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The Mariner

The Mariner's old salted-air skin, leather tight, on a mast-hard frame of bones and flash flood rushing blood, faces ice-fed winds bouncing his ship and helm cockeyed on continuous curling waves from Nature's rough hewn seas, beneath skunk-colored skies Standing redwood tall, in a locked jawed face of stormy, screaming weather with honey badger determination, to fight for the aging breath and life of his vessel, of foot worn,handmade English Oak, in a lion and hyena fight with the storm Hoping the molten core of flaming,fiery light from the sun, bursts through volcanic ashen clouds, leaving his still sided barnacle plugged wormwood planks attached, until he reaches shore 4/25/17 contest Word Play Images, Dense and Pithy

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017




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Date: 5/25/2017 2:11:00 PM
Wow, this is so exceptional, Frederic! The description, the alliteration, the imagery...stunningly good! Congrats on your well deserved top win!! 7+++ and a fave :)
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Date: 5/24/2017 9:36:00 PM
Congrats on win, Frederic.
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Date: 5/8/2017 8:24:00 AM
Success! Well-done, Frederic. One of the great human endeavors. : )
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Date: 5/7/2017 4:26:00 PM
Yes! You nailed all of it: word play, images, dense (very dense!) and pithy. I especially like the echo-beat of foot/worn, hand/made, Eng/lish... like footsteps somehow, not meter, but meat-ier. Now, this is for a contest that is asking for "dense" but I sense you already know that this is like one of those mega-steaks you get a trophy to eat. Each image here is strong, GOOD, I see MANY 6oz fillet mignons. You've got 72 ouncer in one sitting ;) The only other advice I have is: hyphens!
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Cyndi Macmillan
Date: 5/7/2017 4:46:00 PM
PS- So glad you invited me to this read to see what I thought. It's a ride! So.. hyphens... salted-air, mast-hard, ice-fed, skunk-colored. I'm not sure who's sponsoring this contest, but (from past experience) I know some can be sticklers for grammar/syntax. and this may help en.oxforddictionaries.com/punctuation/hyphen HUGS!
Date: 5/1/2017 12:04:00 PM
My grandfather was a master mariner...one of the last iron men of the wooden ships. I am currently writing a novel based on his and my grandmother's life entitled 'The Mariner's Wife'. Slow going...much research involved. You really captured the essence of a Mariner's soul with this free verse. my friend. Elaine
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Date: 4/28/2017 2:22:00 PM
such a visual delight with an array of descriptive artwords, frederick.. enjoyed your mariner piece..huggs
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Date: 4/27/2017 4:25:00 PM
Hi Frederick: I love the animal imagery you approached in your poem. It made sound more sea faring!
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Date: 4/26/2017 12:12:00 AM
I love the the fierce animal imagery you used to convey the struggles in this exciting poem Frederic. I felt like I was a witness to it all. Excellent! 7 ; )
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Date: 4/25/2017 5:03:00 PM
Great description, Frederic. Good luck in the contest.
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Date: 4/25/2017 2:10:00 PM
Really cool Frederic and now I'm glad I didn't enter the contest. I wouldn't stand a chance against this fantastic piece of writing. Dark and damp and very well done
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