L Milton Hankins Poet Light Verse

The Undertaker

The undertaker anticipates a better day
His plans include some needed lawnmowing,
He winds up two ne'er-do-wells stowing
Without resources their expenses to pay
The mere cost for a proper putting-away,
While his grass continues to grow knee high
As he waits for a moneyed man to die
Someone to keep his creditors at bay,
Such a day does make for sleepless nights
Hoping for the best, needing the worse
To make the payment on his brand new hearse.

Written September 8, 2022

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Caren Krutsinger September 13, 2022 at 6:43 AM I love this "Hoping for the best, needing the worse" L Milton Hankins September 13, 2022 at 8:23 AM I suppose they kind of live with this every day.

Linda Alice Fowler September 9, 2022 at 8:04 AM Ha Milt! My niece is a funeral director (mortician, bone collector). She doesn't have time to cut the grass, or wish for more death - seems it's perfect job security :) She will love this, as I do! Linda L Milton Hankins September 9, 2022 at 8:24 AM I have a first cousin who inherited his parents funeral home in W.Va. He always wanted to be a fireman, but his parents have made him quite successful (and wealthy). We jokingly say he was adopted with a silver spoon in his mouth! Seriously, Tommy is a fine fellow and a very fine funeral director.

Jenna Logan September 9, 2022 at 7:02 AM Somehow you turned the undertaker's woes into something more serious than death, but you did it quite well. He might've put off buying those new wheels. L Milton Hankins September 9, 2022 at 8:25 AM True, Jenna. He probably should have saved up first.

John Lawless September 9, 2022 at 4:54 AM perhaps he's looking for a "hearse" of a different color L Milton Hankins September 9, 2022 at 8:25 AM (chuckling)

Tom Cunningham September 9, 2022 at 2:30 AM Lol, sounds like his business is dying (groan) L Milton Hankins September 9, 2022 at 8:27 AM He gets very few complaints from his clients, Tom. (groan even more!) My uncle used his "slab" to wash my aunt's hair. She told him it was too hard to be comfortable. He told her he doesn't get any complaints. Actually happened. My aunt died a few months back at 102. My cousin inherited the funeral home...and the fortune, I might add.

Michael Tor September 8, 2022 at 10:05 PM LOL. I wonder Milton what their real frame of mind is like in real life? For instance when they want to buy a Hearst like you mentioned. Are they wishing more people would die? It is a place I would not want to be in or a profession I would want to participate in. I always thought they were a strange bunch, but I guess they are needed and I am glad I do not have to do their Job, would absolutely not want too. Thanks for the irony in this one you created in me Milton. Have a good evening... L Milton Hankins September 9, 2022 at 8:28 AM With a funeral home in the family, I have a better understanding of the profession. No, they really don't want people to die, but they recognize the inevitability of it. Something many of us don't wish to acknowledge.

Jeff Kyser September 8, 2022 at 2:08 PM Ha, I like this. I don't want be on his "to do" list, lol. L Milton Hankins September 8, 2022 at 8:01 PM Me neither, Jeff. I figured you would get a kick out of it.