The Anti-Zombie Housing Market
folks, there is a brand spanking new
kind of idiot
that walks amongst us &
no,
s/he is not a ****ing zombie---
some film mustered creature who
erupts from the dead like some
fictional biblical bullshit
to wreak havoc on the rest of us
who deserve to suffer at the hands of
something that thanks to
Romero, O’Bannon, P.Jackson & the
Halperin brothers, we have to
endure.
the idiot in question of course is the
rich individual who has taken the time,
effort & moola to create anti-zombie
fortresses in the US, to protect
themselves from the
“zombie apocalypse”---
a special example of american
stupidity,
which because of the few random events
in the recent past, where morons
full of bath salts & meth have
gone on to a career in
munching on the face of their
fellow
delicious-looking, human,
has plagued the minds of those who
have nothing better to do &
nothing more to worry about
than the impossible attack from
a work of fiction.
while not much different than the
rich christians who go to such great
lengths as giving money to senators
who will push the further armament of
Israel, as well as always supporting
any kind of instigation brought on by
the good ol’ US of A, in the
middle east, with the hope that it will
bring about their “armageddon” a
little sooner,
these fanatics doing their damndest to
fend off zombies
(rising from the dead & for some reason
showing up on said idiot’s doorstep)
have gone the extra mile to invest in
what are often referred to as
“modern day castles.”
ranging from $600,000 (drop in
the bucket) to $12 million (steep, but ya
know we are talking about zombies here
people)
these dwellings o’ the delusional
bear such amenities as fully
fledged moats surrounding the premises,
underground missile silo bunkerdom,
personal air strips, panic rooms, safe cores,
helicopter landing pads, sniper towers &
even windows rumored to fend off
missiles as well (because apparently
zombies choose from a wide range of
violent killing methods) &
to add to the hilarity (hopelessness) of
it all, now they are being put on the
market for whatever reason…
maybe said rich imbecile has had a
bad string of financial luck, maybe they
are moving on to better & brighter
anti-zombie apocalypse compounds, or
maybe,
just maybe,
they have come to their senses?
Copyright © Andrew Delapruch | Year Posted 2012
Post Comments
Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.
Please
Login
to post a comment