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The Big Interview

Sam Dumpty here for National Geoplastic Magazine. Fox news has once again scored an amazing coup by securing an interview with an angel. But not just any angel folks, we're talking the big Kahuna, the Prince of Darkness, the Ogre of all ogres, the Bad Boy of bad boys... well, you get the idea. Of all the interviews I've done, this one is the biggie. The setting (by his request): Starbucks on Ventura boulevard in East L.A. I order a vanilla latte, cold. The tension in the room is palpable, the anticipation almost unbearable. I was told he likes to be fashionably late and sure enough, we're already an hour past the scheduled time. Just as everyone is about to pack up, in walks this dude in an Elvis suit with a huge entourage. I think to myself - is this some kind of joke? But as I look closer, the red skin and conspicuous horns give him away. That's our guy all right! He takes a seat at my table and orders a pumpkin spice latte, extra hot. In this moment, everything seems to be going in slo-mo. As his drink arrives, his eyes suddenly meet mine, sending a chill down my spine. Nevertheless, I am determined to carry on. Sam: "Elvis?" Devil: "Ha! What can I say? My PR demon has a wicked sense of humor." Sam: "Gotcha. I understand you're a busy fellow and have only granted us a few minutes, so let's get right into it, shall we?" Devil: "This is your gig, dude. Go for it." Sam: "You've got a reputation for evil, to say the least. Any truth to the accusation?" Devil: "FAKE NEWS! LIES! Hey, why am I being interviewed by a talking egg anyway? I was promised an interview with Dan Rather, he does all the rock stars, and I am the Rock Star of rock stars, so what's the deal? I'm blowing this pop stand..." (Cameras off, the director and production staff rush out to placate the raving diva. After a bit, things calm down and the interview resumes) Sam: "Sorry about the last-minute substitution, Mr. Rather had a more pressing interview appointment today, a certain Mick Jagger. Do you know him?" Devil: "We're buds. Or at least we were. I don't like to be upstaged." Sam: "Now, you've been a world traveler for some, oh, six thousand years or so. Got a favorite food?" Devil: "Devilled eggs. Ha! Always wanted to say that. Uh, can I get a booyah? (crowd responds - BOOYAH! BOOYAH!) Seriously though, there's nothing like corn fed Texas beef. Thick, rare, juicy. Yum." Sam: "Nice. Is there anything you haven't done? Anything on your bucket list?" Devil: "World domination. Oh, wait! Got that one already, muwahahahaha. Uh, let me see... Well, always wanted to visit the North Pole but I'm really, really sensitive to the cold. Oh, and I've never bungeed over the Grand Canyon. Can't seem to get up the nerve." Sam: "I see we are just about out of time. One final question: Rumor has it your reign of terror is soon to come to an end. Your response?" Devil: "FAKE NEWS! LIES! I'm running for a third epoch. I don't care about the rules. You won't get rid of me that easy! I plan on ruling for another thousand years. No, make that two thousand! I've got my homeys to back me..." Dumpty here. We had to cut the cameras as that last question provoked an hour-long tirade that quickly descended into a rather profane rant. To be honest, we were all a bit surprised he managed to avoid censorship during the interview at all. I guess it just goes to show that even a bad boy can tame down for a few moments if he tries really hard. This is Sam Dumpty for National Geoplastic Magazine, signing off-

Copyright © | Year Posted 2025




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Date: 5/23/2025 10:45:00 PM
Imaginative write here Tom..I am intruiged by Your interviewers persona..Have a look at an Older piece of mine ( eggs acting revenge 1) I suppose thoughts on characters are lible to Occur similarly or maybe you've read it before.? No stress..I'd appreciate your thoughts though All blessings.'
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/24/2025 6:08:00 AM
I'll see if I can find it. Thx Joe
Date: 5/22/2025 11:27:00 PM
dropping by to thank you for your comments on my abandon poem...yes, basically it's how summer sways when she arrives ...it won potd citation!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/23/2025 5:01:00 AM
Yes I left a second comment. Thx for clarifying
Date: 5/19/2025 12:21:00 PM
Yes, Satan is on a last hour rampage, well, I think so, however with God's timetable time like it is or worse could go on for years. If I live long enough, I will see what the future holds. Thanks for sharing this one with us. Sara K
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/19/2025 12:34:00 PM
Yes it would be nice to be alive to witness in person the end of his dominion
Date: 5/17/2025 4:00:00 PM
I read this out loud to my husband, I had begun reading it and stopped till I called him in, this is a fantastic write, Tom! You need a bigger audience than we lucky ones here, a radio podcast?! Wow!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/17/2025 4:16:00 PM
I had actually considered doing an audio for it. I have Sam's voice already but was trying to think of a voice for the bad boy. Barry White came to mind lol. Thx much
Date: 5/17/2025 2:57:00 PM
lol you are so creative and have a fun spirit that entertains us to no end. Loved it, :)
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/17/2025 3:04:00 PM
Thx. We (Sam and I) try our best
Date: 5/17/2025 10:47:00 AM
You must definitely showed how charismatic he is. His jealousy, and maybe the presidential aspects of it. Always some good from your pen, Tom. Blessings to you!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/17/2025 11:49:00 AM
Thx GS. Do we know each other?
Date: 5/16/2025 7:10:00 AM
Tom, this is so imaginative and engaging as you create the whole scene and dialogue. You are such an excellent storyteller! Lots of food for thought here. Enjoyed the read! :)
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/16/2025 7:15:00 AM
My attempt at humor. Thx Laura
Date: 5/15/2025 7:33:00 AM
Dear Tom, this is hilarious! Made me laugh. Love the writing. I'd love to read more of these interviews!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/15/2025 7:35:00 AM
He once interviewed a giant Panda in China. He's been around... Thx
Date: 5/14/2025 9:20:00 AM
Very cool- I liked its style, very clever lol
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/14/2025 9:37:00 AM
Thank you
Date: 5/12/2025 11:59:00 PM
This is one of your most ingenious creations. Couldn't surmise what questions would be put and what response the Prince of Darkness would give. "don't care about the rules. You won't get rid of me that easy! I plan on ruling for another thousand years. No, make that two thousand! I've got my homeys to back me...". Seeing the present developments, it is most likely that this prediction is going to be sadly fulfilled. A wonderful piece, dear Tom.
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/13/2025 5:39:00 AM
I'm glad you liked it Valsa
Date: 5/12/2025 11:22:00 PM
Dear Funny Man, this is pure comedic gold! I mean, the Prince of Darkness in an Elvis suit at a Starbucks ordering a pumpkin spice latte? Absolute genius! I was half-expecting him to ask for a gluten-free muffin to go with it. And the whole "FAKE NEWS!" bit? Classic! I guess even the Devil has to keep up with the times. The fact that his bucket list includes bungee jumping over the Grand Canyon...well, I guess even the Lord of the Underworld needs a little thrill now and then! This needs to be a series—"Sam Dumpty Interviews the Universe's Most Questionable Characters." Brilliant stuff as always...Hugs
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/13/2025 5:39:00 AM
Very kind. Looking forward to your new creation :)
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Maria Williams
Date: 5/12/2025 11:28:00 PM
Still working on the one inspired by your 'Last Dance amid the Stars' should be done in a week tops, i'm calling it An Astral Lament
Date: 5/12/2025 7:32:00 PM
Pretty funny, but I have no sympathy for this devil!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/13/2025 5:38:00 AM
He's a wily one
Date: 5/12/2025 4:19:00 PM
Sam Dumpty's interview with the baddest of them all! deviled eggs lol. Spectacularly done, monsieur~ your a reporter at large
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I Am Anaya
Date: 5/13/2025 9:06:00 AM
Yikes!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/12/2025 4:40:00 PM
Next on Sam's list: Donald Trump. Yipe!
Date: 5/12/2025 2:09:00 PM
:)
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/12/2025 2:16:00 PM
Better than a frown I always say...
Date: 5/12/2025 10:25:00 AM
Tom, my dear poet friend, this is just fantastic and full of creativity. Reading this was a pleasure for me. Excellent subject matter and a strong challenger. I appreciate you taking the time to visit my page and providing comments.
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/12/2025 10:58:00 AM
Yessir and thx
Date: 5/11/2025 8:22:00 PM
This is briiliant and very creative/imaginative my dear poet friend Tom. I love and enjoyed reading this immensely. Thanks a lot for making my day bright on this piece. An awesome share and a great contender in the contest. Thanks for sharing and reading one of my poems, too. Best wishes always and more blessings to you and your poetry. Hugs
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/12/2025 5:32:00 AM
Muchos gracias Len
Date: 5/11/2025 3:36:00 PM
Tom, this was hilarious--sharp, witty, and full of ridiculous charm! I laughed out loud at “devilled eggs” and the PR demon with a flair for Elvis. You absolutely nailed the satire, and the pacing kept it moving like a real interview trainwreck. A devilishly good read!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/11/2025 4:22:00 PM
Trainwreck. I love it. Poor Sam, though the odds were against him from the get go
Date: 5/10/2025 1:04:00 AM
Quite funny, Tom. Perhaps Satan might present himself in a tuxedo.
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/10/2025 5:02:00 AM
Or a wedding gown. He's eclectic if anything
Date: 5/9/2025 9:35:00 AM
Yes sir, creative and entertaining...what a fun read...the Elvis suit detail is a brilliant touch. You da man, Tom...LOL
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 9:38:00 AM
Sam's da man. I'm just passing it on...
Date: 5/9/2025 7:36:00 AM
Very interesting...I like that your making fun... you chose quite the character. Personally i wouldn't want to propagate that false image of Satan with red horns etc... but I get that your being cheeky. It's a funny piece full of your creative talent! Xo
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Crystol Woods
Date: 5/9/2025 10:12:00 AM
Right. Lol
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 7:51:00 AM
Definitely meant to be cheeky lol. He's being interviewed by an eggman
Date: 5/9/2025 7:26:00 AM
Funny stuff, Tommy. Very imaginative. Though I think perhaps he looks and acts very charming and is maybe wearing the skin of Bill Gates or Fauci.
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 7:27:00 AM
Well, he's got the fake news mantra going so...
Date: 5/9/2025 7:24:00 AM
Hello Tom, you always take me somewhere unexpected and this time to a Starbucks showdown with the Devil in an Elvis suit! Your wit, wild imagination, and knack for satire make every scene jump and hilarious. Even the underworld needs a good latte and a punchline. Spring Blessings, My Friend, Daniel
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 7:28:00 AM
Rumor has it he was humiliated and vowed to never agree to an interview again. Time will tell
Date: 5/8/2025 11:45:00 PM
Lolol this is hilarious for some reason, deviled eggs ! Lol and elvis? Thats creative of you to come up with that name for this narcissistic devil! Cant imagine any other way for this interview to end as it has here, in yours, i love that you mentioned Starbucks, for sure any devils favorite place too, i used to like their chocolate Frappuccino! As for the interview, i can see youv really enjoyed doing this! And it did make me laugh. Is this for the contest? If so best wishes! Sending you light always
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 5:32:00 AM
I'm glad I tickled your funny bone. I can picture you smiling so that's nice
Date: 5/8/2025 7:49:00 PM
Sam: " You've got a reputation for evil, to say the least. Any truth to the accusation? " This thought says it all. Asking the devil to be honest, when he's the father of lies. Ouch ! I think Sam handled that interview the best he could. Foshu
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 5:32:00 AM
Fosho fosho lol. Sam's no fool. He's like a well trained attorney, ie, never ask a question you don't already know the answer to
Date: 5/8/2025 9:35:00 AM
certainly a scoop netflix would have wanted to grab... you rocked and rolled this one, tom..engaging, creative headliner!
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Tom Woody
Date: 5/9/2025 5:30:00 AM
Disney could have benefitted from snagging this one. Thx

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