Lin Lane Poet Haibun

Notes About The Poem

           As I Watch the Waves Crash Contest           

Sponsor: Anoucheka Gangabisson  ~  October 12, 2023

Swells of Crested Waves

Fading rays of day were giving way to twilight as I stood on the precipice overlooking the ocean. Minutes earlier, I was in the arms of the only man I'd ever loved... Sean. We'd said farewell beneath windswept branches of the tree we'd been married under a month earlier. Now, I watched him waiting on the beach for the skiff that would take him to the ship he'd captain for the next few months. The ship that would take him away from me.

sunset horizon
ocean currents swirl and sway ~
twilight on the cliff

I'd held back tears while in his arms, trying to be brave. But they were rolling down my cheeks as steadily as the waves were crashing ashore. Sean looked up at me as I raised a hand to my lips for one last kiss. I felt a surge of dizziness and the urge to run after him, but the schooner had dropped anchor in the bay. I took one step closer to the edge and then realized the danger. Blinded by tears, my mind gave little thought to tumbling down the cliff, but my heart... my heart was torn from grieving that soon Sean would be gone. 

footprints on the beach
giant swells of crested waves ~
blaring ocean roars

I watched as he sailed away, a speck upon the ocean. I felt a chill deep down in my soul as rivulets of saltwater fell from my eyes. I wished for wings, jealous of gulls who flew alongside Sean's vessel.  A Zepher wind tangled my hair and blew crested waves ashore. In my heart, I'd sail upon the tides where my love now resides.

high tide was ebbing
gulls followed a ship to sea ~
waves still crashed ashore

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Sotto Poet October 13, 2023 at 7:14 AM Dear Lin, your Haibun is a masterwork that conveyed separation and pain. Finality filled the air, making these two spirits appear unlikely to meet again. The amazing image transported readers to a land of dancing emotions and vibrant hues. Thanks for your uplifting comment on my page really appreciate it Lin Lane October 13, 2023 at 7:30 AM First of all, I'll address my comment to you. Your poetry has become so much more defined and eloquent, so it's always a pleasure to read your work, over and over. Now, I'll thank you for your insight into what I left unsaid in my Haibun. Someone who creates imagery as you do will always discern what the poet intended to be discovered. Thank you, most humbly for 'getting it.'

Karen Jones October 13, 2023 at 4:40 AM This was like watching a romantic movie a classic and never wanting it to end. The words writing upon the hearts of readers of the newlyweds agony in separation. How she watches the sea sail away her love. Your imagination is flawless and seems magical. This is perfect and a sure winner in the contest. The images are an asset but play second fiddle to your wizardry haikus. This is a wonderful presentation of your gifts poetess. Bravo. I had written much more but the capta thingy erased in error Lin Lane October 13, 2023 at 5:04 AM Karen, I am totally enamored with your plethora of beautiful comments! Thank you so very much for every gracious remark. Writing has sweet rewards when it’s appreciated by readers like you. Hugs.

David Kavanagh October 13, 2023 at 3:19 AM A beautifully delivered Haibun Lin, the heartbreaking separation is palpable to the reader, perhaps with a sense they will never see each other again, imagery is off the scale, and haiku’s bring the whole spectacle together seamlessly, brilliant! Cheers David Lin Lane October 13, 2023 at 4:39 AM The unwritten lines that perhaps he’d never return were exactly what I intended. Your perception is always keen and your comments always rewarding. Thanks so much, David.

Jerry Brotherton October 12, 2023 at 4:53 PM A remarkable Haibun, Lin. I have been on both sides of the sad goodbye. I can tell you, nobody wins and each one loses. Your words and Haiku fit perfectly together my friend. A favorite for me. Lin Lane October 12, 2023 at 5:12 PM Thank you, Jerry... my newfound poetry friend. I'm delighted with your kind thoughts.

Mike Gentile October 12, 2023 at 12:43 PM Lin, this is just exquisite! My heart beats with emotion at feeling the emotions conjured by your incredible piece! It's truly a treasure! Happy Thursday xxoo Lin Lane October 12, 2023 at 1:04 PM Hi, Mike. I don’t quite know what to reply to your compliments on this one except that your support of my poetry never fails to encourage me. I am so grateful for your continued reading. Hugs dear man.

Jan Allison October 12, 2023 at 11:26 AM Lin this is one of the best haibun I have read in a long time, I love the way it develops into a story over the 3 stanzas and haiku, good luck in the contest Lin. love the avatar by the way:-) hugs jan xx Lin Lane October 12, 2023 at 11:59 AM Thanks Jan, for commenting on my Haibun and avatar. I took it yesterday, deciding my horse had spent enough time racing with the wind in the sea. I was surprised when I found the picture that matched everything I'd written. That's usually how I do it, but it might be easier to find a pic and write a poem around it. You know I'm a rebel. lol.

Jay Narain October 12, 2023 at 10:31 AM Nice Halbun style poem. Picture, prose and haiku makes it a prefect write. Lin Lane October 12, 2023 at 11:14 AM Hi, Jay. I always appreciate the support you offer my poetry. Thank you.