the title lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Lindsay Laurie September 3, 2020 at 5:05 PM Hello Jan ... aside from your enjoyable limerick set, a friend of mine discovered why his son was so keen to use the trampoline. The woman next door was sunbaking topless - thanks once again Jan - Lindsay Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:09 AM hahaha love it:-) hugs Jan xx

Paul Callus September 2, 2020 at 9:04 AM Your limericks never fail to deliver, Jan:) The initial contest one is great, but the extension is also worthy of note lol. Hugs // paul Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:09 AM thanks Paul I do enjoy this form:-) hugs jan xx

Emilia James September 1, 2020 at 3:10 PM lol and thank you again Jan. Emilia xx Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:06 AM thanks for reading Emilia:-) hugs jan xx

Pashang Salehi August 31, 2020 at 12:21 PM Thanks again, I needed that... Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:06 AM glad you enjoyed the humour Pash my sweet butterfly friend:-) hugs jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen August 31, 2020 at 6:51 AM - Every place has such a neighbor so I see a bit of the charm ... there are quite a few weird people out there ... or "birds" ... (I have birds ... lots of birds :) - Really funny, Jan :) - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:01 AM lol thanks sweet friend:-) hugs jan xx

Viv Wigley August 30, 2020 at 11:52 PM Oh, Matron! Great romp, Jan, a tonic. Hope you're both well. Viv x Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 10:01 AM thanks Mr Viv couldnt be better - covid free 106 days here and apart from the border being closed its pretty much back to normal:-) hugs jan xx

Michelle Faulkner August 30, 2020 at 7:17 PM So glad you posted the 'extended' version, Jan - I can relate to the neighbor's wife seeing red- Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 9:47 AM Thanks Michelle - must be awful if this was for real with the neighbour being a peeping tom:-( hugs jan xx

David Grimm August 30, 2020 at 6:55 PM Bawdy indeed. David Jan Allison September 4, 2020 at 9:47 AM thanks David:-) hugs jan xx

Tom Cunningham August 30, 2020 at 2:52 PM Love the extended version Jan, pure Benny Hill bawdy lol. Tom Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 2:57 PM lol yes it is slightly Benny Hillesque lol:-) I am flattered Tom:-) hugs jan xx

Rico Leffanta August 30, 2020 at 11:29 AM Thanks for the laugh! But where did you find that photograph of me focused on Brandie? Aloha! Rico Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 1:36 PM oh I hope you dont mind me posting it Rico lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Ilene Bauer August 30, 2020 at 11:07 AM ha! glad you did, jan! very funny! Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 1:36 PM thanks Ilene:-) hugs jan xx

Carolyn Devonshire August 30, 2020 at 10:37 AM Hilarious, Jan. I like the expanded version as much as the original. Great limerick! Hugs, Carolyn Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 1:35 PM I like the extended version too lol:-) hugs Jan xx

John Jones August 30, 2020 at 10:22 AM Love this. Really tickled my funny bone. More please. Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 1:34 PM I try and write fun poems John especially love limericks probably posted over 500:-) hugs Jan xx

Bobby May August 30, 2020 at 8:58 AM Hahahahahahahaha, love it Sis!! Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 9:15 AM lol Bobby I couldn't resist extending the poem so glad you found it funny:-) hugs jan xx

Charlie Smith August 30, 2020 at 8:38 AM Some muses never change, thank God. You are a treasure to this site Some muses never change, thank God. Jan, you are a treasure to this site... Jan Allison August 30, 2020 at 8:55 AM oh tell me again Charlie lol:-) I just try and make folk smile if folk dont like it then don't have to read:-) hugs Jan I am so glad you commented, I am so glad you commented xxx Charlie Smith August 30, 2020 at 8:40 AM I don't know what happened .