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The Mad Rush

Quickly He ran dropping his pants in a mad rush!
Bush's Beans for lunch, a build up of gas for old Gus!
His ass hit the toilet seat so fast!
Outward came a disturbing loud blast!
The house shook, the dog growled, and the wife blushed!

The neighbors called 911, they are on their way!
The fireman rushed in, put on their gas mask right away!
He got up, and asked, "What is all the fuss?
The fireman said, " You blew up the house Gus"
"Now bend over." They sprayed Glade, and called it a day.




Did you think it was
going to be about
mad rush shopping
on black Friday? lol

Copyright © Michael Tor | Year Posted 2024

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Michael Tor Date: 12/13/2024 7:50:00 PM Hi Jennifer thanks for the visit, yes you couldn't get me out there during that day. Glad it made you laugh. Thanks for stopping by will come by and read your Poetry, blessings Dear Lady... Login to Reply

Jennifer Proxenos Date: 12/8/2024 8:48:00 PM Black Friday shopping is ONE HUGE frustration and I hate queues. Granted one .does find bargains but is it worth the time and labour put into it - not for me I'm afraid . Had a laugh with your write my friend . BLESSINGS Jennifer Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/13/2024 8:06:00 PM Thank you Dear lady for your visit. I wrote you a comment but it landed on the page instead of you....

Hilda Greenhough Date: 12/6/2024 6:36:00 PM It's all part of God's design. Some are more blessed than others. You made me laugh. Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/7/2024 10:11:00 AM Hilda I am so glad you laughed. That makes me happy lol. Sorry for my warp sense of humor.

Paula Goldsmith Date: 12/3/2024 11:37:00 AM I enjoyed reading your fun "The Mad Rush" write. Guess anyone thinking about mad rush shopping on black Friday was very wrong. Thanks for the laugh. Watch out for the beans, they will get you every time. Hahaha!!!  Have a fun day writing away............. Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/3/2024 10:47:00 PM H ha ha yes Paula they were very wrong lol. I hope you enjoyed my fun Limerick. Anne E Sangster -k wrote a great one. Please read hers it is Hilarious...

Paul Callus Date: 12/3/2024 9:28:00 AM Hi Michael...you sure got me with the title, but it was definitely worth the visit :) and the comments down below substantiate my claim! ~ Regards // paul Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/3/2024 10:44:00 PM Paul so glad it was worth it. I hope it wasn't too crude. We all need some humor during the Festive season my friend. Thank you for your visi, it is nice to see you posting again...

Anne E Sangster - K Date: 12/2/2024 3:38:00 PM Hi Michael. Yes, I thought your Mad rush title was about black Friday shopping, lol. What the devil was in those beans; hot sause? Thanks for the chuckle this evening :-D Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/3/2024 10:43:00 PM What was with those beans my secret recipe, lol. Anne thanks for stopping by sorry you thought it was going to be about the Mad Holiday Rush On Black Friday, ha ha fooled ya. lol. Hope it wasn't too crude. Thank you for your much appreciated comment and the laugh I just read your Poem lol. Anyone that reads this comment go visit Anne's Poem you will get a loud surprise lol...

Sotto Poet Date: 12/2/2024 12:48:00 PM Hi Michael, Bean consumption should be done with caution. That was just so funny, my friend! I'm so glad that everything turned out well in the end! Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/2/2024 1:06:00 PM Ha ha ha Lasaad love your ending clever my friend. You are right they should put warning signs on bean cans. Caution could cause Explosive reaction. lol. Thank you for stopping by my friend hope all is well. God you bless and all you love...

Maria Williams Date: 12/1/2024 11:19:00 PM One must be careful about eating Beans Michael. May be too much thanksgiving dinner Eh . I thought when trecking through the Rocky mountains (not to say I've been there - I have not) - that you had a 'bear behind' when a bear was following you - Lol Hugs Maria Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/1/2024 11:27:00 PM Lol so funny Maria. You know what's funny Maria I have been through the Rockies on my way to California (Orland) from New York on a Amtrak Train for three days enjoying the views and sites one of the best things I ever did. It was breath taking going through the Rockies in January. Train broke down in New Mexico had to switch Trains. Went through the Famous Donner pass in California. Hugs back at you, thank you for your visit.

Robert Gorelick Date: 12/1/2024 10:27:00 AM I'm glad everything came out alright at the end. Your elegant words overfloweth. My best, Robert Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/1/2024 12:56:00 PM Hey Robert your words put a smile on my face. I thought I get everyone in a festive mood this month and December to get them in a Holiday mood. Thanks for your visit my friend it is always so nice to hear from you... God bless ...

Joe Dimino Date: 11/30/2024 10:05:00 PM Holiday season off with a blast! Cauliflower, broccoli, sardines and beer -- Santa would be launched coming down that chimney. Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/1/2024 12:59:00 PM Ha ha Joe your right about Santa Rocket fuel gas if he had all that you wrote. The poor reindeer they would suffer through all their deliveries of toys to all the boys and girls. Lol. Thanks Joe for you humor and participation in this awful to read Limerick lol. Blessings...

Gershon Wolf Date: 11/30/2024 9:42:00 PM Get me that Glade, FAAAAAAAST! ~ Little Stinker. Enjoyed this one, Michael, as I have a cold in my nose. lol. Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 12/1/2024 1:08:00 PM Lol thank God for Glade for those awkward moments we sometimes have. Nothing worst than going to the bathroom leaving a fowl smell having guest over and realizing you are out of Glade As you watch your guest walking into the bathroom after you, and becoming a victim of your atrocious gas. lol. I thought of putting a sign in front of the bathroom door. Inhale at your own risk. lol. Sorry to hear about your cold Gershon, chicken soup,is a great remedy. Hope you feel better. Thank you for putting up with my demented humor. Blessings my friend...and thanks for the visit...

Andrea Dietrich Date: 11/30/2024 10:21:00 AM Great hilarity, my friend. Gassing up for the holiday season! Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 11/30/2024 11:37:00 AM Lol much gas with all the great assortments of fine food, turkey, pie, mash potatoes and hopefully no beans lol. That is a great recipe for a bathroom disaster. Lol. Thank you Andrea for stopping by and reading this awful situation. Lol.

John Read Date: 11/30/2024 9:04:00 AM Hi Michael, those beans also brussel sprouts can be lethal,luckily he was a great sprinter, maybe a cork up is bum would help. Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 11/30/2024 11:41:00 AM John that's a great Idea corking him up. Lol. Oh I know about the Brussels sprouts. I remember one day at work, when a fellow worker put Brussels Sprouts in the micro wave. What a stink that created. He waked around telling everyone it was the Brussel Sprouts not him that smelled, lol. I hope you enjoyed my friend. Have a nice day and wishing you a joyous Holiday...This Season...

Victor Buhagiar Date: 11/30/2024 2:38:00 AM You depict a great sprinter. I hate diarrhoea. Quite a funny limerick. Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 11/30/2024 11:44:00 AM Thank you Victor. I am not fond of that either. I hope you at least put a smile on from reading. Fun and humor for the Holidays, I wish to create. Thank you for stopping by, it is always a pleasure to read your comments. God bless...

Tom Cunningham Date: 11/29/2024 10:46:00 PM Lol, got there in the nick of time. Happens to the best of us haha. Enjoy your weekend Michael. Tom Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 11/30/2024 11:49:00 AM Yes Tom it happens to the best of us. I wrote another Limerick with it, I thought you would enjoy. Hopefully these Limericks can bring a little cheer during the holidays. You are one of the best at writing Limericks, Jack Ellison is also but he has been gone for a while, I miss him, and Jane Allison one of my favorite Limerick writers. Anaya posted her new book on the site. I am sure it's a great book to read... Enjoy your day my friend and come back and read the second Limerick, if you have time... God bless.

Kim Rodrigues Date: 11/29/2024 8:53:00 PM My cousin ran into his brother’s house straight for the toilet! Then he hears from the tub, Uncle T! And he was on a first date. He married her nonetheless…what a hoot, holla and scuttle-butt ;) Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 11/30/2024 11:53:00 AM Ha ha and I thought this was fiction lol. So glad they married Kim. I hope he managed to his bowel movements better lol. I wrote a second Limerick to go with the first one, if you get a chance come and see the second one. God bless...

Karen Jones Date: 11/29/2024 5:11:00 PM Bahahaha! Sooooo funny! Thanks for the laugh Michael! Login to Reply Michael Tor Date: 11/30/2024 11:50:00 AM Ha Ha so glad it brightened up your day Karen. Your very welcomed. I wrote a second one to go with the first. If you get a chance come and read the second one. thanks and God bless...